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<h3>Phase the Seventh: Fulfilment, LIII-LIX</h3>
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LIII
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<br/>It was evening at Emminster Vicarage. The two
customary candles were burning under their green shades
in the Vicar's study, but he had not been sitting
there. Occasionally he came in, stirred the small fire
which sufficed for the increasing mildness of the
spring, and went out again; sometimes pausing at the
front door, going on to the drawing-room, then
returning again to the front door.
<br/>It faced westward, and though gloom prevailed inside,
there was still light enough without to see with
distinctness. Mrs Clare, who had been sitting in the
drawing-room, followed him hither.
<br/>"Plenty of time yet," said the Vicar. "He doesn't
reach Chalk-Newton till six, even if the train should
be punctual, and ten miles of country-road, five of
them in Crimmercrock Lane, are not jogged over in a
hurry by our old horse."
<br/>"But he has done it in an hour with us, my dear."
<br/>"Years ago."
<br/>Thus they passed the minutes, each well knowing that
this was only waste of breath, the one essential being
simply to wait.
<br/>At length there was a slight noise in the lane, and the
old pony-chaise appeared indeed outside the railings.
They saw alight therefrom a form which they affected to
recognize, but would actually have passed by in the
street without identifying had he not got out of their
carriage at the particular moment when a particular
person was due.
<br/>Mrs Clare rushed through the dark passage to the door,
and her husband came more slowly after her.
<br/>The new arrival, who was just about to enter, saw their
anxious faces in the doorway and the gleam of the west
in their spectacles because they confronted the last
rays of day; but they could only see his shape against
the light.
<br/>"O, my boy, my boy—home again at last!" cried Mrs
Clare, who cared no more at that moment for the stains
of heterodoxy which had caused all this separation than
for the dust upon his clothes. What woman, indeed,
among the most faithful adherents of the truth,
believes the promises and threats of the Word in the
sense in which she believes in her own children, or
would not throw her theology to the wind if weighed
against their happiness? As soon as they reached the
room where the candles were lighted she looked at his
face.
<br/>"O, it is not Angel—not my son—the Angel who went
away!" she cried in all the irony of sorrow, as she
turned herself aside.
<br/>His father, too, was shocked to see him, so reduced was
that figure from its former contours by worry and the
bad season that Clare had experienced, in the climate
to which he had so rashly hurried in his first aversion
to the mockery of events at home. You could see the
skeleton behind the man, and almost the ghost behind
the skeleton. He matched Crivelli's dead <i>Christus</i>.
His sunken eye-pits were of morbid hue, and the light
in his eyes had waned. The angular hollows and lines
of his aged ancestors had succeeded to their reign in
his face twenty years before their time.
<br/>"I was ill over there, you know," he said. "I am all
right now."
<br/>As if, however, to falsify this assertion, his legs
seemed to give way, and he suddenly sat down to save
himself from falling. It was only a slight attack of
faintness, resulting from the tedious day's journey,
and the excitement of arrival.
<br/>"Has any letter come for me lately?" he asked.
"I received the last you sent on by the merest chance,
and after considerable delay through being inland;
or I might have come sooner."
<br/>"It was from your wife, we supposed?"
<br/>"It was."
<br/>Only one other had recently come. They had not sent it
on to him, knowing he would start for home so soon.
<br/>He hastily opened the letter produced, and was much
disturbed to read in Tess's handwriting the sentiments
expressed in her last hurried scrawl to him.
<br/><br/><br/>
<blockquote><blockquote>
<br/>O why have you treated me so monstrously, Angel! I do
not deserve it. I have thought it all over carefully,
and I can never, never forgive you! You know that I
did not intend to wrong you—why have you so wronged
me? You are cruel, cruel indeed! I will try to forget
you. It is all injustice I have received at your
hands!<br/>
T.<br/>
</blockquote></blockquote>
<br/>
<br/>"It is quite true!" said Angel, throwing down the
letter. "Perhaps she will never be reconciled to me!"
<br/>"Don't, Angel, be so anxious about a mere child of the
soil!" said his mother.
<br/>"Child of the soil! Well, we all are children of the
soil. I wish she were so in the sense you mean; but
let me now explain to you what I have never explained
before, that her father is a descendant in the male
line of one of the oldest Norman houses, like a good
many others who lead obscure agricultural lives in our
villages, and are dubbed 'sons of the soil.'"
