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Say and Seal, Volume 1

<h3 id="id03591" style="margin-top: 3em">CHAPTER XXVIII.</h3> Faith was half ready to wish the next day might be rainy; but it rose fair and bright. She must go to walk, probably; and visiters might come. The only thing to be done was to despatch her ordinary duties as quick as possible, prepare her French exercise, and go to her teacher early. Which she did. She came in with a face as bright as the day, although a little less ready to look in everybody's eyes. There were enough things ready for her. Lessons were pressed rather more steadily than usual, perhaps because they had been neglected a little for the last two days—or hindered; and it was not till one book and another had done its work, till the exercise was copied and various figure puzzles disposed of, that Mr. Linden told her he thought a talking exercise ought to come next,—if she had one ready he should like to have the benefit of it. "You are tired, Mr. Linden!" said Faith quickly. "You may begin by giving me the grounds of that conclusion." "I don't know," she said half laughing,—"I don't see it; but that don't make me know. I was afraid you were tired with this work." "Very unsafe, Miss Faith, to build up such a superstructure upon grounds that you neither see nor know. I was immediately beginning to question the style of my own explanations this morning." "Why, sir?" "If I seem tired, said explanations may have seemed—tiresome." She looked silently, with a smile, as if questioning the possibility of his thinking so; and her answer did not go to that point. "You didn't seem tired, Mr. Linden—I had no reason for thinking so, I suppose. I was only afraid. I was going to ask you what Dr. Harrison meant last night by the angel riding upon a sunbeam? I saw you knew what he meant." Mr. Linden got up and went for a book—then came back to his couch again. "Precisely what Dr. Harrison meant, Miss Faith, I should not like to say. What he referred to, was a part of Paradise Lost, where the angels set to guard the earth have a messenger. 'Thither came Uriel, gliding through the even On a sunbeam, swift as a shooting star.'" "Who is Uriel? an angel?" "Yes. He is called, 'The archangel Uriel, one of the seven Who in God's presence, nearest to his throne, Stand ready at his command, and are his eyes. That run through all the heavens, or down to the earth, Bear his swift errands over moist and dry, O'er sea and land.'" Faith listened, evidently with a pleased ear. "But I suppose the angel could come as well without the sunbeam as with it?" "I suppose so!" he said smiling. "In my belief, angels go where the sunbeams do not. But Milton chose to name Uriel as the special regent of the sun, and so passing to and fro on its rays." "What do you mean by 'regent,' Mr. Linden?" "A regent is one appointed to rule in place of the king." "But that don't seem to me true, Mr. Linden," said Faith after a little meditation. "What, and why?" Faith blushed at finding herself 'in for it,' but went on. "I don't suppose the sun wants anybody to rule it or to take care of it, under its Maker?" "Yet it may please him to have guardian spirits there as well as here,—about that we know not. In the Revelation, you know, an angel is spoken of as 'standing in the sun,' and from that Milton took his idea. Part of the description is very beautiful, at least;— 'So spake the false dissembler unperceived; For neither man nor angel can discern Hypocrisy, the only evil that walks Invisible, except to God alone, By his permissive will, through heaven and earth. And oft though wisdom wake, suspicion sleeps At wisdom's gate, and to simplicity Resigns her charge, while goodness thinks no ill, Where no ill seems: which now for once beguiled Uriel, though regent of the sun, and held The sharpest sighted spirit of all in heaven.'" "Who is the person spoken of in the first line, Mr. Linden?" "Satan—applying to Uriel for guidance to the new created earth and its inhabitants, on the same plea that Herod presented to the wise men." "But that's a story?" said Faith. "Yes. The Bible only tells the work done by him after he got here." "Mr. Linden, will you read that over once more for me." She listened with a face of absorbed intentness while it was read; then looked away from the book with an unconscious but very audible sigh. "Well?" Mr. Linden said, smiling as he looked at her. "I like it very much!" was Faith's answer. "Is that what made you sigh?" "Sigh!" she said starting a little and colouring. "No,—I didn't mean to sigh." "The fact is more than the intention. Whence came that?" "It was only—Please don't ask me, Mr. Linden. I can't tell you." He made no answer to that, but turning over the leaves read to her here and there without much comment,—then asked her if she was tired of hearing about angels. "I think I should never be tired!" said Faith. "But you must be, Mr. Linden. Please," she said putting