<p><SPAN name="c3-15" id="c3-15"></SPAN> </p>
<p> </p>
<h3>CHAPTER XV.</h3>
<h4>"DISMISSAL. B. B."<br/> </h4>
<p>By return of post Lord Hampstead received the following answer to his
<span class="nowrap">letter;—</span><br/> </p>
<blockquote>
<p><span class="smallcaps">My dear Lord
Hampstead</span>,—</p>
<p>Mr. Crocker's case is <span class="u">a very bad one</span>;
but the Postmaster
General shall see your appeal, and his lordship will, I am
sure, sympathize with your humanity—as do I also. I
cannot take upon myself to say what his lordship will
think it right to do, and it will be better, therefore,
that you should abstain for the present from communicating
with Mr. Crocker.</p>
<p><span class="ind6">I am,</span><br/>
<span class="ind8">Your lordship's very faithful servant,</span></p>
<p class="ind15"><span class="smallcaps">Boreas
Bodkin</span>.<br/> </p>
</blockquote>
<p>Any excuse was sufficient to our Æolus to save him from the horror of
dismissing a man. He knew well that Crocker, as a public servant, was
not worth his salt. Sir Boreas was blessed,—or cursed,—with a
conscience, but the stings of his conscience, though they were
painful, did not hurt him so much as those of his feelings. He had
owned to himself on this occasion that Crocker must go. Crocker was
in every way distasteful to him. He was not only untrustworthy and
incapable, but audacious also, and occasionally impudent. He was a
clerk of whom he had repeatedly said that it would be much better to
pay him his salary and let him have perpetual leave of absence, than
keep him even if there were no salary to be paid. Now there had come
a case on which it was agreed by all the office that the man must go.
Destroy a bundle of official papers! Mr. Jerningham had been heard to
declare that the law was in fault in not having provided that a man
should be at once sent to Newgate for doing such a thing. "The stupid
old fool's letters weren't really worth anything," Sir Boreas had
said, as though attempting to palliate the crime! Mr. Jerningham had
only shaken his head. What else could he do? It was not for him to
dispute any matter with Sir Boreas. But to his thinking the old
gentleman's letters had become precious documents, priceless records,
as soon as they had once been bound by the red tape of the
Government, and enveloped by the security of an official pigeon-hole.
To stay away without leave,—to be drunk,—to be obstinately
idle,—to be impudent, were great official sins; but Mr. Jerningham
was used to them, and knew that as they had often occurred before, so
would they re-occur. Clerks are mortal men, and will be idle, will be
reckless, will sometimes get into disreputable rows. A little added
severity, Mr. Jerningham thought, would improve his branch of the
department, but, knowing the nature of men, the nature especially of
Sir Boreas, he could make excuses. Here, however, was a case in which
no superior Civil Servant could entertain a doubt. And yet Sir Boreas
palliated even this crime! Mr. Jerningham shook his head, and Sir
Boreas shoved on one side, so as to avoid for a day the pain of
thinking about them, the new bundle of papers which had already
formed itself on the great Crocker case. If some one would tear up
that, what a blessing it would be!</p>
<p>In this way there was delay, during which Crocker was not allowed to
show his face at the office, and during this delay Clara Demijohn
became quite confirmed in her determination to throw over her
engagement. Tribbledale with his £120 would be much better than
Crocker with nothing. And then it was agreed generally in Paradise
Row that there was something romantic in Tribbledale's constancy.