<br/>He soon retired to bed; and the next morning, feeling
exceedingly unwell, he remained in his room pondering.
The circumstances amid which he had left Tess were such
that though, while on the south of the Equator and just
in receipt of her loving epistle, it had seemed the
easiest thing in the world to rush back into her arms
the moment he chose to forgive her, now that he had
arrived it was not so easy as it had seemed. She was
passionate, and her present letter, showing that her
estimate of him had changed under his delay—too justly
changed, he sadly owned,—made him ask himself if it
would be wise to confront her unannounced in the
presence of her parents. Supposing that her love had
indeed turned to dislike during the last weeks of
separation, a sudden meeting might lead to bitter
words.
<br/>Clare therefore thought it would be best to prepare
Tess and her family by sending a line to Marlott
announcing his return, and his hope that she was still
living with them there, as he had arranged for her to
do when he left England. He despatched the inquiry
that very day, and before the week was out there came a
short reply from Mrs Durbeyfield which did not remove
his embarrassment, for it bore no address, though to
his surprise it was not written from Marlott.
<br/><br/><br/>
<blockquote><blockquote>
<span class="smallcaps">Sir</span>,
<br/>J write these few lines to say that my Daughter is away
from me at present, and J am not sure when she will
return, but J will let you know as Soon as she do.
J do not feel at liberty to tell you Where she is
temperly biding. J should say that me and my Family
have left Marlott for some Time.—<br/>
<br/>
Yours,<br/>
<br/>
<span class="smallcaps">J. Durbeyfield</span><br/>
</blockquote></blockquote>
<br/>
<br/>It was such a relief to Clare to learn that Tess was at
least apparently well that her mother's stiff reticence
as to her whereabouts did not long distress him. They
were all angry with him, evidently. He would wait till
Mrs Durbeyfield could inform him of Tess's return,
which her letter implied to be soon. He deserved no
more. His had been a love "which alters when it
alteration finds". He had undergone some strange
experiences in his absence; he had seen the virtual
Faustina in the literal Cornelia, a spiritual Lucretia
in a corporeal Phryne; he had thought of the woman
taken and set in the midst as one deserving to be
stoned, and of the wife of Uriah being made a queen;
and he had asked himself why he had not judged Tess
constructively rather than biographically, by the will
rather than by the deed?
<br/>A day or two passed while he waited at his father's
house for the promised second note from Joan
Durbeyfield, and indirectly to recover a little more
strength. The strength showed signs of coming back,
but there was no sign of Joan's letter. Then he hunted
up the old letter sent on to him in Brazil, which Tess
had written from Flintcomb-Ash, and re-read it. The
sentences touched him now as much as when he had first
perused them.
<br/><br/><br/>
<blockquote><blockquote>
…I must cry to you in my trouble—I have no one
else! … I think I must die if you do not come
soon, or tell me to come to you… please, please,
not to be just—only a little kind to me … If you
would come, I could die in your arms! I would be well
content to do that if so be you had forgiven me! …
if you will send me one little line, and say, "I am
coming soon," I will bide on, Angel—O, so cheerfully!
… think how it do hurt my heart not to see you
ever—ever! Ah, if I could only make your dear heart
ache one little minute of each day as mine does every
day and all day long, it might lead you to show pity to
your poor lonely one. … I would be content, ay,
glad, to live with you as your servant, if I may not as
your wife; so that I could only be near you, and get
glimpses of you, and think of you as mine. …
I long for only one thing in heaven or earth or under
the earth, to meet you, my own dear! Come to me—come
to me, and save me from what threatens me!
</blockquote></blockquote>
<br/>
<br/>Clare determined that he would no longer believe in her
more recent and severer regard of him, but would go and
find her immediately. He asked his father if she had
applied for any money during his absence. His father
returned a negative, and then for the first time it
occurred to Angel that her pride had stood in her way,
and that she had suffered privation. From his remarks
his parents now gathered the real reason of the
separation; and their Christianity was such that,
reprobates being their especial care, the tenderness
towards Tess which her blood, her simplicity, even her
poverty, had not engendered, was instantly excited by
her sin.