her hand gently on the book,—"don't read for me any more. Is all the book like that?" "Not quite all—I have given you some bits that I particularly like, but there is much more. You need not be uneasy about my being tired," he said smiling; "if I were, by your own shewing I can have rest. However, Miss Faith—lessons being the order of the day—will you read French to me?" In her reading, Faith came to the description of the philosopher's perplexity in finding that the birds would not pick up the crumbs he threw to them on the roof as usual. He concluded the feathered things were not more reason able than mankind, and had taken fright for nothing. "J'allais fermer ma fenêtre sur cette réflexion, quand j'aperçois tout à coup, dans l'espace lumineux qui s'étend à droite, l'ombre de deux oreilles qui se dressent, puis une griffe qui s'avance, puis la tête d'un chat tigré qui se montre à l'angle de la gouttière. Le drôle était là en embuscade, espérant que les aniettes lui amèneraient du gibier. "Et moi qui accusais la couardise de mes hôtes! J'étais sûr qu'aucun danger ne les menaçait! je croyais avoir bien regardé partout! je n'avais oublié que le coin derrière moi! "Dans la vie comme sur les toits, que de malheurs arrivent pour avoir oublié un seul coin!" Faith closed the book then, very much amused with the philosopher's "chat tigré." "But often one can't see round the corner," she remarked. A little gesture of lips and brow, half asserted that if one could not, one could: but Mr. Linden only said, "Most true! Miss Faith. Nevertheless, the knowledge that there are corners is not to be despised." "I don't know. I shouldn't like to live always in fear of seeing the shadow of a cat's ears come in." "Have you quite outgrown the love of cats?" said Mr. Linden smiling. "No, but I was talking of the fear of corners," she said with an answering smile. "I don't think I want to remember the corners, Mr. Linden." "I don't think I want you should. Philosophers and birds, you know, go through the world on different principles." She laughed a little at that, gave the hearth a parting brush, and went off to dinner. Business claimed its place after dinner, business of a less pleasant kind, quite up to the time when Faith must put on her bonnet to walk with Dr. Harrison. Faith had no great mind to the walk, but she couldn't help finding it pleasant. The open air was very sweet and bracing; the exercise was inspiriting, and the threatened talk went well with both. There was nothing whatever formidable about it; the words and thoughts seemed to play, like the sunlight, on anything that came in their way. Dr. Harrison knew how to make a walk or a talk pleasant, even to Faith, it seemed. Whatever she had at any time seen in him that she did not like, was out of sight; pleasant, gentle, intelligent, grave, he was constantly supplying ear and mind with words and things that were worth the having. Probably he had discovered her eager thirst for knowledge; for he furnished her daintily with bits of many a kind, from his own stores which were large. She did not know there was any design in this; she knew only that the steps were taken very easily in that walk. So pleasant it was that Faith was in no haste to turn, in no mood to quicken her pace. But something else was on her mind,—and must come out. "Dr. Harrison,"—she said when they were in a quiet part of the way, with nobody near, "may I speak to you about something?—that perhaps you won't like?" "You can speak of nothing I should not like—to hear," he said with gentle assurance. "Dr. Harrison—" said Faith, speaking as if the recollection touched her,—"when you and I were thrown out in that meadow the other day and came so near losing our lives—if the almost had been quite, if we had both been killed,—I should have been safe and well, I believe.—How would it have been with you?" Dr. Harrison looked at her. "If I had gone in your company," he said, "I think it would hardly have been ill with me." "Do you know so little as that?"—she said, in such a tone of sorrow and pity as might have suited one of the 'ministering spirits' she had been likened to. "I don't think I am as good as you are," the doctor said with a face not unmoved. "Good!" said Faith. "What do you mean by goodness, Dr. Harrison?" "I shall have the worst of it if I try to go into definitions again," he said smiling. "I think you will find what I mean, in consulting your own thoughts." "Goodness?" said Faith again. "Do you remember the silver scale-armour of that Lepisma, Dr. Harrison? That is perfection. That is what God means by goodness—not the outside things that every eye, or your own, can see;—but when the far-down, far-back thoughts and imaginations of your heart will bear such looking at and be found faultless! Less than that, God will not take from you, if you are going to heaven by your own goodness." He looked at her. They had changed sides; and as fearless now as he, she was the speaker, and he had little to say. "I don't know much about these things, Miss Faith," he answered soberly. "I don't know much, Dr. Harrison," she said humbly. "But think what you were near the other day." "I don't know!"