<h2><SPAN name="CHAPTER_V" id="CHAPTER_V">CHAPTER V.</SPAN></h2>
<h3>A DISCOVERY.</h3>
<p>There was a dinner-party that evening at the
Grange. It was given on account of Ashton, now well
known in Redborough; and Catherine Vernon had
taken the trouble to go herself to beg Captain
Morgan to be of the party: but the old man had
refused steadily.</p>
<p>"I will have none of your fine company," he said.
"No, no; you do enough for me here. When you
come to see us it always is a pleasure, both to my old
woman and me: but a dinner, no. I have not had
on my evening coat this dozen of years. It's not
likely it would be in the fashion now."</p>
<p>"What does it matter about fashion? You shall
come as you are if you would like that better,"
Catherine said; but she did not mean it, and of
that they were all perfectly aware. "It is to do
honour to Roland. You are no longer so anxious
to separate yourself from Roland as when he came
here first," she said.</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_86" id="Page_86">[Pg 86]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>The old man did not say anything, but his wife
answered for him.</p>
<p>"We will not commit ourselves, Catherine, you
know our way; but we think the boy does us credit.
I think it might be that if we were left to ourselves
we might even do a little match-making for him if
we could."</p>
<p>"Are you come to that?" said Catherine: but
there was an echo of a sigh in her voice. "That
seems to me to mean a confession—that we are not
enough for them any longer, but still that we will
not give in; we will be enough for them in another
way."</p>
<p>"Why should we be enough for them? We could
not think that was possible, living far off as we do,
and in a different way. No, but out of pure love,
which is just as foolish as anything else. I am the
wisest in this respect, for I know it will not do."</p>
<p>"And who is the lady?" Catherine asked with a
smile.</p>
<p>The next moment she saw very well who it was,
for they did not make her any reply. Old Mrs.
Morgan folding her hands said quietly, "It will
never answer," and the captain, leaving the mantelpiece
against which he had been leaning with his
face fully presented to her questioning, went and sat
down in his usual place near the window, which
afforded no such facilities to a penetrating eye.
They did not mean to tell her, and she knew.
She laughed to carry off the little annoyance with
which this preference and prejudice, as she called it,<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_87" id="Page_87">[Pg 87]</SPAN></span>
always moved her, and said, "You should exert
yourself in his sister's favour; by all she tells me she
would not be ungrateful," in a way which communicated
the annoyance she felt back again to her
friends.</p>
<p>"We will not meddle with Emma," said old Mrs.
Morgan. "I am tempted to think sometimes that
the blood gets thin in a race when it runs too long,
like the last cup of my tea—which he says is just
hot water."</p>
<p>"Not so, not so," said old Captain Morgan. "You
are growing a materialist in your old age; that is
sometimes just the very essence and cream of all. In
story-books, when there are an old couple left like
you and me, the last child left with them to make
them happy is a creature that is perfect."</p>
<p>"Oh, this is heresy indeed," cried Catherine. "I
will not have you compare Emma to your last cup of
tea. There is nobody I meet with so original; and
is she to stay longer and have her chance? or has
she come to the height of her desires and persuaded
the gentleman to speak—there is nothing I want so
much to know."</p>
<p>But here Catherine became vaguely sensible of a
sentiment which, according to their own account,
had died out long ago in these old people. They
had declared themselves above prejudice in respect
to their own flesh and blood. The captain indeed
had thrown off all responsibility, and announced at
Roland's first coming that he was not prepared to
answer for him: and Emma had not been so<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_88" id="Page_88">[Pg 88]</SPAN></span>
congenial to them as Roland. Notwithstanding, when
their grandchild was thus freely criticised it galled
them both. The old lady betrayed a little rising
colour of vexation and shame, and Captain Morgan
got up again restlessly and went and stood against
the window, shutting out half the light, and turning
his back—which was a very strong step, though but
for a moment—upon his guest.</p>
<p>"She has not been brought up like other girls,"
said Mrs. Morgan. "Perhaps it was none of our
duty; it is hard to say. We knew nothing of her:
poor little motherless thing, we might have brought
her away with us; but these are all questions it is
little use going into now. Such as she is, she is a
good girl in her way. When she is married, for she
will be sure to marry, she will make a good, careful
wife."</p>
<p>"One would think I had been saying harm of
Emma," cried Catherine, with some quickness; "when
the fact is I am one of those that like her most.