Tribbledale was in the Row every day,—or perhaps rather every
night;—seeking counsel from Mrs. Grimley, and comforting himself
with hot gin-and-water. Mrs. Grimley was good-natured, and impartial
to both the young men. She liked customers, and she liked marriages
generally. "If he ain't got no income of course he's out of the
running," Mrs. Grimley said to Tribbledale, greatly comforting the
young man's heart. "You go in and win," said Mrs. Grimley, indicating
by that her opinion that the ardent suitor would probably be
successful if he urged his love at the present moment. "Strike while
the iron is hot," she said, alluding probably to the heat to which
Clara's anger would be warmed by the feeling that the other lover had
lost his situation just when he was most bound to be careful in
maintaining it.</p>
<p>Tribbledale went in and pleaded his case. It is probable that just at
this time Clara herself was made acquainted with Tribbledale's
frequent visits to The Duchess, and though she may not have been
pleased with the special rendezvous selected, she was gratified by
the devotion shown. When Mrs. Grimley advised Tribbledale to "go in
and win," she was, perhaps, in Clara's confidence. When a girl has
told all her friends that she is going to be married, and has already
expended a considerable portion of the sum of money allowed for her
wedding garments, she cannot sink back into the simple position of an
unengaged young woman without pangs of conscience and qualms of
remorse. Paradise Row knew that her young man was to be dismissed
from his office, and condoled with her frequently and most
unpleasantly. Mrs. Duffer was so unbearable in the matter that the
two ladies had quarrelled dreadfully. Clara from the first moment of
her engagement with Crocker had been proud of the second string to
her bow, and now perceived that the time had come in which it might
be conveniently used.</p>
<p>It was near eleven when Tribbledale knocked at the door of No. 10,
but nevertheless Clara was up, as was also the servant girl, who
opened the door for the sake of discretion. "Oh, Daniel, what hours
you do keep!" said Clara, when the young gentleman was shown into the
parlour. "What on earth brings you here at such a time as this?"</p>
<p>Tribbledale was never slow to declare that he was brought thither by
the overwhelming ardour of his passion. His love for Clara was so old
a story, and had been told so often, that the repeating of it
required no circumlocution. Had he chanced to meet her in the High
Street on a Sunday morning, he would have begun with it at once.
"Clara," he said, "will you have me? I know that that other scoundrel
is a ruined man."</p>
<p>"Oh, Daniel, you shouldn't hit those as are down."</p>
<p>"Hasn't he been hitting me all the time that I was down? Hasn't he
triumphed? Haven't you been in his arms?"</p>
<p>"Laws; no."</p>
<p>"And wasn't that hitting me when I was down, do you think?"</p>
<p>"It never did you any harm."</p>
<p>"Oh, Clara;—if you knew the nature of my love you'd understand the
harm. Every time he has pressed your lips I have heard it, though I
was in King's Head Court all the time."</p>
<p>"That must be a crammer, Daniel."</p>
<p>"I did;—not with the ears of my head, but with the fibres of my
breast."</p>
<p>"Oh;—ah. But, Daniel, you and Sam used to be such friends at the
first go off."</p>
<p>"Go off of what?"</p>
<p>"When he first took to coming after me. You remember the tea-party,
when Marion Fay was here."</p>
<p>"I tried it on just then;—I did. I thought that, maybe, I might come
not to care about it so much."</p>
<p>"I'm sure you acted it very well."</p>
<p>"And I thought that perhaps it might be the best way of touching that
cold heart of yours."</p>
<p>"Cold! I don't know as my heart is colder than anybody else's heart."</p>
<p>"Would that you would make it warm once more for me."</p>
<p>"Poor Sam!" said Clara, putting her handkerchief up to her eyes.</p>
<p>"Why is he any poorer than me? I was first. At any rate I was before
him."</p>
<p>"I don't know anything about firsts or lasts," said Clara, as the
ghosts of various Banquos flitted before her eyes.</p>
<p>"And as for him, what right has he to think of any girl? He's a poor
mean creature, without the means of getting so much as a bed for a
wife to lie on. He used to talk so proud of Her Majesty's Civil
Service. Her Majesty's Civil Service has sent him away packing."</p>
<p>"Not yet, Daniel."</p>
<p>"They have. I've made it my business to find out, and Sir Boreas
Bodkin has written the order to-day. 'Dismissal—B. B.' I know those
who have seen the very words written in the punishment book of the
Post Office."</p>
<p>"Poor Sam!"</p>
<p>"Destroying papers of the utmost importance about Her Majesty's Mail
Service! What else was he to expect? And now he's penniless."</p>
<p>"A hundred and twenty isn't so very much, Daniel."</p>
<p>"Mr. Fay was saying only the other day that if I was married and
settled they'd make it better for me."</p>
<p>"You're too fond of The Duchess, Daniel."</p>
<p>"No, Clara—no; I deny that. You ask Mrs. Grimley why it is I come to
The Duchess so often. It isn't for anything that I take there."</p>
<p>"Oh; I didn't know. Young men when they frequent those places
generally do take something."</p>
<p>"If I had a little home of my own with the girl I love on the other
side of the fireplace, and perhaps a baby in her
<span class="nowrap">arms—"</span> Tribbledale
as he said this looked at her with all his eyes.</p>
<p>"Laws, Daniel; what things you do say!"</p>
<p>"I should never go then to any Duchess, or any Marquess of Granby, or
to any Angel." These were public-houses so named, all standing thick
together in the neighbourhood of Paradise Row. "I should not want to
go anywhere then,—except where that young woman and that baby were
to be found."</p>
<p>"Daniel, you was always fine at poetry."</p>
<p>"Try me, if it isn't real prose. The proof of the pudding's in the
eating. You come and try." By this time Clara was in his arms, and
the re-engagement was as good as made. Crocker was no doubt
dismissed,—or if not dismissed had shown himself to be unworthy.
