<h2>CHAPTER XXXIII</h2>
<p>We waited all day for Wolf Larsen to come ashore. It was
an intolerable period of anxiety. Each moment one or the
other of us cast expectant glances toward the <i>Ghost</i>.
But he did not come. He did not even appear on deck.</p>
<p>“Perhaps it is his headache,” I said.
“I left him lying on the poop. He may lie there all
night. I think I’ll go and see.”</p>
<p>Maud looked entreaty at me.</p>
<p>“It is all right,” I assured her. “I
shall take the revolvers. You know I collected every weapon
on board.”</p>
<p>“But there are his arms, his hands, his terrible,
terrible hands!” she objected. And then she cried,
“Oh, Humphrey, I am afraid of him! Don’t
go—please don’t go!”</p>
<p>She rested her hand appealingly on mine, and sent my pulse
fluttering. My heart was surely in my eyes for a
moment. The dear and lovely woman! And she was so
much the woman, clinging and appealing, sunshine and dew to my
manhood, rooting it deeper and sending through it the sap of a
new strength. I was for putting my arm around her, as when
in the midst of the seal herd; but I considered, and
refrained.</p>
<p>“I shall not take any risks,” I said.
“I’ll merely peep over the bow and see.”</p>
<p>She pressed my hand earnestly and let me go. But the
space on deck where I had left him lying was vacant. He had
evidently gone below. That night we stood alternate
watches, one of us sleeping at a time; for there was no telling
what Wolf Larsen might do. He was certainly capable of
anything.</p>
<p>The next day we waited, and the next, and still he made no
sign.</p>
<p>“These headaches of his, these attacks,” Maud
said, on the afternoon of the fourth day; “Perhaps he is
ill, very ill. He may be dead.”</p>
<p>“Or dying,” was her afterthought when she had
waited some time for me to speak.</p>
<p>“Better so,” I answered.</p>
<p>“But think, Humphrey, a fellow-creature in his last
lonely hour.”</p>
<p>“Perhaps,” I suggested.</p>
<p>“Yes, even perhaps,” she acknowledged.
“But we do not know. It would be terrible if he
were. I could never forgive myself. We must do
something.”</p>
<p>“Perhaps,” I suggested again.</p>
<p>I waited, smiling inwardly at the woman of her which compelled
a solicitude for Wolf Larsen, of all creatures. Where was
her solicitude for me, I thought,—for me whom she had been
afraid to have merely peep aboard?</p>
<p>She was too subtle not to follow the trend of my
silence. And she was as direct as she was subtle.</p>
<p>“You must go aboard, Humphrey, and find out,” she
said. “And if you want to laugh at me, you have my
consent and forgiveness.”</p>
<p>I arose obediently and went down the beach.</p>
<p>“Do be careful,” she called after me.</p>
<p>I waved my arm from the forecastle head and dropped down to
the deck. Aft I walked to the cabin companion, where I
contented myself with hailing below. Wolf Larsen answered,
and as he started to ascend the stairs I cocked my
revolver. I displayed it openly during our conversation,
but he took no notice of it. He appeared the same,
physically, as when last I saw him, but he was gloomy and
silent. In fact, the few words we spoke could hardly be
called a conversation. I did not inquire why he had not
been ashore, nor did he ask why I had not come aboard. His
head was all right again, he said, and so, without further
parley, I left him.</p>
<p>Maud received my report with obvious relief, and the sight of
smoke which later rose in the galley put her in a more cheerful
mood. The next day, and the next, we saw the galley smoke
rising, and sometimes we caught glimpses of him on the
poop. But that was all. He made no attempt to come
ashore. This we knew, for we still maintained our
night-watches. We were waiting for him to do something, to
show his hand, so to say, and his inaction puzzled and worried
us.</p>
<p>A week of this passed by. We had no other interest than
Wolf Larsen, and his presence weighed us down with an
apprehension which prevented us from doing any of the little
things we had planned.</p>
<p>But at the end of the week the smoke ceased rising from the
galley, and he no longer showed himself on the poop. I
could see Maud’s solicitude again growing, though she
timidly—and even proudly, I think—forbore a
repetition of her request. After all, what censure could be
put upon her? She was divinely altruistic, and she was a
woman. Besides, I was myself aware of hurt at thought of
this man whom I had tried to kill, dying alone with his
fellow-creatures so near. He was right. The code of
my group was stronger than I. The fact that he had hands,
feet, and a body shaped somewhat like mine, constituted a claim
which I could not ignore.</p>
<p>So I did not wait a second time for Maud to send me. I
discovered that we stood in need of condensed milk and marmalade,
and announced that I was going aboard. I could see that she
wavered. She even went so far as to murmur that they were
non-essentials and that my trip after them might be
inexpedient. And as she had followed the trend of my
silence, she now followed the trend of my speech, and she knew
that I was going aboard, not because of condensed milk and
marmalade, but because of her and of her anxiety, which she knew
she had failed to hide.</p>
<p>I took off my shoes when I gained the forecastle head, and
went noiselessly aft in my stocking feet. Nor did I call
this time from the top of the companion-way. Cautiously
descending, I found the cabin deserted. The door to his
state-room was closed. At first I thought of knocking, then
I remembered my ostensible errand and resolved to carry it
out. Carefully avoiding noise, I lifted the trap-door in
the floor and set it to one side. The slop-chest, as well
as the provisions, was stored in the lazarette, and I took
advantage of the opportunity to lay in a stock of
underclothing.</p>
<p>As I emerged from the lazarette I heard sounds in Wolf
Larsen’s state-room. I crouched and listened.