She is the most piquant variety of her species.
There is nobody that amuses me so much. She
knows what she wants, which so few do, and she
means to have it. She is quite honest and straight-forward.
You do me injustice in this."</p>
<p>There was nothing said in reply, and Catherine
did not like the position. Perhaps the universal
submission to which she was accustomed had spoilt
her, though she was so sure of seeing through it.
She got up to go away.</p>
<p>"I must do without you then, uncle, if I am not<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_89" id="Page_89">[Pg 89]</SPAN></span>
to have you; though I think it is a little hard upon
me—and upon Roland too."</p>
<p>"We are always here when you want us, Catherine;
as much as is in us is always at your service.
It is not much," said the old man, hobbling after her
to the door; "but your fine house and your fine
people are not in <i>her</i> way nor in mine. And what
should I do going back to the world, and <i>her</i> in the
arm-chair? You see yourself that would never do."</p>
<p>"It would delight her!" said Catherine, pausing
at the door; "you know that. Fancy her keeping
you by her because she is not able to go out too!
It almost looks as if—but that is impossible—you
did not understand a woman yet."</p>
<p>The old captain laughed and shook his white
head.</p>
<p>"Persuade yourself that!" he said; "make yourself
think that: that will chime in with the general
opinion, Catherine. If I were an old man on the
stage I would say, there's no understanding women.
If I don't understand her and all her ways, I am a
sillier old blockhead than you think."</p>
<p>"Then you know that what I say is true—that
she would like you to come—that it would please
her——"</p>
<p>"Then it is she that is the silly old woman that
does not understand her old man," Captain Morgan
said.</p>
<p>Catherine left them with the impression that they
were in a mood beyond her comprehension. It was
a fine, clear, almost warm day, and the roads dry<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_90" id="Page_90">[Pg 90]</SPAN></span>
and walking pleasant. She had come on foot, as
was not very usual with her, and meant to walk
home. She set out on her return waving her hand
to Mrs. Morgan, but in no very cheerful frame of
mind. She had not been cheerful when she left
home. Her mind misgave her as it had not done
before for more years than she could count. What was
the reason she could scarcely tell. Edward was not
really less kind, less observant of her comfort. The
change she saw in him was one indescribable, which
no one else would have suspected, which in all
probability existed in her imagination alone. Why
should she suppose evils that had no existence?
There was no one like him, no son so dutiful to
his mother, no one so ready to make any sacrifice
for the pleasure of his home. If his looks had been
a little abstracted lately, if he had spent his time
away from her, if his work in his own room, which
she had made so comfortable for him, which she had
been so anxious to assure him the exclusive proprietorship
of, had increased of late, perhaps this
was merely the natural course of events. Or if he
had fallen in love—what then? Did the boy perhaps
think that she would be jealous and stand in
the way of his happiness? How little he knew!
Provided only his choice was a right one; she would
open her arms and her heart. She would be ready
to do anything for their comfort. There was no
sacrifice she would not gladly make. Notwithstanding
that somewhat nonsensical mystical flourish of
the old captain's about his understanding of his<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_91" id="Page_91">[Pg 91]</SPAN></span>
wife, Catherine believed, and with much show of
truth, that men rarely understood women, and never
knew how ready they were to arrange everything, to
give up everything for the comfort and pleasure of
those they loved. What a welcome she would
herself give to Edward's wife, though he was
trembling and putting off and afraid to tell her!
What a reception that young woman should have!