—said he, as if making a clean breast of it. She paused. "Dr. Harrison, will a wise man leave such a matter in uncertainty?" "I am not wise," said he. "I am ignorant—in this." "You know you need not remain so." "That is not so certain! I have seen so much—of what you have seen so little, my dear Miss Derrick, that you can scarce understand how light the weight of most people's testimony is to me." "But there is the testimony of one higher," said Faith. "There is God's own word?" "I don't know it." "Won't you know it, sir?" "I will do anything you ask me in that voice," he said smiling at her. "But after all one reads people and people's professions, miss Faith;—and they make the first impression." "I dare say it is often not true," said Faith sadly. "You are true," said he; "and you may say to me what you will, on this subject or any other, and I will believe it." They walked a little distance in silence. "What are you thinking of?" said the doctor in a very gentle accent of inquiry. "I am sorry—very sorry for you, Dr. Harrison." "Why?" said he taking her hand. "Because it seems to me you are not caring in earnest about this matter." He kissed the hand, without asking permission. But it was done with a grateful warm expression of feeling. "I will do whatever you tell me to do!" he said. How Faith wished she could send him to another adviser! But that she could not. "Tell me," he repeated. "I will do it." The look and tone were earnest, moved, and warm; she had hardly seen the like in Dr. Harrison before. "Then, Dr. Harrison, I wish you would read the Bible, with the determination to do what you find there you ought." "I will," he said smiling. "And if I get into difficulty you must help me." The rest of the way was extremely pleasant, after that; only it seemed to Faith that they met all the world! First there was Cecilia Deacon, whose eyes took good note, she thought, of both the walkers from head to foot. Then they met at intervals every one of Faith's Sunday school scholars; for every one of whom she had a glad greeting and word which she must stop for, somewhat to the doctor's amused edification. Miss Bezac happened, of all people, to be going up street when they were going down; and her eyes looked rather with some wistful gravity upon the pair, for all her pleasant nods to both. Then Mrs. Somers. "Well I think you are Faith!"—was her brisk remark,—"or faith_less_—which is it? Julius, I heard a remarkable story about you yesterday." "Aunt Ellen—I like to hear remarkable stories. Especially about anything remarkable." "Well this isn't one of that sort," said Mrs. Somers. "I am sure you said—However, let's have it, of any sort." "I heard you had your pocket picked of a good opportunity," said Mrs. Somers. "Does Mr. Linden expect to be out next week, Faith?" "I believe Dr. Harrison will not let him, Mrs. Somers." A little unverbalized sound answered that, and Mrs. Somers said good evening and walked on. Faith thought that was the end, as they were near her own door. But Dr. Harrison followed her in; and entering the sitting-room, Faith found that her meetings were not over. There was no less a person than Mrs. Stoutenburgh, and there also, regaling her eyes and ears, were Mrs. Derrick and Mr. Linden. Mrs. Stoutenburgh was a fair, pretty, curly-haired woman, a good deal younger than the Squire, intensely devoted to her own family, and very partial to Mr. Linden—whom she had taken under her wing (figuratively) from his first coming to Pattaquasset. The first sound Faith heard as she opened the door was Mrs. Stoutenburgh's merry laugh at some remark of his—then the lady jumped up and came towards her. "My dear Faith, how do you do?—Dr. Harrison—I half said I would never speak to you again! Faith, how can you trust yourself with him for one minute?" "Mrs. Stoutenburgh," said the doctor,—"I half thought I would shoot myself!" "I guess that's as near as you'll come to it, on purpose," said Mrs. Stoutenburgh. "You needn't think I shall forget it—whenever I want Faith to come and see me I shall tell Mr. Linden to bring her. He's safe—or supposed to be," she added laughingly. "I hope that's as near to it as I shall ever come on purpose, or otherwise, Mrs. Stoutenburgh!" said the doctor. "I think you should judge me safer than Mr. Linden,—as appearances go." "Squire Deacon used to tell very hard stories of him when he first came," said the lady—"and I have heard a report or two since. I do love to talk to him about it!