<h2>CHAPTER XXIX</h2>
<p>The evening after the funeral, my young lady and I were seated in the library;
now musing mournfully—one of us despairingly—on our loss, now
venturing conjectures as to the gloomy future.</p>
<p>We had just agreed the best destiny which could await Catherine would be a
permission to continue resident at the Grange; at least during Linton’s
life: he being allowed to join her there, and I to remain as housekeeper. That
seemed rather too favourable an arrangement to be hoped for; and yet I did
hope, and began to cheer up under the prospect of retaining my home and my
employment, and, above all, my beloved young mistress; when a servant—one
of the discarded ones, not yet departed—rushed hastily in, and said
“that devil Heathcliff” was coming through the court: should he
fasten the door in his face?</p>
<p>If we had been mad enough to order that proceeding, we had not time. He made no
ceremony of knocking or announcing his name: he was master, and availed himself
of the master’s privilege to walk straight in, without saying a word. The
sound of our informant’s voice directed him to the library; he entered
and motioning him out, shut the door.</p>
<p>It was the same room into which he had been ushered, as a guest, eighteen years
before: the same moon shone through the window; and the same autumn landscape
lay outside. We had not yet lighted a candle, but all the apartment was
visible, even to the portraits on the wall: the splendid head of Mrs. Linton,
and the graceful one of her husband. Heathcliff advanced to the hearth. Time
had little altered his person either. There was the same man: his dark face
rather sallower and more composed, his frame a stone or two heavier, perhaps,
and no other difference. Catherine had risen with an impulse to dash out, when
she saw him.</p>
<p>“Stop!” he said, arresting her by the arm. “No more runnings
away! Where would you go? I’m come to fetch you home; and I hope
you’ll be a dutiful daughter and not encourage my son to further
disobedience. I was embarrassed how to punish him when I discovered his part in
the business: he’s such a cobweb, a pinch would annihilate him; but
you’ll see by his look that he has received his due! I brought him down
one evening, the day before yesterday, and just set him in a chair, and never
touched him afterwards. I sent Hareton out, and we had the room to ourselves.
In two hours, I called Joseph to carry him up again; and since then my presence
is as potent on his nerves as a ghost; and I fancy he sees me often, though I
am not near. Hareton says he wakes and shrieks in the night by the hour
together, and calls you to protect him from me; and, whether you like your
precious mate, or not, you must come: he’s your concern now; I yield all
my interest in him to you.”</p>
<p>“Why not let Catherine continue here,” I pleaded, “and send
Master Linton to her? As you hate them both, you’d not miss them: they
<i>can</i> only be a daily plague to your unnatural heart.”</p>
<p>“I’m seeking a tenant for the Grange,” he answered;
“and I want my children about me, to be sure. Besides, that lass owes me
her services for her bread. I’m not going to nurture her in luxury and
idleness after Linton is gone. Make haste and get ready, now; and don’t
oblige me to compel you.”</p>
<p>“I shall,” said Catherine. “Linton is all I have to love in
the world, and though you have done what you could to make him hateful to me,
and me to him, you <i>cannot</i> make us hate each other. And I defy you to
hurt him when I am by, and I defy you to frighten me!”</p>
<p>“You are a boastful champion,” replied Heathcliff; “but I
don’t like you well enough to hurt him: you shall get the full benefit of
the torment, as long as it lasts. It is not I who will make him hateful to
you—it is his own sweet spirit. He’s as bitter as gall at your
desertion and its consequences: don’t expect thanks for this noble
devotion. I heard him draw a pleasant picture to Zillah of what he would do if
he were as strong as I: the inclination is there, and his very weakness will
sharpen his wits to find a substitute for strength.”</p>
<p>“I know he has a bad nature,” said Catherine: “he’s
your son. But I’m glad I’ve a better, to forgive it; and I know he
loves me, and for that reason I love him. Mr. Heathcliff, <i>you</i> have
<i>nobody</i> to love you; and, however miserable you make us, we shall still
have the revenge of thinking that your cruelty arises from your greater misery.
You <i>are</i> miserable, are you not? Lonely, like the devil, and envious like
him? <i>Nobody</i> loves you—<i>nobody</i> will cry for you when you die!
I wouldn’t be you!”</p>
<p>Catherine spoke with a kind of dreary triumph: she seemed to have made up her
mind to enter into the spirit of her future family, and draw pleasure from the
griefs of her enemies.</p>
<p>“You shall be sorry to be yourself presently,” said her
father-in-law, “if you stand there another minute. Begone, witch, and get
your things!”</p>
<p>She scornfully withdrew. In her absence I began to beg for Zillah’s place
at the Heights, offering to resign mine to her; but he would suffer it on no
account. He bid me be silent; and then, for the first time, allowed himself a
glance round the room and a look at the pictures. Having studied Mrs.
Linton’s, he said—“I shall have that home. Not because I need
it, but—” He turned abruptly to the fire, and continued, with what,
for lack of a better word, I must call a smile—“I’ll tell you
what I did yesterday! I got the sexton, who was digging Linton’s grave,
to remove the earth off her coffin lid, and I opened it. I thought, once, I
would have stayed there: when I saw her face again—it is hers
yet!—he had hard work to stir me; but he said it would change if the air
blew on it, and so I struck one side of the coffin loose, and covered it up:
not Linton’s side, damn him! I wish he’d been soldered in lead. And
I bribed the sexton to pull it away when I’m laid there, and slide mine
out too; I’ll have it made so: and then by the time Linton gets to us
he’ll not know which is which!”</p>
<p>“You were very wicked, Mr. Heathcliff!” I exclaimed; “were
you not ashamed to disturb the dead?”</p>
<p>“I disturbed nobody, Nelly,” he replied; “and I gave some
ease to myself. I shall be a great deal more comfortable now; and you’ll
have a better chance of keeping me underground, when I get there. Disturbed
her? No! she has disturbed me, night and day, through eighteen
years—incessantly—remorselessly—till yesternight; and
yesternight I was tranquil. I dreamt I was sleeping the last sleep by that
sleeper, with my heart stopped and my cheek frozen against hers.”</p>
<p>“And if she had been dissolved into earth, or worse, what would you have
dreamt of then?” I said.</p>
<p>“Of dissolving with her, and being more happy still!” he answered.