What could be expected of a husband who could tear up a bundle of Her
Majesty's Mail papers? And then Daniel Tribbledale had exhibited a
romantic constancy which certainly deserved to be rewarded. Clara
understood that the gin-and-water had been consumed night after night
for her sake. And there were the lodgings and the clock and the
harmonium ready for the occasion. "I suppose it had better be so,
Daniel, as you wish it so much."</p>
<p>"Wish it! I have always wished it. I wouldn't change places now with
Mr. Pogson himself."</p>
<p>"He married his third wife three years ago!"</p>
<p>"I mean in regard to the whole box and dice of it. I'd rather have my
Clara with £120, than be Pogson and Littlebird with all the profits."
This gratifying assurance was rewarded, and then, considerably after
midnight, the triumphant lover took his leave.</p>
<p>Early on the following afternoon Crocker was in Paradise Row. He had
been again with Lord Hampstead, and had succeeded in worming out of
the good-natured nobleman something of the information contained in
the letter from Sir Boreas. The matter was to be left to the
Postmaster-General. Now there was an idea in the office that when a
case was left to his lordship, his lordship never proceeded to
extremities. Kings are bound to pardon if they allow themselves to be
personally concerned as to punishment. There was something of the
same feeling in regard to official discipline. As a fact the letter
from Sir Boreas had been altogether false. He had known, poor man,
that he must at last take the duty of deciding upon himself, and had
used the name of the great chief simply as a mode of escape for the
moment. But Crocker had felt that the mere statement indicated
pardon. The very delay indicated pardon. Relying upon these
indications he went to Paradise Row, dressed in his best frock coat,
with gloves in his hand, to declare to his love that the lodgings
need not be abandoned, and that the clock and harmonium might be
preserved.</p>
<p>"But you've been dismissed!" said Clara.</p>
<p>"Never! never!"</p>
<p>"It has been written in the book! 'Dismissal—B. B.!' I know the eyes
that have seen it."</p>
<p>"That's not the way they do it at all," said Crocker, who was
altogether confused.</p>
<p>"It has been written in the book, Sam; and I know that they never go
back from that."</p>
<p>"Who wrote it? Nothing has been written. There isn't a book;—not at
least like that. Tribbledale has invented it."</p>
<p>"Oh, Sam, why did you tear those papers;—Her Majesty's Mail papers?
What else was there to expect? 'Dismissal—B. B.;' Why did you do
it,—and you engaged to a young woman? No;—don't come nigh to me.
How is a young woman to go and get herself married to a young man,
and he with nothing to support her? It isn't to be thought of. When I
heard those words, 'Dismissal—B. B.,' I thought my very heart would
sink within me."</p>
<p>"It's nothing of the kind," said Crocker.</p>
<p>"What's nothing of the kind?"</p>
<p>"I ain't dismissed at all."</p>
<p>"Oh, Sam; how dare you?"</p>
<p>"I tell you I ain't. He's written a letter to Lord Hampstead, who has
always been my friend. Hampstead wasn't going to see me treated after
that fashion. Hampstead wrote, and then Æolus wrote,—that's Sir
Boreas,—and I've seen the letter,—that is, Hampstead told me what
there is in it; and I ain't to be dismissed at all. When I heard the
good news the first thing I did was to come as fast as my legs would
carry me, and tell the girl of my heart."</p>
<p>Clara did not quite believe him; but then neither had she quite
believed Tribbledale, when he had announced the dismissal with the
terrible corroboration of the great man's initials. But the crime
committed seemed to her to be so great that she could not understand
that Crocker should be allowed to remain after the perpetration of
it. Crocker's salary was £150; and, balancing the two young men
together as she had often done, though she liked the poetry of
Tribbledale, she did on the whole prefer the swagger and audacity of
Crocker. Her Majesty's Civil Service, too, had its charms for her.
The Post Office was altogether superior to Pogson and Littlebird's.