—he always looks so grave, I think he likes it." The laugh was mutual, whether the delight was or no. "Who is Squire Deacon?" said the doctor. "I should like to make his acquaintance." Faith took off her bonnet, and then pulled off her gloves, deliberately, and bestowed them on the table. "O he's a Pattaquasseter," said Mrs. Stoutenburgh—"haven't you seen his sister? She admires you—more than I think she need," she added mischievously. "But the Squire's been away for awhile,—he just got home this afternoon." Faith had recourse to the fire. The doctor came round, took the tongs from her and did the work; after which he took a somewhat succinct leave of the assembly. "By the way, Linden," he said pausing by his chair a moment,—"I expect to be in Quilipeak for a few days—I am very sorry, but I must. You won't want me, I think. Limbre can do all that is necessary. I shall see you Monday or Tuesday again." "Doctor!" said Mrs. Stoutenburgh—"I want you to take me home. Mr. Stoutenburgh always makes such a fuss if I'm out after dark and don't bring anybody home to tea, that I never dare do it." "Will you trust yourself with me, Mrs. Stoutenburgh?" said the doctor standing in comical doubt. "Just wait a minute," said Mrs. Stoutenburgh, as she went round with her pretty, free, womanly manner, and laid her hand on Mr. Linden's forehead and hands, just as if he had been one of her own boys. "I tell you what—I don't think you cure him up half fast enough among you. If I had him up at my house I'd take better care of him." "No, Mrs. Stoutenburgh, even you could not do that," he said looking up at her. She stood still a moment. "You shouldn't look at me so," she said,—"I shall go home and feel real bad for all the nonsense I've been talking. You know," she added, with the mischievous look coming back, "I never did believe one word of it—except—" and the sentence was finished softly. "Now I'm ready, doctor—O Faith, I had a message for you, but Mr. Linden will tell you. Good-bye. No, doctor—I'm not going to trust myself with you,—you're going to trust yourself with me." Dr. Harrison was for once quiet, and went off without a repartee. Other eyes looked with a different anxiety at Mr. Linden then, and another voice, more grave as well as more timid, asked, at his side, "Are you not so well to-night, Mr. Linden?" He smiled, and gave her his hand by way of answer, before he spoke. "I think I am, Miss Faith—you know Mrs. Stoutenburgh has not seen me before since I was quite well." She brought both hands to test the feeling of his, for an instant, without speaking. "Mr. Linden, I heard what Dr. Harrison said—Don't you think I can do instead of Dr. Limbre?" "Yes, Miss Faith—if you will be so good," he answered without hesitation and with the simplest tone and manner. Her brow lightened immediately; and happy and quiet as usual, and that was very happy, she began to make her preparations for tea, clearing the table and rolling it to its last night's position. In which last operation she had assistance. Then she went off for her tea—and the lamp and the fire-light shone again presently on the pleasant scene of last night. "Don't you want to hear your message, Miss Faith?" Mr. Linden said. "Yes, but I wasn't in a hurry, Mr. Linden. I supposed it would come." "It is in three parts. The first is nothing new; being merely that the birthday of the young heir of the house of Stoutenburgh occurs on the 29th of November. Whether the second part is new, I—being a stranger—cannot tell; but the day is to be graced with various suitable festivities." "It's all new to me," said Faith laughing. "Of the novelty of the third part you also must judge," said Mr. Linden with a smile. "The aforesaid young heir will consider the festivities entirely incomplete without your presence—nay, will perhaps refuse to have his birthday come at all, and wish that these 'happy returns' had never had a beginning." Faith's laugh came with its full merry roll now, and she withal coloured a little. "What must I do then, Mr. Linden?" "I generally incline to the merciful side, Miss Faith—I believe I should advise you to go. Then I, not having such power in my hands, may not appreciate its fascinations." "Such power? As what, Mr. Linden?" "I ought in conscience to tell you—" he went on without answering her,—"it has been on my mind ever since, that the other night"—and the look was grave for a minute—"the trophy of a broken rosebud was picked up where you fell. And I had not the heart to reclaim it, Miss Faith," Mr. Linden said, with a submissive air of confession. She looked at him with the prettiest look in the world, of grave, only half conscious enquiry; and then the lost rosebud was more than replaced in her cheeks. "That is the state of the case," Mr. Linden said, as gravely as if both rosebuds had been out of sight and mind, "but your mother refuses to go. And it seems that I also am wanted on the 29th; so if you please, Miss Faith, I will try to see that you make the journey both ways in safety." "I should like to go," said Faith quietly. "They are pleasant people." The tea things were withdrawn, and Cindy was no more needed there, and Mrs. Derrick also had gone into the other part of the house to attend