Bizarre

<h2><SPAN name="SIMILE" id="SIMILE">SIMILE</SPAN></h2> <p>Mortimer was as bold as orange-and-pink hosiery, and Simile was as elusive as a cake of castile soap. When, at the appointed hour, he repaired to her house, as punctual as a bill collector, she tried, like a street-car conductor, to put him off.</p> <p>But his mind, like the face of a cutie, was made up. Becoming as eloquent as a man in a telephone booth which you are waiting to use, he said: "Simile, I love you!"</p> <p>Her lips quivered like a ford, but the look in her eyes was as far away as Brooklyn.</p> <p>"Ah, marry me" he pleaded, his voice sounding as hollow as a campaign pledge, "&mdash;or I shall be as wretched as porous custard."</p> <p>He edged nearer to her, till he was almost as close as the air in the subway. He gazed anxiously at her face, the way a person in a taxicab gazes at the face of the meter. Her skin was smooth as a confidence man and clear as boarding-house soup. He put his arm about<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_34" id="Page_34">[Pg 34]</SPAN></span> her slender waist, which was slim as a librarian's salary.</p> <p>Yielding suddenly, like a treacherous garter, she murmured, in a voice as soft as stale crackers, while tears rushed to her eyes like shoppers to a bargain counter, "I am yours". And she clung to him like barbed wire.</p> <p>A thrill of joy went through Mortimer like a highwayman. "Ah!" he cried. "Then I am as happy as a coincidence!"</p> <hr class="chap" /> <p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_35" id="Page_35">[Pg 35]</SPAN></span></p> <div style="break-after:column;"></div><br />