<h2><SPAN name="THE_LAST_STRAW" id="THE_LAST_STRAW"></SPAN>THE LAST STRAW</h2>
<h3>XIII.</h3>
<p><span style="margin-left: 26.5em;">"Thou in justice,</span><br/>
<span style="margin-left: 14em;">If from the height of majesty we can</span><br/>
<span style="margin-left: 14em;">Look down upon thy lowness and embrace it,</span><br/>
<span style="margin-left: 14em;">Art bound with fervour to look up to me."</span><br/>
<br/>
<span style="margin-left: 21em;"><span class="smcap">Massinger</span>, <i>Roman Actor.</i></span><br/><br/></p>
<p>Haggard and distraught was Leander as he went about his business that
morning, so mechanically that one customer, who had requested to have
his luxuriant locks "trimmed," found himself reduced to a state of penal
bullet-headedness before he could protest, and another sacrificed his
whiskers and part of one ear to the hairdresser's uninspired scissors.
For Leander's eyes were constantly turning to the front part of his
shop, where his apprentice might come in at any moment with the answer
to his appeal.</p>
<p>At last the moment came when the bell fixed at the door sounded sharply,
and he saw the sleek head and chubby red face he had been so anxiously
expecting. He was busy with a customer; but that could not detain him
then, and he rushed quickly into the outer shop. "Well, William," he
said, breathlessly, "a nice time you've been over that message! I gave
you the money for your 'bus."</p>
<p>"Yusser, but it was this way: you said a green 'bus,<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_237" id="Page_237">[Pg 237]</SPAN></span> and I took a green
'bus with 'Bayswater' on it, and I didn't know nothing was wrong, and
when it stopped I sez to the conductor, 'This ain't Kensington
Gardings;' and he sez, 'No, it's Archer Street;' and I sez——"</p>
<p>"Never mind that now; you got to the shop, didn't you?"</p>
<p>"Yes, I got to the shop, sir, and I see the lady; but I sez to that
conductor, 'You should ha' told me,' I sez——"</p>
<p>"Did she give you anything for me?" interrupted Leander, impatiently.</p>
<p>"Yessur," said the boy.</p>
<p>"Then where the dooce is it?"</p>
<p>"'Ere!" said William, and brought out an envelope, which his master tore
open with joy. It contained his own letter!</p>
<p>"William," he said unsteadily, "is this all?"</p>
<p>"Ain't it enough, sir?" said the young scoundrel, who had guessed the
state of affairs, and felt an impish satisfaction at his employer's
rejection.</p>
<p>"None of that, William; d'ye hear me?" said Leander. "William, I ain't
been a bad master to you. Tell me, how did she take it?"</p>
<p>"Well, she didn't seem to want to take it nohow at first," said the boy.
"I went up to the desk where she was a-sittin' and gave it her, and
by-and-by she opened it with the tips of her fingers, as if it would
bite, and read it all through very careful, and I could see her nose
going up gradual, and her colour coming, and then she sez to me, 'You
may go now, boy; there's no answer.' And I sez to her, 'If you please,
miss, master said as I was not to go away without a answer.' So she sez,
uncommon short and stiff, 'In that case he shall have it!'—like that,
she says, as proud as a queen, and she scribbles<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_238" id="Page_238">[Pg 238]</SPAN></span> a line or two on it,
and throws it to me, and goes on casting up figgers."</p>
<p>"A line or two! where?" cried Leander, and caught up the letter again.
Yes, there on the last page was Matilda's delicate commercial
handwriting, and the poor man read the cruel words, "<i>I have nothing to
advise; I give you up to your 'goddess'!</i>"</p>
<p>"Very well, William," he said, with a deadly calm; "that's all. You
young devil! what are you a-sniggering at?" he added, with a sudden
outburst.</p>
<p>"On'y something I 'eard a boy say in the street, sir, going along, sir;
nothing to do with you, sir."</p>
<p>"Oh, youth, youth!" muttered the poor broken man; "boys don't grow
feelings, any more than they grow whiskers!"</p>
<p>And he went back to his saloon, where he was instantly hailed with
reproaches from the abandoned customer.</p>
<p>"Look here, sir! what do you mean by this? I told you I wanted to be
shaved, and you've soaped the top of my head and left it to cool!