The door-knob rattled. Furtively, instinctively, I slunk
back behind the table and drew and cocked my revolver. The
door swung open and he came forth. Never had I seen so
profound a despair as that which I saw on his face,—the
face of Wolf Larsen the fighter, the strong man, the indomitable
one. For all the world like a woman wringing her hands, he
raised his clenched fists and groaned. One fist unclosed,
and the open palm swept across his eyes as though brushing away
cobwebs.</p>
<p>“God! God!” he groaned, and the clenched
fists were raised again to the infinite despair with which his
throat vibrated.</p>
<p>It was horrible. I was trembling all over, and I could
feel the shivers running up and down my spine and the sweat
standing out on my forehead. Surely there can be little in
this world more awful than the spectacle of a strong man in the
moment when he is utterly weak and broken.</p>
<p>But Wolf Larsen regained control of himself by an exertion of
his remarkable will. And it was exertion. His whole
frame shook with the struggle. He resembled a man on the
verge of a fit. His face strove to compose itself, writhing
and twisting in the effort till he broke down again. Once
more the clenched fists went upward and he groaned. He
caught his breath once or twice and sobbed. Then he was
successful. I could have thought him the old Wolf Larsen,
and yet there was in his movements a vague suggestion of weakness
and indecision. He started for the companion-way, and
stepped forward quite as I had been accustomed to see him do; and
yet again, in his very walk, there seemed that suggestion of
weakness and indecision.</p>
<p>I was now concerned with fear for myself. The open trap
lay directly in his path, and his discovery of it would lead
instantly to his discovery of me. I was angry with myself
for being caught in so cowardly a position, crouching on the
floor. There was yet time. I rose swiftly to my feet,
and, I know, quite unconsciously assumed a defiant
attitude. He took no notice of me. Nor did he notice
the open trap. Before I could grasp the situation, or act,
he had walked right into the trap. One foot was descending
into the opening, while the other foot was just on the verge of
beginning the uplift. But when the descending foot missed
the solid flooring and felt vacancy beneath, it was the old Wolf
Larsen and the tiger muscles that made the falling body spring
across the opening, even as it fell, so that he struck on his
chest and stomach, with arms outstretched, on the floor of the
opposite side. The next instant he had drawn up his legs
and rolled clear. But he rolled into my marmalade and
underclothes and against the trap-door.</p>
<p>The expression on his face was one of complete
comprehension. But before I could guess what he had
comprehended, he had dropped the trap-door into place, closing
the lazarette. Then I understood. He thought he had
me inside. Also, he was blind, blind as a bat. I
watched him, breathing carefully so that he should not hear
me. He stepped quickly to his state-room. I saw his
hand miss the door-knob by an inch, quickly fumble for it, and
find it. This was my chance. I tiptoed across the
cabin and to the top of the stairs. He came back, dragging
a heavy sea-chest, which he deposited on top of the trap.
Not content with this he fetched a second chest and placed it on
top of the first. Then he gathered up the marmalade and
underclothes and put them on the table. When he started up
the companion-way, I retreated, silently rolling over on top of
the cabin.</p>
<p>He shoved the slide part way back and rested his arms on it,
his body still in the companion-way. His attitude was of
one looking forward the length of the schooner, or staring,
rather, for his eyes were fixed and unblinking. I was only
five feet away and directly in what should have been his line of
vision. It was uncanny. I felt myself a ghost, what
of my invisibility. I waved my hand back and forth, of
course without effect; but when the moving shadow fell across his
face I saw at once that he was susceptible to the
impression. His face became more expectant and tense as he
tried to analyze and identify the impression. He knew that
he had responded to something from without, that his sensibility
had been touched by a changing something in his environment; but
what it was he could not discover. I ceased waving my hand,
so that the shadow remained stationary. He slowly moved his
head back and forth under it and turned from side to side, now in
the sunshine, now in the shade, feeling the shadow, as it were,
testing it by sensation.</p>
<p>I, too, was busy, trying to reason out how he was aware of the
existence of so intangible a thing as a shadow. If it were
his eyeballs only that were affected, or if his optic nerve were
not wholly destroyed, the explanation was simple. If
otherwise, then the only conclusion I could reach was that the
sensitive skin recognized the difference of temperature between
shade and sunshine. Or, perhaps,—who can
tell?—it was that fabled sixth sense which conveyed to him
the loom and feel of an object close at hand.</p>
<p>Giving over his attempt to determine the shadow, he stepped on
deck and started forward, walking with a swiftness and confidence
which surprised me. And still there was that hint of the
feebleness of the blind in his walk. I knew it now for what
it was.</p>
<p>To my amused chagrin, he discovered my shoes on the forecastle
head and brought them back with him into the galley. I
watched him build the fire and set about cooking food for
himself; then I stole into the cabin for my marmalade and
underclothes, slipped back past the galley, and climbed down to
the beach to deliver my barefoot report.</p>
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