Provided always—but with Edward's good taste
and good sense how could he go wrong in such a
choice?</p>
<p>It was at this moment that a shuffling light step
became audible, hurrying along the road, and a voice
calling "Catherine—is it really Catherine?" followed
by another step and another voice, with a
fainter sound in the repetition, but also calling upon
"Catherine!" Catherine Vernon paused and looked
round, her face losing its gravity and brightening
into its usual humorous look of half-contemptuous
toleration.</p>
<p>"It is Catherine!" cried Miss Vernon-Ridgway;
"I told you so. Dear Catherine, isn't this long walk
too much for you, and on such a cold day? Take
my arm—please take my arm: or won't you come
back to our little house and rest, and we'll send for
the carriage? It is a long walk for us who are not
used to luxury, and what must it be to you?"</p>
<p>It was true that the Miss Vernon-Ridgways were
under fifty, and Catherine was sixty-five; but she
was far more vigorous than they were, and more
capable of exercise. She turned round upon them<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_92" id="Page_92">[Pg 92]</SPAN></span>
smiling, but kept her arms close by her side, and
refused any support.</p>
<p>"I assure you," she said, "I am quite capable of
walking. You know I have always been accustomed
to exercise."</p>
<p>"Ah yes," said the sisters, "you were brought up
sensibly, dear Catherine, not spoiled darlings as we
were. We have never quite got over it, though we
should have known better long ago, if experience
was all: no one can tell how we miss our carriage;
and when we see you on foot, who can command
every ease, it quite wounds our feelings," said Miss
Martha, coming in at the end in a little provocation
by herself.</p>
<p>"It is very kind of you: but it does not at all
hurt my feelings. This is a fine day for a walk,
and I hope you are enjoying yours, as I do," said
Catherine, with her laughing look.</p>
<p>They both shook their heads.</p>
<p>"We do what we have to do, and I hope we don't
complain. But I declare I feel hurt that you should
have been at the Heronry and not paid us a visit.
I wish not to be jealous. You were no doubt talking
things over with Mrs. John?"</p>
<p>"I know nothing that there is to talk over with
Mrs. John," said Catherine, tartly. "I was visiting
my old uncle, which is a duty I never like to neglect."</p>
<p>"Oh!" said one sister, and "Ah!" said the other.
Then they cried eagerly each to each, "I knew it
was a vile story. Of course we have been
misinformed."</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_93" id="Page_93">[Pg 93]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>"What was there to be misinformed about?" said
Catherine; then as she looked from one to another,
a sensation of coming trouble shot across her. "And
what," she added with a smile not so easy as the former
one, "am I supposed to have to say to Mrs. John?"</p>
<p>"Oh, it was all an accident of course," said Miss
Matilda. "But you might tell Catherine all the
same. It is best that people should know; and
then they know what steps to take," said Miss
Martha. "To be sure Catherine would know what
steps to take," Matilda added again.</p>
<p>"This may all be very amusing," said Catherine,
"but as I don't know the word of the puzzle, I don't
see the joke, you know. One would think something
had happened in which I was concerned."</p>
<p>"I am not sure if you would think anything had
happened. Oh yes, I am sure we thought so last
night," cried the sisters one after another. "You see
the least little thing looks important when you are
going to bed—after eleven o'clock at night."</p>
<p>"What was this great event?" said Catherine,
with a certain sternness in her tone.</p>
<p>There was a great flutter of nods and looks
between the sisters. They came close to her, one
on either side, and Miss Matilda, always the boldest,
put a hand to Catherine's elbow by way of supporting
her if support were needed.</p>
<p>"Dear Catherine, do turn back with us to our
little place! it is close by, and we can give you
an easy chair and a cup of tea. You will bear it
better there than here."</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_94" id="Page_94">[Pg 94]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>"Did you say <i>bear</i> it better?"</p>
<p>"Oh! did I say it—<i>bear</i> it—Martha? I am sure
I don't know. I think I said hear it, Catherine.
Oh! for Heaven's sake don't look so stern. Perhaps
you will think nothing of it——"</p>
<p>Catherine gave her foot a stamp upon the ground.
She said—</p>
<p>"Tell me at once what you have got to tell," in a
voice which was almost threatening. They looked
at each other again, and then Miss Matilda
began—</p>
<p>"I don't want to get any one into trouble, I am
sure," she said in a faltering but eager voice. "It
frightened us so—that was the thing. It frightened
us about you. I said to Martha, 'Dear Catherine
must be ill; nothing less than that would bring him
here at such an hour.' You see the voices roused us
just as we were going to bed. Mrs. John's door was
locked, for I had heard her do it; she always does it
herself, and, judging by her usual hours, she must
have been in bed—when we heard voices at the
gate: oh, I was not surprised at that. Sometimes
it is old Captain Morgan himself, who I am sure,
with every respect for him, ought not to be out
of doors at such hours; sometimes the young gentleman,
the grandson—I don't remember his name;
or it used to be Harry Vernon in his time. We all
know that girl; we needn't say anything more on
that subject. I merely remarked, 'There she is at
the gate again.' And Martha said——"</p>
<p>"Oh, I said, 'Fiddlesticks, she is at the ball; it<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_95" id="Page_95">[Pg 95]</SPAN></span>
must be one of the maids.' I am so unsuspicious,"
said Miss Martha.</p>
<p>"And then we listened as you may suppose.