What"—and he made use of expletives here—"what are you about?"</p>
<p>Leander apologized on the ground of business of a pressing nature, but
the customer was not pacified.</p>
<p>"Business, sir! your business is <i>here</i>: <i>I'm</i> your business! And I come
to be shaved, and you soap the top of my head, and leave me all alone to
dry! It's scandalous! it's——"</p>
<p>"Look here, sir," interrupted Leander, gloomily; "I've a good deal of
private trouble to put up with just now, without having <i>you</i> going on
at me; so I must ask you not to 'arris me like this, or I don't know
what I might do, with a razor so 'andy!"</p>
<p>"That'll do!" said the customer, hastily. "I—I<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_239" id="Page_239">[Pg 239]</SPAN></span> don't care about being
shaved this morning. Wipe my head, and let me go; no, I'll wipe it
myself,—don't you trouble!" and he made for the door. "It's my belief,"
he said, pausing on the threshold for an instant, "that you're a
dangerous lunatic, sir; you ought to be shut up!"</p>
<p>"I dessay I shall have a mad doctor down on me after this," thought
Leander; "but I shan't wait for <i>him</i>. No, it is all over now; the die
is fixed! Cruel Tillie! you have spoke the mandrake; you have thrust me
into the stony harms of that 'eathen goddess—always supposing the
police don't nip in fust, and get the start of her."</p>
<p>No more customers came that day, which was fortunate, perhaps, for them.
The afternoon passed, and dusk approached, but the hairdresser sat on,
motionless, in his darkening saloon, without the energy to light a
single gas-jet.</p>
<p>At last he roused himself sufficiently to go to the head of the stairs
leading to his "labatry," and call for William, who, it appeared, was
composing an egg-wash, after one of his employer's formulæ, and came up,
wondering to find the place in darkness.</p>
<p>"Come here, William," said Leander, solemnly. "I just want a few words
with you, and then you can go. I can do the shutting-up myself. William,
we can none of us foretell the future; and it may so 'appen that you are
looking on my face for the last time. If it should so be, William,
remember the words I am now about to speak, and lay them to 'art!...
This world is full of pitfalls; and some of us walk circumspect and keep
out of 'em, and some of us, William—some of us don't. If there's any
places more abounding in pitfalls than what others are, it is the
noxious localities known under the deceitful appellation of 'pleasure'
gardens. And you<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_240" id="Page_240">[Pg 240]</SPAN></span> may take that as the voice of one calling to you from
the bottom of about as deep a 'ole as a mortal man ever plumped into.
And if ever you find a taste for statuary growing on you, William, keep
it down, wrastle with it, and don't encourage it. Farewell, William! Be
here at the usual time to-morrow, though whether you will find <i>me</i> here
is more than I can say."</p>
<p>The boy went away, much impressed by so elaborate and formal a parting,
which seemed to him a sign that, in his parlance, "the guv'nor was going
to make a bolt of it."</p>
<p>Leander busied himself in some melancholy preparations for his impending
departure, dissolution, or incarceration; he was not very clear which it
might be.</p>
<p>He went down and put his "labatry" in order. There he had worked with
all the fiery zeal of an inventor at the discoveries which were to
confer perpetual youth, in various sized bottles, upon a grateful world.
He must leave them all, with his work scarcely begun! Another would step
in and perfect what he had left incomplete!</p>
<p>He came up again, with a heavy heart, and examined his till. There was
not much; enough, however, for William's wages and any small debts. He
made a list of these, and left it there with the coin. "They must settle
it among themselves," he thought, wearily; "I can't be bothered with
business now."</p>
<p>He was thinking whether it was worth while to shut the shop up or not;
when a clear voice sounded from above—</p>
<p>"Leander, where art thou? Come hither!"</p>
<p>And he started as if he had been shot. "I'm coming, madam," he called
up, obsequiously. "I'll be with you in one minute!"<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_241" id="Page_241">[Pg 241]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>"Now for it," he thought, as he went up to his sitting-room. "I wish I
wasn't all of a twitter. I wish I knew what was coming next!"</p>
<p>The room was dark, but when he got a light he saw the statue standing in
the centre of the room, her hood thrown back, and the fur-lined mantle
hanging loosely about her; the face looked stern and terrible under its
brilliant tint.</p>
<p>"Have you made your choice?" she demanded.</p>
<p>"Choice!" he said. "I haven't any choice left me!"</p>
<p>"It is true," she said triumphantly. "Your friends have deserted you;
mortals are banded together to seize and disgrace you: you have no
refuge but with me. But time is short. Come, then, place yourself within
the shelter of these arms, and, while they enfold you tight in their
marble embrace, repeat after me the words which complete my power."</p>
<p>"There's no partickler hurry," he objected. "I will directly. I—I only
want to know what will happen when I've done it. You can't have any
objection to a natural curiosity like that."</p>
<p>"You will lose consciousness, to recover it in balmy Cyprus, with
Aphrodite (no longer cold marble, but the actual goddess, warm and
living), by your side! Ah! impervious one, can you linger still? Do you