<br/>Whilst he was hastily packing together a few articles
for his journey he glanced over a poor plain missive
also lately come to hand—the one from Marian and Izz
Huett, beginning—
<br/>"Honour'd Sir, Look to your Wife if you do love her
as much as she do love you," and signed, "From Two
Well-Wishers."
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LIV
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<br/>In a quarter of an hour Clare was leaving the house,
whence his mother watched his thin figure as it
disappeared into the street. He had declined to borrow
his father's old mare, well knowing of its necessity to
the household. He went to the inn, where he hired a
trap, and could hardly wait during the harnessing. In
a very few minutes after, he was driving up the hill out
of the town which, three or four months earlier in the
year, Tess had descended with such hopes and ascended
with such shattered purposes.
<br/>Benvill Lane soon stretched before him, its hedges and
trees purple with buds; but he was looking at other
things, and only recalled himself to the scene
sufficiently to enable him to keep the way. In
something less than an hour-and-a-half he had skirted
the south of the King's Hintock estates and ascended to
the untoward solitude of Cross-in-Hand, the unholy
stone whereon Tess had been compelled by Alec
d'Urberville, in his whim of reformation, to swear the
strange oath that she would never wilfully tempt him
again. The pale and blasted nettle-stems of the
preceding year even now lingered nakedly in the banks,
young green nettles of the present spring growing from
their roots.
<br/>Thence he went along the verge of the upland
overhanging the other Hintocks, and, turning to the
right, plunged into the bracing calcareous region of
Flintcomb-Ash, the address from which she had written
to him in one of the letters, and which he supposed to
be the place of sojourn referred to by her mother.
Here, of course, he did not find her; and what added to
his depression was the discovery that no "Mrs Clare"
had ever been heard of by the cottagers or by the
farmer himself, though Tess was remembered well enough
by her Christian name. His name she had obviously
never used during their separation, and her dignified
sense of their total severance was shown not much less
by this abstention than by the hardships she had chosen
to undergo (of which he now learnt for the first time)
rather than apply to his father for more funds.
<br/>From this place they told him Tess Durbeyfield had
gone, without due notice, to the home of her parents on
the other side of Blackmoor, and it therefore became
necessary to find Mrs Durbeyfield. She had told him
she was not now at Marlott, but had been curiously
reticent as to her actual address, and the only course
was to go to Marlott and inquire for it. The farmer
who had been so churlish with Tess was quite
smooth-tongued to Clare, and lent him a horse and man
to drive him towards Marlott, the gig he had arrived in
being sent back to Emminster; for the limit of a day's
journey with that horse was reached.
<br/>Clare would not accept the loan of the farmer's vehicle
for a further distance than to the outskirts of the
Vale, and, sending it back with the man who had driven
him, he put up at an inn, and next day entered on foot
the region wherein was the spot of his dear Tess's
birth. It was as yet too early in the year for much
colour to appear in the gardens and foliage; the
so-called spring was but winter overlaid with a thin
coat of greenness, and it was of a parcel with his
expectations.
<br/>The house in which Tess had passed the years of her
childhood was now inhabited by another family who had
never known her. The new residents were in the garden,
taking as much interest in their own doings as if the
homestead had never passed its primal time in
conjunction with the histories of others, beside which
the histories of these were but as a tale told by an
idiot. They walked about the garden paths with
thoughts of their own concerns entirely uppermost,
bringing their actions at every moment in jarring
collision with the dim ghosts behind them, talking as
though the time when Tess lived there were not one whit
intenser in story than now. Even the spring birds sang
over their heads as if they thought there was nobody
missing in particular.
<br/>On inquiry of these precious innocents, to whom even
the name of their predecessors was a failing memory,
Clare learned that John Durbeyfield was dead; that his
widow and children had left Marlott, declaring that
they were going to live at Kingsbere, but instead of
doing so had gone on to another place they mentioned.
By this time Clare abhorred the house for ceasing to
contain Tess, and hastened away from its hated presence
without once looking back.