There was just a little corner of the window open.
Of course if it had been one of the maids I should
have thought it my duty—— Catherine, you are
getting quite tired."</p>
<p>"I freely confess, yes—of your story. What do I
care for your maids and their lovers? You can
settle these surely without me."</p>
<p>"Oh, if you will only wait a little! Very soon
we could hear that it was, if you please, Miss
Hester's voice, and she was inviting some one in.
Oh, pressing him—almost forcing him. Shouldn't
you say so Martha? like the woman in the <i>Pilgrim's
Progress</i>."</p>
<p>"Yes, just like that kind of woman. Won't you
come in, just for a moment—just to rest a bit," said
Martha, changing her voice into a sort of squeak of
the most unseductive kind. "And he resisted as
long as he could; but she would take no denial.
You can't expect a young man to say 'No' if a girl
puts herself at his feet like that. So he yielded at
last, poor young fellow. We didn't blame him a bit,
did we, Martha?"</p>
<p>"Oh, not a bit! poor young man, with such a
creature as that laying herself out——"</p>
<p>"And who was this whom you are so sorry for?"
Catherine said.</p>
<p>As if she did not know! She had been rather
glad of all the delays and <i>longueurs</i> of the tale, and<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_96" id="Page_96">[Pg 96]</SPAN></span>
marched along through it, glad to make them out of
breath, almost hoping to be at her own door before
the crisis; but in this she did not succeed. She did
not look at them even, but kept her eyes upon the
path with steady indifference.</p>
<p>"Dear Catherine!—but you won't blame him,
poor young fellow! It was your own Edward, that
dear boy——"</p>
<p>Prepared as she was, the name gave her a shock, as
perhaps Miss Matilda, still holding her elbow, felt;
but if so, it was only for a moment. "Edward!"
she said with a laugh. "You mean Harry, I
suppose? Edward was at home and busy, occupying
himself in a very different sort of way."</p>
<p>At this the sisters interchanged glances again, and
shook their heads in unison. "Ah, Catherine, that
is just how you are deceived. We know Harry
Vernon's voice very well. It was Edward."</p>
<p>Catherine turned upon them with a countenance
perfectly cloudless, a laugh upon her lips. "When
I tell you," she said, "that he was in my own
house! he could not, I think, be in two places at
once—my house, his house—it is all the same. He
was at home—" she added after a moment, in a
deeper tone, "and with me."</p>
<p>"Oh! with you!" The sisters broke off with
sudden fright, not venturing to persevere. So
sudden a check quenched Miss Matilda's lively
genius altogether. It was her sister, the practical
member, who added with a spasmodic gasp, "Oh,
of course, Catherine, if he was with you——"</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_97" id="Page_97">[Pg 97]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>"Yes, of course he was with me; he is only too
attentive. I could wish he took a little more
amusement. So your fine story is at an end, you
see. If it had been any one else I might have
thought it my duty to inquire into it; but as I can
prove it not to be Edward—not that I see much
harm in it if it had been Edward," she added,
turning upon the accusers again. "I am not fond
of Hester Vernon, but she is his cousin all the
same."</p>
<p>"Oh, no harm! oh, I never thought so," cried the
gossips, alarmed and faltering. "It was only just—it
was merely—it frightened us, thinking that dear
Catherine must be ill, or something happened——"</p>
<p>"Did you think then that your dear Catherine, if
she were ill, would send for Hester Vernon?—as her
prime favourite, I suppose, and the one that loved
her best among all those who——"</p>
<p>Catherine paused; the native magnanimity in her,
beneath all the pettiness which her laughing cynicism
had taught her, would not insult even these heartless
women by a reminder in so many words of their dependence.