not tremble with haste to feel my breath fanning your cheek, my soft arm
around your neck? Are not your eyes already dazzled by the gleam of my
golden tresses?"</p>
<p>"Well, I can't say they are; not at present," said Leander. "And, you
see, it's all very well; but, as I asked you once before, how are you
going to <i>get</i> me there? It's a long way, and I'm ten stone, if I'm an
ounce!"<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_242" id="Page_242">[Pg 242]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>"Heavy-witted youth, it is not your body that will taste perennial
bliss."</p>
<p>"And what's to become of that, then?" he asked, anxiously.</p>
<p>"That will be left here, clasped to this stone, itself as cold and
lifeless."</p>
<p>"Oh!" said Leander, "I didn't bargain for that, and I don't like it."</p>
<p>"You will know nothing of it; you will be with me, in dreamy grottoes
strewn with fragrant rushes and the new-stript leaves of the vine, where
the warm air woos to repose with its languorous softness, and the water
as it wells murmurs its liquid laughter. Ah! no Greek would have
hesitated thus."</p>
<p>"Well, I ain't a Greek; and, as a business man, you can't be surprised
if I want to make sure it's a genuine thing, and worth the risk, before
I commit myself. I think I understand that it's the gold ring which is
to bind us two together?"</p>
<p>"It is," she said; "by that pure and noble metal are we united."</p>
<p>"Well," said Leander, "that being so, I should wish to have it tested,
else there might be a hitch somewhere or other."</p>
<p>"Tested!" she cried; "what is that?"</p>
<p>"Trying it, to see if it's real gold or not," he said. "We can easily
have it done."</p>
<p>"It is needless," she replied, haughtily. "I will not suffer my power to
be thus doubted, nor that of the pure and precious metal through which I
have obtained it!"</p>
<p>Leander might have objected to this as an example of that obscure feat,
"begging the question;" for, whether the metal <i>was</i> pure and precious,
was precisely the point he desired to ascertain. And this desire was
quite<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_243" id="Page_243">[Pg 243]</SPAN></span> genuine; for, though he saw no other course before him but that
upon which the goddess insisted, he did wish to take every reasonable
precaution.</p>
<p>"For all I know," he reasoned in his own mind, "if there's anything
wrong with that ring, I may be left 'igh and dry, halfway to Cyprus; or
she may get tired of me, and turn me out of those grottoes of hers! If I
must go with her, I should like to make things as safe as I could."</p>
<p>"It won't take long," he pleaded; "and if I find the ring's real gold, I
promise I won't hold out any longer."</p>
<p>"There is no time," she said, "to indulge this whim. Would you mock me,
Leander? Ha! did I not say so? Listen!"</p>
<p>The private bell was ringing loudly. Leander rushed to the window, but
saw no one. Then he heard the clang of the shop bell, as if the person
or persons had discovered that an entrance was possible there.</p>
<p>"The guards!" said the statue. "Will you wait for them, Leander?"</p>
<p>"No!" he cried. "Never mind what I said about the ring; I'll risk that.
Only—only, don't go away without me.... Tell me what to say, and I'll
say it, and chance the consequences!"</p>
<p>"Say, 'Aphrodite, daughter of Olympian Zeus, I yield; I fulfil the
pledge; I am thine!'"</p>
<p>"Well," he thought, "here goes. Oh, Matilda, you're responsible for
this!" And he advanced towards the white extended arms of the goddess.
There were hasty steps outside; another moment and the door would be
burst open.</p>
<p>"Aphrodite, daughter of——" he began, and recoiled suddenly; for he
heard his name called from without in a voice familiar and once dear to
him.</p>
<p>"Leander, where are you? It's all dark! Speak to<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_246" id="Page_246">[Pg 246]</SPAN></span><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_245" id="Page_245">[Pg 245]</SPAN></span><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_244" id="Page_244">[Pg 244]</SPAN></span> me; tell me you've
done nothing rash! Oh, Leander, it's Matilda!"</p>
<p>That voice, which a short while back he would have given the world to
hear once more, appalled him now. For if she came in, the goddess would
discover who she was, and then—he shuddered to think what might happen
then!</p>
<p>Matilda's hand was actually on the door. "Stop where you are!" he
shouted, in despair; "for mercy's sake, don't come in!"</p>
<div class="figcenter"><SPAN name="STOP" id="STOP"></SPAN> <ANTIMG src="images/ill-p237.jpg" width-obs="351" height-obs="500" alt=""STOP WHERE YOU ARE!... FOR MERCY'S SAKE, DON'T COME IN!"" title="" /> <span class="caption">"STOP WHERE YOU ARE!... FOR MERCY'S SAKE, DON'T COME IN!"</span></div>
<p>"Ah! you are there, and alive!" she cried. "I am not too late; and I
<i>will</i> come in!"</p>
<p>And in another instant she burst into the room, and stood there, her
tear-stained face convulsed with the horror of finding him in such
company.<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_248" id="Page_248">[Pg 248]</SPAN></span><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_247" id="Page_247">[Pg 247]</SPAN></span></p>
<hr style="width: 65%;" /><p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_249" id="Page_249">[Pg 249]</SPAN></span></p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_250" id="Page_250">[Pg 250]</SPAN></span></p>
<div style="break-after:column;"></div><br />