to some business. Faith stood before the fire looking meditatively into it. "I wish," she said slowly and soberly,—"Dr. Harrison would please to talk to you instead of to me, Mr. Linden!" "Talk to me?" Mr. Linden repeated, looking at her. "About professions?" "No indeed!" said Faith, first astonished and then smiling,—"I mean very different things. About religion, and what he thinks of it?" Rather soberly the words were received, and soberly answered, not at once. "Do not let him say much to you on that last point, Miss Faith." "How can I help it, Mr. Linden?" she said instantly. "Forbid him, if need be. If he asks for information, and you choose to give it, that is one thing,—you are not obliged to hear all the skeptical views and arguments with which he is furnished. Your statement of the truth has nothing to do with the grounds of his unbelief." "But—" Faith got no further. She stood thinking of that afternoon's talk, and of the certain possible hindrances to her following such advice. "I am talking a little in the dark, you know," Mr. Linden said,—"I am only supposing what he may say and ask you to say; and I do not think much of such conversation between any parties. Press home the truth—and like David's pebble it may do its work; but in a fencing match David might have found it harder to maintain his ground. And his overthrow would not have touched the truth of his cause, nor perhaps his own faith—yet the Philistine would have triumphed." "Thank you, Mr. Linden," she said with a grateful smile. "That is just the truth. But, do you think Dr. Harrison is—exactly a Philistine?" "Not in all respects," he said smiling. "What do you mean by a Philistine?" "I thought you put him in the place of that Philistine," she said. "Yes, for the illustration. But I do not know him to be strictly a champion of unbelief, although he avows himself on that side. His conversations with me have left me uncertain how far he would go." Faith was silent and looked thoughtful. "Have I touched any of your difficulties? May I hear any more?" "No—" she said. "I believe you have said all you can say. And it is good for me." "I have not said all I could say, but it is not easy for me to talk to you about it at all. You see, Miss Faith," said Mr. Linden smiling, "there cannot be such an anomaly in nature as a philosophical bird—so what am I to do?" Faith smiled a little and thought that as long as he gave her the benefit of his philosophy, it did not much matter. Which recondite view of the subject she did not put into words. The days began to roll on smoothly once more, subsiding into their old uneventful flow. The flow of talk indeed had not quite subsided; but as nothing came to throw any light on the point of the unknown sportsman who chose his sport so strangely, curiosity took a modified, condensed form; and the whole matter was stowed away in people's minds as the one Pattaquasset mystery. Happy Pattaquasset! Even Mr. Linden's protracted confinement to the house made little difference to most, he had been so little seen when he was able to be out: only the boys had had his daylight hours; and where he had spent those times of twilight and evening when he was not at home, no one knew but the poor unknown class who mourned his absence as they had blessed his presence, in secret. The boys were not silent,—but they had the indemnification of going to see him, and of watching—or sleeping—in his room at night, according to their various dispositions. There came all his scholars on Sunday,—met by Faith on her contrary way; there came the whole school by turns, and at all hours. Indeed when once the embargo upon visiters was taken off, the supply was great!—and without careful measures on the part of Mr. Linden, French exercises would have been put aside with a witness. But he made two or three rules, and carried them out. In the first place he would see nobody before dinner, except the doctor; nor anybody after tea, save the same privileged individual. In the second place, when he was able to be out of his room without too much fatigue, the lessons were carried on down stairs,—in the dining-room generally, as being more private. There could both parties come and go without observation; and often when Mrs. Derrick was entertaining a roomful, a sudden fall of the thin partition would have revealed the very people they were discussing, deep in some pretty point of information. Pretty those lessons were! Faith's steps,—arithmetical, geographical, or what other,—were swift, steady, and sure; herself indefatigable, her teacher no less. If Mr. Linden had not quite come to be in her eyes "an old school book," she was yet enough accustomed to his teaching and animadversions to merge the binding in the book; and as to him, she might have been one of his school boys, for the straightforward way in which he opened paths of knowledge and led her through. The leading was more careful of her strength, more respectful of her