Pogson and Littlebird's hours were 9 to 5. Those of Her Majesty's
Service were much more genteel;—10 namely to 4. But what might not a
man do who had shown the nature of his disposition by tearing up
official papers? And then, though the accidents of the occasion had
enveloped her in difficulties on both sides, it seemed to her that,
at the present moment, the lesser difficulties would be encountered
by adhering to Tribbledale. She could excuse herself with Crocker.
Paradise Row had already declared that the match with Crocker must be
broken off. Crocker had indeed been told that the match was to be
broken off. When Tribbledale had come to her overnight she had felt
herself to be a free woman. When she had given way to the voice of
the charmer, when she had sunk into his arms, softened by that
domestic picture which he had painted, no pricks of conscience had
disturbed her happiness. Whether the "Dismissal—B. B." had or had
not yet been written, it was sure to come. She was as free to "wed
another" as was Venice when her Doge was deposed. She could throw
herself back upon the iniquity of the torn papers were Crocker to
complain. But should she now return to her Crocker, how could she
excuse herself with Tribbledale? "It is all over between you and me,
Sam," she said with her handkerchief up to her eyes.</p>
<p>"All over! Why should it be all over?"</p>
<p>"You was told it was all over."</p>
<p>"That was when all the Row said that I was to be dismissed. There was
something in it,—then; though, perhaps, a girl might have waited
till a fellow had got up upon his legs again."</p>
<p>"Waiting ain't so pleasant, Mr. Crocker, when a girl has to look
after herself."</p>
<p>"But I ain't dismissed at all, and there needn't be any waiting. I
thought that you would be suffering as well as me, and so I came
right away to you, all at once."</p>
<p>"So I have suffered, Sam. No one knows what I have suffered."</p>
<p>"But it'll come all right now?" Clara shook her head. "You don't mean
that Tribbledale's been and talked you over already?"</p>
<p>"I knew Mr. Tribbledale before ever I saw you, Sam."</p>
<p>"How often have I heard you call him a poor mean skunk?"</p>
<p>"Never, Crocker; never. Such a word never passed my lips."</p>
<p>"Something very like it then."</p>
<p>"I may have said he wanted sperrit. I may have said so, though I
disremember it. But if I did,—what of that?"</p>
<p>"You despised him."</p>
<p>"No, Crocker. What I despise is a man as goes and tears up Her
Majesty's Mail papers. Tribbledale never tore up anything at Pogson
and Littlebird's,—except what was to be tore. Tribbledale was never
turned out for nigh a fortnight, so that he couldn't go and show his
face in King's Head Court. Tribbledale never made hisself hated by
everybody." That unknown abominable word which Crocker had put into
her mouth had roused all the woman within her, so that she was
enabled to fight her battle with a courage which would not have come
to her aid had he been more prudent.</p>
<p>"Who hates me?"</p>
<p>"Mr. Jerningham does, and Roden, and Sir Boreas, and Bobbin." She had
learned all their names. "How can they help hating a man that tears
up the mail papers! And I hate you."</p>
<p>"Clara!"</p>
<p>"I do. What business had you to say I used that nasty word? I never
do use them words. I wouldn't even so much as look at a man who'd
demean himself to put such words as them into my mouth. So I tell you
what it is, Mr. Crocker; you may just go away. I am going to become
Daniel Tribbledale's wife, and it isn't becoming in you to stand here
talking to a young woman that is engaged to another young man."</p>
<p>"And this is to be the end of it?"</p>
<p>"If you please, Mr. Crocker."</p>
<p>"Well!"</p>
<p>"If ever you feel inclined to speak your mind to another young woman,
and you carry it as far as we did, and you wishes to hold on to her,
don't you go and tear Her Majesty's Mail papers. And when she tells
you a bit of her mind, as I did just now, don't you go and put nasty
words into her mouth. Now, if you please, you may just as well send
over that clock and that harmonium to Daniel Tribbledale, Esq.,
King's Head Court, Great Broad Street." So saying she left him, and
congratulated herself on having terminated the interview without much
unpleasantness.</p>
<p>Crocker, as he shook the dust off his feet upon leaving Paradise Row,
began to ask himself whether he might not upon the whole congratulate
himself as to the end to which that piece of business had been
brought. When he had first resolved to offer his hand to the young
lady, he had certainly imagined that that hand would not be empty.
Clara was no doubt "a fine girl," but not quite so young as she was
once. And she had a temper of her own. Matrimony, too, was often
followed by many troubles. Paradise Row would no doubt utter jeers,
but he need not go there to hear them. He was not quite sure but that
the tearing of the papers would in the long run be beneficial to him.</p>
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