<h3>I - CHAPTER IV.</h3>
<p class="gutsumm">Mildendo, the metropolis of Lilliput,
described, together with the emperor’s palace. A
conversation between the author and a principal secretary,
concerning the affairs of that empire. The author’s
offers to serve the emperor in his wars.</p>
<p>The first request I made, after I had obtained my liberty,
was, that I might have license to see Mildendo, the metropolis;
which the emperor easily granted me, but with a special charge to
do no hurt either to the inhabitants or their houses. The
people had notice, by proclamation, of my design to visit the
town. The wall which encompassed it is two feet and a half
high, and at least eleven inches broad, so that a coach and
horses may be driven very safely round it; and it is flanked with
strong towers at ten feet distance. I stepped over the
great western gate, and passed very gently, and sidling, through
the two principal streets, only in my short waistcoat, for fear
of damaging the roofs and eaves of the houses with the skirts of
my coat. I walked with the utmost circumspection, to avoid
treading on any stragglers who might remain in the streets,
although the orders were very strict, that all people should keep
in their houses, at their own peril. The garret windows and
tops of houses were so crowded with spectators, that I thought in
all my travels I had not seen a more populous place. The
city is an exact square, each side of the wall being five hundred
feet long. The two great streets, which run across and
divide it into four quarters, are five feet wide. The lanes
and alleys, which I could not enter, but only view them as I
passed, are from twelve to eighteen inches. The town is
capable of holding five hundred thousand souls: the houses are
from three to five stories: the shops and markets well
provided.</p>
<p>The emperor’s palace is in the centre of the city where
the two great streets meet. It is enclosed by a wall of two
feet high, and twenty feet distance from the buildings. I
had his majesty’s permission to step over this wall; and,
the space being so wide between that and the palace, I could
easily view it on every side. The outward court is a square
of forty feet, and includes two other courts: in the inmost are
the royal apartments, which I was very desirous to see, but found
it extremely difficult; for the great gates, from one square into
another, were but eighteen inches high, and seven inches
wide. Now the buildings of the outer court were at least
five feet high, and it was impossible for me to stride over them
without infinite damage to the pile, though the walls were
strongly built of hewn stone, and four inches thick. At the
same time the emperor had a great desire that I should see the
magnificence of his palace; but this I was not able to do till
three days after, which I spent in cutting down with my knife
some of the largest trees in the royal park, about a hundred
yards distant from the city. Of these trees I made two
stools, each about three feet high, and strong enough to bear my
weight. The people having received notice a second time, I
went again through the city to the palace with my two stools in
my hands. When I came to the side of the outer court, I
stood upon one stool, and took the other in my hand; this I
lifted over the roof, and gently set it down on the space between
the first and second court, which was eight feet wide. I
then stept over the building very conveniently from one stool to
the other, and drew up the first after me with a hooked
stick. By this contrivance I got into the inmost court;
and, lying down upon my side, I applied my face to the windows of
the middle stories, which were left open on purpose, and
discovered the most splendid apartments that can be
imagined. There I saw the empress and the young princes, in
their several lodgings, with their chief attendants about
them. Her imperial majesty was pleased to smile very
graciously upon me, and gave me out of the window her hand to
kiss.</p>
<p>But I shall not anticipate the reader with further
descriptions of this kind, because I reserve them for a greater
work, which is now almost ready for the press; containing a
general description of this empire, from its first erection,
through along series of princes; with a particular account of
their wars and politics, laws, learning, and religion; their
plants and animals; their peculiar manners and customs, with
other matters very curious and useful; my chief design at present
being only to relate such events and transactions as happened to
the public or to myself during a residence of about nine months
in that empire.</p>
<p>One morning, about a fortnight after I had obtained my
liberty, Reldresal, principal secretary (as they style him) for
private affairs, came to my house attended only by one
servant. He ordered his coach to wait at a distance, and
desired I would give him an hours audience; which I readily
consented to, on account of his quality and personal merits, as
well as of the many good offices he had done me during my
solicitations at court. I offered to lie down that he might
the more conveniently reach my ear, but he chose rather to let me
hold him in my hand during our conversation. He began with
compliments on my liberty; said “he might pretend to some
merit in it;” but, however, added, “that if it had
not been for the present situation of things at court, perhaps I
might not have obtained it so soon. For,” said he,
“as flourishing a condition as we may appear to be in to
foreigners, we labour under two mighty evils: a violent faction
at home, and the danger of an invasion, by a most potent enemy,
from abroad. As to the first, you are to understand, that
for about seventy moons past there have been two struggling
parties in this empire, under the names of <i>Tramecksan</i> and
<i>Slamecksan</i>, from the high and low heels of their shoes, by
which they distinguish themselves. It is alleged, indeed,
that the high heels are most agreeable to our ancient
constitution; but, however this be, his majesty has determined to
make use only of low heels in the administration of the
government, and all offices in the gift of the crown, as you
cannot but observe; and particularly that his majesty’s
imperial heels are lower at least by a <i>drurr</i> than any of
his court (<i>drurr</i> is a measure about the fourteenth part of
an inch). The animosities between these two parties run so
high, that they will neither eat, nor drink, nor talk with each
other. We compute the <i>Tramecksan</i>, or high heels, to
exceed us in number; but the power is wholly on our side.
