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<h2> CHAPTER XIII THE SMALLPOX MEDICINE </h2>
<p>Next morning Penrod woke in profound depression of spirit, the cotillon
ominous before him. He pictured Marjorie Jones and Maurice, graceful and
light-hearted, flitting by him fairylike, loosing silvery laughter upon
him as he engaged in the struggle to keep step with a partner about four
years and two feet his junior. It was hard enough for Penrod to keep step
with a girl of his size.</p>
<p>The foreboding vision remained with him, increasing in vividness,
throughout the forenoon. He found himself unable to fix his mind upon
anything else, and, having bent his gloomy footsteps toward the
sawdust-box, after breakfast, presently descended therefrom, abandoning
Harold Ramorez where he had left him the preceding Saturday. Then, as he
sat communing silently with wistful Duke, in the storeroom, coquettish
fortune looked his way.</p>
<p>It was the habit of Penrod's mother not to throw away anything whatsoever
until years of storage conclusively proved there would never be a use for
it; but a recent house-cleaning had ejected upon the back porch a great
quantity of bottles and other paraphernalia of medicine, left over from
illnesses in the family during a period of several years. This debris
Della, the cook, had collected in a large market basket, adding to it some
bottles of flavouring extracts that had proved unpopular in the household;
also, old catsup bottles; a jar or two of preserves gone bad; various
rejected dental liquids—and other things. And she carried the basket
out to the storeroom in the stable.</p>
<p>Penrod was at first unaware of what lay before him. Chin on palms, he sat
upon the iron rim of a former aquarium and stared morbidly through the
open door at the checkered departing back of Della. It was another who saw
treasure in the basket she had left.</p>
<p>Mr. Samuel Williams, aged eleven, and congenial to Penrod in years, sex,
and disposition, appeared in the doorway, shaking into foam a black liquid
within a pint bottle, stoppered by a thumb.</p>
<p>"Yay, Penrod!" the visitor gave greeting.</p>
<p>"Yay," said Penrod with slight enthusiasm. "What you got?"</p>
<p>"Lickrish water."</p>
<p>"Drinkin's!" demanded Penrod promptly. This is equivalent to the cry of
"Biters" when an apple is shown, and establishes unquestionable title.</p>
<p>"Down to there!" stipulated Sam, removing his thumb to affix it firmly as
a mark upon the side of the bottle a check upon gormandizing that remained
carefully in place while Penrod drank.</p>
<p>This rite concluded, the visitor's eye fell upon the basket deposited by
Della. He emitted tokens of pleasure.</p>
<p>"Looky! Looky! Looky there! That ain't any good pile o' stuff—oh,
no!"</p>
<p>"What for?"</p>
<p>"Drug store!" shouted Sam. "We'll be partners——"</p>
<p>"Or else," Penrod suggested, "I'll run the drug store and you be a
customer——"</p>
<p>"No! Partners!" insisted Sam with such conviction that his host yielded;
and within ten minutes the drug store was doing a heavy business with
imaginary patrons. Improvising counters with boards and boxes, and setting
forth a very druggish-looking stock from the basket, each of the partners
found occupation to his taste—Penrod as salesman and Sam as
prescription clerk.</p>
<p>"Here you are, madam!" said Penrod briskly, offering a vial of Sam's
mixing to an invisible matron. "This will cure your husband in a few
minutes. Here's the camphor, mister. Call again! Fifty cents' worth of
pills? Yes, madam. There you are! Hurry up with that dose for the nigger
lady, Bill!"</p>
<p>"I'll 'tend to it soon's I get time, Jim," replied the prescription clerk.
"I'm busy fixin' the smallpox medicine for the sick policeman downtown."</p>
<p>Penrod stopped sales to watch this operation. Sam had found an empty pint
bottle and, with the pursed lips and measuring eye of a great chemist, was
engaged in filling it from other bottles.</p>
<p>First, he poured into it some of the syrup from the condemned preserves;
and a quantity of extinct hair oil; next the remaining contents of a dozen
small vials cryptically labelled with physicians' prescriptions; then some
remnants of catsup and essence of beef and what was left in several
bottles of mouthwash; after that a quantity of rejected flavouring extract—topping
off by shaking into the mouth of the bottle various powders from small
pink papers, relics of Mr. Schofield's influenza of the preceding winter.</p>
<p>Sam examined the combination with concern, appearing unsatisfied. "We got
to make that smallpox medicine good and strong!" he remarked; and, his
artistic sense growing more powerful than his appetite, he poured about a
quarter of the licorice water into the smallpox medicine.</p>
<p>"What you doin'?" protested Penrod. "What you want to waste that lickrish
water for? We ought to keep it to drink when we're tired."</p>
<p>"I guess I got a right to use my own lickrish water any way I want to,"
replied the prescription clerk. "I tell you, you can't get smallpox
medicine too strong. Look at her now!" He held the bottle up admiringly.