It cost her all her strength to stand up
erect before them, and put off their assault. They
had got at her heart, but they should never know
it. She stood ample and serene between the two
slim shabby figures and smiled defiance. Never
were talebearers more completely discomfited. They
turned upon each other with mutual reproaches
in the confusion of the moment. "You need not
have made such a fuss, Matilda." "I told you,<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_98" id="Page_98">[Pg 98]</SPAN></span>
Martha, you oughtn't to be so confident about a
voice."</p>
<p>"Come," said Catherine, "we had better say
nothing more about it; evidently there has been
a mistake. Hester, who ought to be more careful
if she is to live at the Vernonry, must have another
admirer with whose voice you are not acquainted.
But it is unwise to form conclusions on no better
ground than the sound of a voice, and perhaps not
very charitable or kind of you, so much older than
she is, to tell anything that is uncomfortable about
that girl, who is no favourite of mine already, to
me. Don't you think you would do better if you
warned her, or her mother?" Catherine's countenance
was so calm, her eyes so commanding, that
the Miss Vernon-Ridgways, altogether defeated in
their malicious intention, which was chiefly to wound
herself, felt their knees tremble under them, and
were genuinely awe-stricken for perhaps the first
time in their lives.</p>
<p>"Oh, as for that—it was not Hester we were
thinking of—it was you," they faltered between
them, "that you might not allow—or be exposed—"
Their words got incoherent and ran away to nothing,
into breaks and frightened lapses. And when
Catherine, opening her eyes still wider, said, "For
me! to warn me!" and laughed them to scorn,
Matilda, who being the most forward was at the
same time the most sensitive, was so overcome by
anger and alarm and mortification that she began
to cry for sheer despite, and felt in her inmost<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_99" id="Page_99">[Pg 99]</SPAN></span>
heart that she hated the woman who could humiliate
her so.</p>
<p>"You were kindly afraid that I should be tired a
few minutes ago: and standing does tire me, though
I like a walk," Catherine said. "I will say good-bye
now. Perhaps you meant it kindly; and if so,
I'll thank you too—all the more as it's a mistake—for
that is the best of it," she said with a laugh,
waving her hand: and leaving them, walked on
homewards with an alert and energetic step. But
it would have been balm to their feelings if they
had been able to see how very little like laughter
was her face when she had once turned her back
upon them. There was nobody to observe her along
that quiet road. The nursemaids with their children
had all turned townwards some time ago. There
was not a soul between her and the gate of the
Grange. Catherine's face lengthened and darkened
as if by a sudden effect of years; the sanguine life
and confidence and force went out of it. She looked
an old woman in that moment, as indeed she had a
right to do, but did not, nature interposing for her
aid. She said to herself that she would not think,
would not ask herself what it meant until she should
get home, and could feel the shelter of her own
walls about her. She wanted shelter and privacy
before she faced the fact which had been dimly
shadowing before her, but never in this form. She
was a very resolute woman, and had not come so far
in life without having to confront and overcome
many things that looked terrible enough at the first<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_100" id="Page_100">[Pg 100]</SPAN></span>
glance. But never since those early days which
were so far off that they were half forgotten had
she been called upon to face those troubles which
sap the strength out of heart and will, the disappointments
and bitterness brought upon us by
those we love. She had few of these sufferings for
what seems the saddest reason, that she had nobody
to love. But it was not so sad as it appears. She
had a number of people whom she loved well
enough to be delighted by their prosperities, and
overcast by their troubles. She had all the advantages
of affection without being so closely knit to
any as to have its drawbacks too. But this easy
position changed when she became, so to speak, the
mother of Edward Vernon. It was not the doing of
providence, it was her own doing. She had taken it
upon herself, and for years past she had said to
herself that the boy had made her know, as she had
never known before, what happiness was. But now
here was, swinging round slowly, revealing itself to
her in glimpses, the reverse of the medal, the other
side of the picture. Was he deceiving her? She
had taken up his defence boldly, not caring what she
said: but she had believed what she heard all the
same, and had known it to be true. Was this why
he had not cared to see her, to bid her good-night,
before he came out to have that meeting with Hester—like
a shopgirl and shopboy, she said to herself,
her lip quivering with passion, vexation, derision, all
bound together by the pain that produced them—at
the gate? The commonplace character of the<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_101" id="Page_101">[Pg 101]</SPAN></span>
meeting, the look of petty intrigue in it, humbled
her pride in her boy. If they had met at Ellen's
dance, or in any legitimate way, she thought it
would not have mortified her so much—but like
a lady's maid and a footman, like Jane the scullery-girl
and her young man! She laughed to herself
at the thought, but the laugh was more painful
than tears.</p>
<p>By and by, however, Catherine came to take a
little comfort out of the fact that Edward had not
come to bid her good-night. Not considering for a
moment that any incident of all this might be
accidental, though everything was so, she concluded
that his heart had failed him, that he had felt
himself incapable of the treachery of kissing her
cheek in the usual tender way when about to do
a thing which he knew would be so displeasing to
her. When this occurred to Catherine the whole
aspect of the matter changed: her features relaxed,
her colour came back. This, no doubt, was how it
had been. The girl had met him at Ellen's folly—how
truly a folly had never been proved till now:
and she was pretty and clever. Catherine was too
proud to deny her her natural advantages; and men
were fools, as was well known—the best of them,
the wisest of them!—where women were concerned.
