<h2><SPAN name="chap42"></SPAN>XLII</h2>
<p>It was now broad day, and she started again, emerging cautiously upon the
highway. But there was no need for caution; not a soul was at hand, and Tess
went onward with fortitude, her recollection of the birds’ silent
endurance of their night of agony impressing upon her the relativity of sorrows
and the tolerable nature of her own, if she could once rise high enough to
despise opinion. But that she could not do so long as it was held by Clare.</p>
<p>She reached Chalk-Newton, and breakfasted at an inn, where several young men
were troublesomely complimentary to her good looks. Somehow she felt hopeful,
for was it not possible that her husband also might say these same things to
her even yet? She was bound to take care of herself on the chance of it, and
keep off these casual lovers. To this end Tess resolved to run no further risks
from her appearance. As soon as she got out of the village she entered a
thicket and took from her basket one of the oldest field-gowns, which she had
never put on even at the dairy—never since she had worked among the
stubble at Marlott. She also, by a felicitous thought, took a handkerchief from
her bundle and tied it round her face under her bonnet, covering her chin and
half her cheeks and temples, as if she were suffering from toothache. Then with
her little scissors, by the aid of a pocket looking-glass, she mercilessly
nipped her eyebrows off, and thus insured against aggressive admiration, she
went on her uneven way.</p>
<p>“What a mommet of a maid!” said the next man who met her to a
companion.</p>
<p>Tears came into her eyes for very pity of herself as she heard him.</p>
<p>“But I don’t care!” she said. “O no—I don’t
care! I’ll always be ugly now, because Angel is not here, and I have
nobody to take care of me. My husband that was is gone away, and never will
love me any more; but I love him just the same, and hate all other men, and
like to make ’em think scornfully of me!”</p>
<p>Thus Tess walks on; a figure which is part of the landscape; a fieldwoman pure
and simple, in winter guise; a gray serge cape, a red woollen cravat, a stuff
skirt covered by a whitey-brown rough wrapper, and buff-leather gloves. Every
thread of that old attire has become faded and thin under the stroke of
raindrops, the burn of sunbeams, and the stress of winds. There is no sign of
young passion in her now—</p>
<p class="poem">
The maiden’s mouth is cold<br/>
. . . . .<br/>
Fold over simple fold<br/>
Binding her head.</p>
<p>Inside this exterior, over which the eye might have roved as over a thing
scarcely percipient, almost inorganic, there was the record of a pulsing life
which had learnt too well, for its years, of the dust and ashes of things, of
the cruelty of lust and the fragility of love.</p>
<p>Next day the weather was bad, but she trudged on, the honesty, directness, and
impartiality of elemental enmity disconcerting her but little. Her object being
a winter’s occupation and a winter’s home, there was no time to
lose. Her experience of short hirings had been such that she was determined to
accept no more.</p>
<p>Thus she went forward from farm to farm in the direction of the place whence
Marian had written to her, which she determined to make use of as a last shift
only, its rumoured stringencies being the reverse of tempting. First she
inquired for the lighter kinds of employment, and, as acceptance in any variety
of these grew hopeless, applied next for the less light, till, beginning with
the dairy and poultry tendance that she liked best, she ended with the heavy
and course pursuits which she liked least—work on arable land: work of
such roughness, indeed, as she would never have deliberately voluteered for.</p>
<p>Towards the second evening she reached the irregular chalk table-land or
plateau, bosomed with semi-globular tumuli—as if Cybele the Many-breasted
were supinely extended there—which stretched between the valley of her
birth and the valley of her love.</p>
<p>Here the air was dry and cold, and the long cart-roads were blown white and
dusty within a few hours after rain. There were few trees, or none, those that
would have grown in the hedges being mercilessly plashed down with the quickset
by the tenant-farmers, the natural enemies of tree, bush, and brake. In the
middle distance ahead of her she could see the summits of Bulbarrow and of
Nettlecombe Tout, and they seemed friendly. They had a low and unassuming
aspect from this upland, though as approached on the other side from Blackmoor
in her childhood they were as lofty bastions against the sky. Southerly, at
many miles’ distance, and over the hills and ridges coastward, she could
discern a surface like polished steel: it was the English Channel at a point
far out towards France.</p>
<p>Before her, in a slight depression, were the remains of a village. She had, in
fact, reached Flintcomb-Ash, the place of Marian’s sojourn. There seemed
to be no help for it; hither she was doomed to come. The stubborn soil around
her showed plainly enough that the kind of labour in demand here was of the
roughest kind; but it was time to rest from searching, and she resolved to
stay, particularly as it began to rain. At the entrance to the village was a
cottage whose gable jutted into the road, and before applying for a lodging she
stood under its shelter, and watched the evening close in.</p>
<p>“Who would think I was Mrs Angel Clare!” she said.</p>