"She's as black as lickrish. I bet you she's strong all right!"</p>
<p>"I wonder how she tastes?" said Penrod thoughtfully.</p>
<p>"Don't smell so awful much," observed Sam, sniffing the bottle—"a
good deal, though!"</p>
<p>"I wonder if it'd make us sick to drink it?" said Penrod.</p>
<p>Sam looked at the bottle thoughtfully; then his eye, wandering, fell upon
Duke, placidly curled up near the door, and lighted with the advent of an
idea new to him, but old, old in the world—older than Egypt!</p>
<p>"Let's give Duke some!" he cried.</p>
<p>That was the spark. They acted immediately; and a minute later Duke,
released from custody with a competent potion of the smallpox medicine
inside him, settled conclusively their doubts concerning its effect. The
patient animal, accustomed to expect the worst at all times, walked out of
the door, shaking his head with an air of considerable annoyance, opening
and closing his mouth with singular energy—and so repeatedly that
they began to count the number of times he did it. Sam thought it was
thirty-nine times, but Penrod had counted forty-one before other and more
striking symptoms appeared.</p>
<p>All things come from Mother Earth and must return—Duke restored much
at this time. Afterward, he ate heartily of grass; and then, over his
shoulder, he bent upon his master one inscrutable look and departed feebly
to the front yard.</p>
<p>The two boys had watched the process with warm interest. "I told you she
was strong!" said Mr. Williams proudly.</p>
<p>"Yes, sir—she is!" Penrod was generous enough to admit. "I expect
she's strong enough——" He paused in thought, and added:</p>
<p>"We haven't got a horse any more."</p>
<p>"I bet you she'd fix him if you had!" said Sam. And it may be that this
was no idle boast.</p>
<p>The pharmaceutical game was not resumed; the experiment upon Duke had made
the drug store commonplace and stimulated the appetite for stronger meat.
Lounging in the doorway, the near-vivisectionists sipped licorice water
alternately and conversed.</p>
<p>"I bet some of our smallpox medicine would fix ole P'fessor Bartet all
right!" quoth Penrod. "I wish he'd come along and ask us for some."</p>
<p>"We could tell him it was lickrish water," added Sam, liking the idea.
"The two bottles look almost the same."</p>
<p>"Then we wouldn't have to go to his ole cotillon this afternoon," Penrod
sighed. "There wouldn't be any!"</p>
<p>"Who's your partner, Pen?"</p>
<p>"Who's yours?"</p>
<p>"Who's yours? I just ast you."</p>
<p>"Oh, she's all right!" And Penrod smiled boastfully.</p>
<p>"I bet you wanted to dance with Marjorie!" said his friend.</p>
<p>"Me? I wouldn't dance with that girl if she begged me to! I wouldn't dance
with her to save her from drowning! I wouldn't da——"</p>
<p>"Oh, no—you wouldn't!" interrupted Mr. Williams skeptically.</p>
<p>Penrod changed his tone and became persuasive.</p>
<p>"Looky here, Sam," he said confidentially. "I've got 'a mighty nice
partner, but my mother don't like her mother; and so I've been thinking I
better not dance with her. I'll tell you what I'll do; I've got a mighty
good sling in the house, and I'll give it to you if you'll change
partners."</p>
<p>"You want to change and you don't even know who mine is!" said Sam, and he
made the simple though precocious deduction: "Yours must be a lala! Well,
I invited Mabel Rorebeck, and she wouldn't let me change if I wanted to.
Mabel Rorebeck'd rather dance with me," he continued serenely, "than
anybody; and she said she was awful afraid you'd ast her. But I ain't
goin' to dance with Mabel after all, because this morning she sent me a
note about her uncle died last night—and P'fessor Bartet'll have to
find me a partner after I get there. Anyway I bet you haven't got any
sling—and I bet your partner's Baby Rennsdale!"</p>
<p>"What if she is?" said Penrod. "She's good enough for ME!" This speech
held not so much modesty in solution as intended praise of the lady. Taken
literally, however, it was an understatement of the facts and wholly
insincere.</p>
<p>"Yay!" jeered Mr. Williams, upon whom his friend's hypocrisy was quite
wasted. "How can your mother not like her mother? Baby Rennsdale hasn't
got any mother! You and her'll be a sight!"</p>
<p>That was Penrod's own conviction; and with this corroboration of it he
grew so spiritless that he could offer no retort. He slid to a despondent
sitting posture upon the door sill and gazed wretchedly upon the ground,
while his companion went to replenish the licorice water at the hydrant—enfeebling
the potency of the liquor no doubt, but making up for that in quantity.</p>
<p>"Your mother goin' with you to the cotillon?" asked Sam when he returned.</p>
<p>"No. She's goin' to meet me there. She's goin' somewhere first."</p>
<p>"So's mine," said Sam. "I'll come by for you."</p>
<p>"All right."</p>
<p>"I better go before long. Noon whistles been blowin'."</p>
<p>"All right," Penrod repeated dully.</p>
<p>Sam turned to go, but paused. A new straw hat was peregrinating along the
fence near the two boys. This hat belonged to someone passing upon the
sidewalk of the cross-street; and the someone was Maurice Levy. Even as
they stared, he halted and regarded them over the fence with two small,
dark eyes.</p>
<p>Fate had brought about this moment and this confrontation.</p>
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