She had led him into some engagement, some light
wager perhaps, some defiance of what he would
venture to do. And Edward had been silly enough
to be led away. She did not want him to be too
wise. If he was silly, it was no more than everybody<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_102" id="Page_102">[Pg 102]</SPAN></span>
else had been before him. But he, dear boy,
true boy, having involved himself in a piece of
folly, had shown that high respect to her, that he
would rather let her suppose he had forgotten and
neglected her, than come to her with the usual
greeting when he knew he was doing something
which would seem treachery to Catherine. Thus
she, who for the first moment had known no wish
but that of pushing homeward and hiding her
sudden downfall within her own house where
nobody could intrude upon her, had so triumphantly
explained all that trouble away before she got home,
that she entered the Grange radiant, with no sense
of having a downfall to hide. The casuistry of love
is more skilful than any device of philosophy. She
explained everything to herself. She wondered that
she had not read it in his face all the evening.
She felt that it had been there, if she had only
had eyes to see. A foolish talk carried a trifle too
far—a bold girl, not bad, no, not bad—that was not
necessary, and Catherine would be just—pleased to
get a little triumph when she could over the other
side: and a foolish promise, not intended, had drawn
him, perhaps against his will. By this subtle
demonstration—which no faculty less keen than that
of love could have made—Catherine proved, to her
full satisfaction, the fundamental truth in him which
no little trumpery deceit (of a kind so innocent as
this!) could undermine. All this fine fabric was
raised on the most insignificant foundation of fact.
But what did that matter? it was enough. And if<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_103" id="Page_103">[Pg 103]</SPAN></span>
Catherine had been told that Edward's forgetfulness
of the good-night had been accidental, and that his
meeting with Hester was accidental, and that no
incident of the night had been planned beforehand,
she would have simply and flatly denied the possibility.
She knew better; and she preferred the
matter as it stood.</p>
<p>The dinner-party was an insignificant affair to
her after this. She did full justice to it, and to
Roland Ashton, the chief guest, the man whom she
delighted to honour, and for whose pleasure and
profit the best people in Redborough were called
together. He was already known to many of them,
and it was Catherine's pleasure to make her relationship
and interest in the young visitor clear.
But her mind was eager to get through the
commonplace courtesies of the evening—to come
to the moment when Edward and she should meet
alone. She could not pass her discovery over
without note. She would tell him what she had
heard, and what she had divined. She would give
him the tender warning which such an affection
as hers had a right to offer. If it was more than
a passing flirtation (which she did not believe), to
beg him to reconsider it; if his heart should be
touched (which Heaven forbid! but the thought
made her smile, it was so profoundly unlikely), to
intreat him to reflect, and see how little satisfaction
could come to him from such intercourse. She went
over and over again the interview that was to come—so
often, indeed, that she exhausted it, and when<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_104" id="Page_104">[Pg 104]</SPAN></span>
the moment did come, did not remember half of
what she intended to say. It came, indeed, in a
way entirely contrary to that she had imagined.
After the party had dispersed, Edward took Roland
into his room to smoke with him—which she ought
to have recollected he was in the habit of doing—and
then, what was more disappointing still, went
out with him to accompany him part of the way.