<p>The wall felt warm to her back and shoulders, and she found that immediately
within the gable was the cottage fireplace, the heat of which came through the
bricks. She warmed her hands upon them, and also put her cheek—red and
moist with the drizzle—against their comforting surface. The wall seemed
to be the only friend she had. She had so little wish to leave it that she
could have stayed there all night.</p>
<p>Tess could hear the occupants of the cottage—gathered together after
their day’s labour—talking to each other within, and the rattle of
their supper-plates was also audible. But in the village-street she had seen no
soul as yet. The solitude was at last broken by the approach of one feminine
figure, who, though the evening was cold, wore the print gown and the
tilt-bonnet of summer time. Tess instinctively thought it might be Marian, and
when she came near enough to be distinguishable in the gloom, surely enough it
was she. Marian was even stouter and redder in the face than formerly, and
decidedly shabbier in attire. At any previous period of her existence Tess
would hardly have cared to renew the acquaintance in such conditions; but her
loneliness was excessive, and she responded readily to Marian’s greeting.</p>
<p>Marian was quite respectful in her inquiries, but seemed much moved by the fact
that Tess should still continue in no better condition than at first; though
she had dimly heard of the separation.</p>
<p>“Tess—Mrs Clare—the dear wife of dear he! And is it really so
bad as this, my child? Why is your cwomely face tied up in such a way? Anybody
been beating ’ee? Not <i>he</i>?”</p>
<p>“No, no, no! I merely did it not to be clipsed or colled, Marian.”</p>
<p>She pulled off in disgust a bandage which could suggest such wild thoughts.</p>
<p>“And you’ve got no collar on” (Tess had been accustomed to
wear a little white collar at the dairy).</p>
<p>“I know it, Marian.”</p>
<p>“You’ve lost it travelling.”</p>
<p>“I’ve not lost it. The truth is, I don’t care anything about
my looks; and so I didn’t put it on.”</p>
<p>“And you don’t wear your wedding-ring?”</p>
<p>“Yes, I do; but not in public. I wear it round my neck on a ribbon. I
don’t wish people to think who I am by marriage, or that I am married at
all; it would be so awkward while I lead my present life.”</p>
<p>Marian paused.</p>
<p>“But you <i>be</i> a gentleman’s wife; and it seems hardly fair
that you should live like this!”</p>
<p>“O yes it is, quite fair; though I am very unhappy.”</p>
<p>“Well, well. <i>He</i> married you—and you can be unhappy!”</p>
<p>“Wives are unhappy sometimes; from no fault of their husbands—from
their own.”</p>
<p>“You’ve no faults, deary; that I’m sure of. And he’s
none. So it must be something outside ye both.”</p>
<p>“Marian, dear Marian, will you do me a good turn without asking
questions? My husband has gone abroad, and somehow I have overrun my allowance,
so that I have to fall back upon my old work for a time. Do not call me Mrs
Clare, but Tess, as before. Do they want a hand here?”</p>
<p>“O yes; they’ll take one always, because few care to come.
’Tis a starve-acre place. Corn and swedes are all they grow. Though I be
here myself, I feel ’tis a pity for such as you to come.”</p>
<p>“But you used to be as good a dairywoman as I.”</p>
<p>“Yes; but I’ve got out o’ that since I took to drink. Lord,
that’s the only comfort I’ve got now! If you engage, you’ll
be set swede-hacking. That’s what I be doing; but you won’t like
it.”</p>
<p>“O—anything! Will you speak for me?”</p>
<p>“You will do better by speaking for yourself.”</p>
<p>“Very well. Now, Marian, remember—nothing about <i>him</i> if I get
the place. I don’t wish to bring his name down to the dirt.”</p>
<p>Marian, who was really a trustworthy girl though of coarser grain than Tess,
promised anything she asked.</p>
<p>“This is pay-night,” she said, “and if you were to come with
me you would know at once. I be real sorry that you are not happy; but
’tis because he’s away, I know. You couldn’t be unhappy if he
were here, even if he gie’d ye no money—even if he used you like a
drudge.”</p>
<p>“That’s true; I could not!”</p>
<p>They walked on together and soon reached the farmhouse, which was almost
sublime in its dreariness. There was not a tree within sight; there was not, at
this season, a green pasture—nothing but fallow and turnips everywhere,
in large fields divided by hedges plashed to unrelieved levels.</p>
<p>Tess waited outside the door of the farmhouse till the group of workfolk had
received their wages, and then Marian introduced her. The farmer himself, it
appeared, was not at home, but his wife, who represented him this evening, made
no objection to hiring Tess, on her agreeing to remain till Old Lady-Day.
Female field-labour was seldom offered now, and its cheapness made it
profitable for tasks which women could perform as readily as men.</p>
<p>Having signed the agreement, there was nothing more for Tess to do at present
than to get a lodging, and she found one in the house at whose gable-wall she
had warmed herself. It was a poor subsistence that she had ensured, but it
would afford a shelter for the winter at any rate.</p>
<p>That night she wrote to inform her parents of her new address, in case a letter
should arrive at Marlott from her husband. But she did not tell them of the
sorriness of her situation: it might have brought reproach upon him.</p>
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