“Do you suppose I dread any change of that sort? I expected such a
transformation on raising the lid, but I’m better pleased that it should
not commence till I share it. Besides, unless I had received a distinct
impression of her passionless features, that strange feeling would hardly have
been removed. It began oddly. You know I was wild after she died; and
eternally, from dawn to dawn, praying her to return to me her spirit! I have a
strong faith in ghosts: I have a conviction that they can, and do, exist among
us! The day she was buried, there came a fall of snow. In the evening I went to
the churchyard. It blew bleak as winter—all round was solitary. I
didn’t fear that her fool of a husband would wander up the glen so late;
and no one else had business to bring them there. Being alone, and conscious
two yards of loose earth was the sole barrier between us, I said to
myself—‘I’ll have her in my arms again! If she be cold,
I’ll think it is this north wind that chills <i>me</i>; and if she be
motionless, it is sleep.’ I got a spade from the tool-house, and began to
delve with all my might—it scraped the coffin; I fell to work with my
hands; the wood commenced cracking about the screws; I was on the point of
attaining my object, when it seemed that I heard a sigh from some one above,
close at the edge of the grave, and bending down. ‘If I can only get this
off,’ I muttered, ‘I wish they may shovel in the earth over us
both!’ and I wrenched at it more desperately still. There was another
sigh, close at my ear. I appeared to feel the warm breath of it displacing the
sleet-laden wind. I knew no living thing in flesh and blood was by; but, as
certainly as you perceive the approach to some substantial body in the dark,
though it cannot be discerned, so certainly I felt that Cathy was there: not
under me, but on the earth. A sudden sense of relief flowed from my heart
through every limb. I relinquished my labour of agony, and turned consoled at
once: unspeakably consoled. Her presence was with me: it remained while I
re-filled the grave, and led me home. You may laugh, if you will; but I was
sure I should see her there. I was sure she was with me, and I could not help
talking to her. Having reached the Heights, I rushed eagerly to the door. It
was fastened; and, I remember, that accursed Earnshaw and my wife opposed my
entrance. I remember stopping to kick the breath out of him, and then hurrying
upstairs, to my room and hers. I looked round impatiently—I felt her by
me—I could <i>almost</i> see her, and yet I <i>could not</i>! I ought to
have sweat blood then, from the anguish of my yearning—from the fervour
of my supplications to have but one glimpse! I had not one. She showed herself,
as she often was in life, a devil to me! And, since then, sometimes more and
sometimes less, I’ve been the sport of that intolerable torture!
Infernal! keeping my nerves at such a stretch that, if they had not resembled
catgut, they would long ago have relaxed to the feebleness of Linton’s.
When I sat in the house with Hareton, it seemed that on going out I should meet
her; when I walked on the moors I should meet her coming in. When I went from
home I hastened to return; she <i>must</i> be somewhere at the Heights, I was
certain! And when I slept in her chamber—I was beaten out of that. I
couldn’t lie there; for the moment I closed my eyes, she was either
outside the window, or sliding back the panels, or entering the room, or even
resting her darling head on the same pillow as she did when a child; and I must
open my lids to see. And so I opened and closed them a hundred times a
night—to be always disappointed! It racked me! I’ve often groaned
aloud, till that old rascal Joseph no doubt believed that my conscience was
playing the fiend inside of me. Now, since I’ve seen her, I’m
pacified—a little. It was a strange way of killing: not by inches, but by
fractions of hairbreadths, to beguile me with the spectre of a hope through
eighteen years!”</p>
<p>Mr. Heathcliff paused and wiped his forehead; his hair clung to it, wet with
perspiration; his eyes were fixed on the red embers of the fire, the brows not
contracted, but raised next the temples; diminishing the grim aspect of his
countenance, but imparting a peculiar look of trouble, and a painful appearance
of mental tension towards one absorbing subject. He only half addressed me, and
I maintained silence. I didn’t like to hear him talk! After a short
period he resumed his meditation on the picture, took it down and leant it
against the sofa to contemplate it at better advantage; and while so occupied
Catherine entered, announcing that she was ready, when her pony should be
saddled.</p>
<p>“Send that over to-morrow,” said Heathcliff to me; then turning to
her, he added: “You may do without your pony: it is a fine evening, and
you’ll need no ponies at Wuthering Heights; for what journeys you take,
your own feet will serve you. Come along.”</p>
<p>“Good-bye, Ellen!” whispered my dear little mistress. As she kissed
me, her lips felt like ice. “Come and see me, Ellen; don’t
forget.”</p>
<p>“Take care you do no such thing, Mrs. Dean!” said her new father.
“When I wish to speak to you I’ll come here. I want none of your
prying at my house!”</p>
<p>He signed her to precede him; and casting back a look that cut my heart, she
obeyed. I watched them, from the window, walk down the garden. Heathcliff fixed
Catherine’s arm under his: though she disputed the act at first
evidently; and with rapid strides he hurried her into the alley, whose trees
concealed them.</p>
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