We apprehend his imperial highness, the heir to the crown, to
have some tendency towards the high heels; at least we can
plainly discover that one of his heels is higher than the other,
which gives him a hobble in his gait. Now, in the midst of
these intestine disquiets, we are threatened with an invasion
from the island of Blefuscu, which is the other great empire of
the universe, almost as large and powerful as this of his
majesty. For as to what we have heard you affirm, that
there are other kingdoms and states in the world inhabited by
human creatures as large as yourself, our philosophers are in
much doubt, and would rather conjecture that you dropped from the
moon, or one of the stars; because it is certain, that a hundred
mortals of your bulk would in a short time destroy all the fruits
and cattle of his majesty’s dominions: besides, our
histories of six thousand moons make no mention of any other
regions than the two great empires of Lilliput and
Blefuscu. Which two mighty powers have, as I was going to
tell you, been engaged in a most obstinate war for six-and-thirty
moons past. It began upon the following occasion. It
is allowed on all hands, that the primitive way of breaking eggs,
before we eat them, was upon the larger end; but his present
majesty’s grandfather, while he was a boy, going to eat an
egg, and breaking it according to the ancient practice, happened
to cut one of his fingers. Whereupon the emperor his father
published an edict, commanding all his subjects, upon great
penalties, to break the smaller end of their eggs. The
people so highly resented this law, that our histories tell us,
there have been six rebellions raised on that account; wherein
one emperor lost his life, and another his crown. These
civil commotions were constantly fomented by the monarchs of
Blefuscu; and when they were quelled, the exiles always fled for
refuge to that empire. It is computed that eleven thousand
persons have at several times suffered death, rather than submit
to break their eggs at the smaller end. Many hundred large
volumes have been published upon this controversy: but the books
of the Big-endians have been long forbidden, and the whole party
rendered incapable by law of holding employments. During
the course of these troubles, the emperors of Blefusca did
frequently expostulate by their ambassadors, accusing us of
making a schism in religion, by offending against a fundamental
doctrine of our great prophet Lustrog, in the fifty-fourth
chapter of the Blundecral (which is their Alcoran). This,
however, is thought to be a mere strain upon the text; for the
words are these: ‘that all true believers break their eggs
at the convenient end.’ And which is the convenient
end, seems, in my humble opinion to be left to every man’s
conscience, or at least in the power of the chief magistrate to
determine. Now, the Big-endian exiles have found so much
credit in the emperor of Blefuscu’s court, and so much
private assistance and encouragement from their party here at
home, that a bloody war has been carried on between the two
empires for six-and-thirty moons, with various success; during
which time we have lost forty capital ships, and a much a greater
number of smaller vessels, together with thirty thousand of our
best seamen and soldiers; and the damage received by the enemy is
reckoned to be somewhat greater than ours. However, they
have now equipped a numerous fleet, and are just preparing to
make a descent upon us; and his imperial majesty, placing great
confidence in your valour and strength, has commanded me to lay
this account of his affairs before you.”</p>
<p>I desired the secretary to present my humble duty to the
emperor; and to let him know, “that I thought it would not
become me, who was a foreigner, to interfere with parties; but I
was ready, with the hazard of my life, to defend his person and
state against all invaders.”</p>
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