<br/>His way was by the field in which he had first beheld
her at the dance. It was as bad as the house—even
worse. He passed on through the churchyard, where,
amongst the new headstones, he saw one of a somewhat
superior design to the rest. The inscription ran thus:
<br/><br/><br/>
<blockquote><blockquote>
<br/><span class="inscription3">In memory of John
Durbeyfield, rightly d'Urberville, of
the once powerful family of that Name, and Direct
Descendant through an illustrious Line from Sir Pagan
d'Urberville, one of the Knights of the Conqueror. Died
March 10th, 18—</span><br/>
<br/>
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<span class="inscription">How Are the Mighty Fallen</span>.<br/>
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</blockquote></blockquote>
<br/>
<br/>Some man, apparently the sexton, had observed Clare
standing there, and drew nigh. "Ah, sir, now that's a
man who didn't want to lie here, but wished to be
carried to Kingsbere, where his ancestors be."
<br/>"And why didn't they respect his wish?"
<br/>"Oh—no money. Bless your soul, sir, why—there,
I wouldn't wish to say it everywhere, but—even this
headstone, for all the flourish wrote upon en, is not
paid for."
<br/>"Ah, who put it up?"
<br/>The man told the name of a mason in the village, and,
on leaving the churchyard, Clare called at the mason's
house. He found that the statement was true, and paid
the bill. This done, he turned in the direction of the
migrants.
<br/>The distance was too long for a walk, but Clare felt
such a strong desire for isolation that at first he
would neither hire a conveyance nor go to a circuitous
line of railway by which he might eventually reach the
place. At Shaston, however, he found he must hire; but
the way was such that he did not enter Joan's place
till about seven o'clock in the evening, having
traversed a distance of over twenty miles since leaving
Marlott.
<br/>The village being small he had little difficulty
in finding Mrs Durbeyfield's tenement, which
was a house in a walled garden, remote from the main
road, where she had stowed away her clumsy old
furniture as best she could. It was plain that for
some reason or other she had not wished him to visit
her, and he felt his call to be somewhat of an
intrusion. She came to the door herself, and the light
from the evening sky fell upon her face.
<br/>This was the first time that Clare had ever met her,
but he was too preoccupied to observe more than that
she was still a handsome woman, in the garb of a
respectable widow. He was obliged to explain that he
was Tess's husband, and his object in coming there, and
he did it awkwardly enough. "I want to see her at
once," he added. "You said you would write to me
again, but you have not done so."
<br/>"Because she've not come home," said Joan.
<br/>"Do you know if she is well?"
<br/>"I don't. But you ought to, sir," said she.
<br/>"I admit it. Where is she staying?"
<br/>From the beginning of the interview Joan had disclosed
her embarrassment by keeping her hand to the side of
her cheek.
<br/>"I—don't know exactly where she is staying," she
answered. "She was—but—"
<br/>"Where was she?"
<br/>"Well, she is not there now."
<br/>In her evasiveness she paused again, and the younger
children had by this time crept to the door, where,
pulling at his mother's skirts, the youngest
murmured—
<br/>"Is this the gentleman who is going to marry Tess?"
<br/>"He has married her," Joan whispered. "Go inside."
<br/>Clare saw her efforts for reticence, and asked—
<br/>"Do you think Tess would wish me to try and find her?
If not, of course—"
<br/>"I don't think she would."
<br/>"Are you sure?"
<br/>"I am sure she wouldn't."
<br/>He was turning away; and then he thought of Tess's
tender letter.
<br/>"I am sure she would!" he retorted passionately.
"I know her better than you do."
<br/>"That's very likely, sir; for I have never really known
her."
<br/>"Please tell me her address, Mrs Durbeyfield, in
kindness to a lonely wretched man!" Tess's mother again
restlessly swept her cheek with her vertical hand, and
seeing that he suffered, she at last said, is a low
voice—
<br/>"She is at Sandbourne."
<br/>"Ah—where there? Sandbourne has become a large place,
they say."
<br/>"I don't know more particularly than I have
said—Sandbourne. For myself, I was never there."
<br/>It was apparent that Joan spoke the truth in this, and
he pressed her no further.
<br/>"Are you in want of anything?" he said gently.
<br/>"No, sir," she replied. "We are fairly well provided
for."
<br/>Without entering the house Clare turned away. There
was a station three miles ahead, and paying off his
coachman, he walked thither. The last train to
Sandbourne left shortly after, and it bore Clare on its
wheels.
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