timidity,—was more strictly leading than pushing,—that was all. Of course in two weeks, or even in four, the best of teachers and scholars could make but a beginning; but that was well made, and the work went steadily on from thence—despite "teaching all day," despite the various other calls for time and strength. And Faith was as docile and obedient as Johnny Fax himself, and as far as those qualities went, very much in the same way. If the denial of Phil's information and Mr. Linden's manner the day after her overturn, had raised a doubt as to the real abstractness of his regard for her, Faith's modesty and simplicity put the thought well into the background. She did not care to look at it or bring it up; in the full, happy, peaceful hours she was enjoying she had enough, for the present; and so Faith went on very much after her old fashion. A little quieter, perhaps, when not called out of it; a little shyer of even innocently putting herself forward; but in speech or action, speaking and acting with her wonted free simplicity. The only breaks in these weeks were one or two visits to Mrs. Custers, and the doctor's comings and goings. He could not be shut out. The Monday evening after the doctor's absence at Quilipeak, the little party were as usual in the sitting-room; and a pretty chapter of Physical Geography was in process of reading and talk, when the doctor's quick wheels at the door announced not only his return but his arrival. And Mr. Linden announced to his scholar, that it was needful now to return to the surface of the earth and attend to the flow of conversation—and to put the book in his pocket. "Are you glad to see me back?" said the doctor as he took the hand of his patient. He looked rather glad himself. "If I say yes, that will be to confess that I have reason. You perceive my dilemma," Mr. Linden said, but with a smile that was certainly as kind and trustworthy as any the doctor had seen since he went away. "Do you mean—that you have no reason to be glad?" said Dr. Harrison slowly, eying the smile and giving it, to judge by his own, a trustful regard. "Certainly not! It's a comfort to have somebody at hand who is ready to fight me at any moment," said Mr. Linden. "What have you been doing since I went away?" "Reading, writing, and considering the world generally." "From this Pattaquasset centre!" "Why not?—if lines meet and make it one." "How do you get the ends of the lines in your hands!" said the doctor. "A centre, I feel it to be—but very like the centre of the earth—socially and politically. You see, I have just emerged to the surface, and come down again. Who has taken care of you?" "I feel quite equal to the task of taking care of myself, thank you, doctor." "You don't mean to say, man, you have dressed your arm yourself?" "What do you suppose my powers are equal to?" "That is a matter," said the doctor, "upon which I stand in doubt—which gives me an uncomfortable, troublesome sort of feeling when I am in your presence. It must be superstition. I suppose I shall get the better of it—or of you!—in time. Meanwhile, who has dressed your arm for you?" The answer was given very quietly, very simply, not very loud. "The lady whom you had the honour of instructing in the art, Dr. Harrison." "Did you do it well?" said Dr. Harrison somewhat comically, wheeling round before Faith. She was a contrast; as her face looked up at him, rather pleased, and her soft voice answered,—"I think I did, sir." "I don't doubt you did! And I don't doubt you would do anything. Are you preparing to be another Portia? And am I to be Bellario?" "I don't know what you mean, Dr. Harrison." "Do you know the story of Portia?—in the Merchant of Venice?" "I never read it." "She was a dangerous character," said the doctor. "Portia, Miss Derrick, wishing to save not the life but the character and happiness of a—But what a way this is to tell you the story! Is there a Shakspeare here?" "We haven't it," said Faith quietly. "I'll bring the play the next time I come, if you will allow me," he said sitting down by her;—"and indoctrinate you in something more interesting than my first lesson. How shall I thank you for doing my work for me?" "It became my work." "I am in your debt nevertheless—more than you can know without being one of my profession. I have some thing that I wish to submit to your inspection, and to take your advice upon, too. It will be fit to be seen, I hope, by the day after to-morrow. If I could I would bring it here—but as that is not possible—Will you go to see it?" "Where is it?" "Not far; but it will cost you the taking of a few steps." Faith declared she had hardly time to go to see anything; but was obliged finally to yield to persuasion, and Thursday was the day fixed. The thing, whatever it was, however, was not ready when the day came, and the exhibition was put off indefinitely. <div style="break-after:column;"></div>

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