She was going down stairs to Edward's room, that
she might get these explanations off her mind
without a moment's delay, and was taken entirely
by surprise when she heard the door close, and two
voices continuing outside.</p>
<p>"Has Mr. Edward gone out?" she asked, with
a trembling she could scarcely control, of the butler,
when he came up to put out the lights.</p>
<p>"I was to say, ma'am, as he'd be back in half an
hour," said the man.</p>
<p>Catherine sent her maid to bed, and kept her
particular lamp burning on her little table, waiting
there in the dimness of the large deserted room,
hearing every crackle and rustle of the night. It
seemed to her far more than half an hour before
she heard Edward's key in the door; but she was
resolved not to be balked now. She had no idea,
poor lady, that he thought her suspicious, inquisitive,
and watchful, making domiciliary visits in order to
find him out in something, which was very far from
Catherine's disposition. She went down accordingly
to lose no time, and met him in the hall. He was
astonished to see her, as was natural enough; and<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_105" id="Page_105">[Pg 105]</SPAN></span>
she had an uneasy tremor upon her, which was
natural too, but which looked like cold. He was
full of apologies for having kept her up.</p>
<p>"If I had known you would have waited for me,
Aunt Catherine——"</p>
<p>"You did not say good-night to me last night,
Edward. I did not like that to happen two nights
running. I will go into your room, not to hurry
you up stairs."</p>
<p>"I can't think how that happened," he said,
following her into the cosy room, with its red
curtains and cheerful fire, and all the conveniences
and prettiness she had accumulated for him there.
"I had been thinking hard, and my mind was full of
balance-sheets and figures. I entirely forgot I had
not seen you."</p>
<p>She turned round upon him, taking his arm
between her hands, and looking with a tender
smile into his face.</p>
<p>"No, my dear boy, I know better than that.
You had a reason—which shows me how well I
have divined you, and how true you are, Edward.
I have been told where—you went to last night."</p>
<p>This startled him greatly for the moment. He
looked at her with an alarmed expression: but
seeing no anger in her face, said quickly—</p>
<p>"That was all quite accidental, Aunt Catherine.
You don't think I went there on purpose, do you?"
without shrinking at all from her eyes.</p>
<p>"Yes, Edward, I thought you did. Perhaps I
was wrong. I thought there might have been some<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_106" id="Page_106">[Pg 106]</SPAN></span>
silly bargain—some promise made without thought:
and that you felt a little treacherous—that is a harsh
word—deceitful—that is worse—to me, and would
not come back and kiss me when you might be
supposed to be going against me. I forgave you
entirely, Edward, for that good thought."</p>
<p>He was a little touched in spite of himself.</p>
<p>"You are very good, Aunt Catherine—far better
to me than I deserve; but, as a matter of fact, it
was all purely accidental. I had been very busy,
and felt feverish and sleepless. I went out to have
a turn in the moonlight: chance took me that way.
There was light in Mrs. John's window. They heard
my steps, and looked out in great surprise, and asked
me to come in. I could scarcely satisfy her," he said,
with an embarrassed little laugh, "that you were not
ill, and had not sent for her to nurse you. It was as
good as a play," he went on, still laughing, followed
in every word by her anxious eyes, "to see poor Mrs.
John's struggle between politeness and sleep. She
was very sleepy, poor little woman! but dreadfully
polite. You may suppose I was surprised enough
to find myself there."</p>
<p>"Yes," she said, still holding him, still reading his
face with her anxious eyes, but feeling the ground
cut from under her feet. She was a little breathless
with anxiety and excitement. "I wonder—that you
did not tell me of it—this morning."</p>
<p>"Dear Aunt Catherine," he said, "pardon me, but
you have a little prejudice, you know, against these
people. And it was so entirely accidental. You<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_107" id="Page_107">[Pg 107]</SPAN></span>
might have thought, had I told you, that it had
been done on purpose."</p>
<p>"Did I ever doubt what you said to me, Edward?"</p>
<p>"No," he said, taking her hands in his tenderly, as
she thought; and indeed the action was not without
real tenderness, for his heart was touched. "No,"
he said, smiling, "but yet you would have had a little
doubt—a little wonder whether it was really so."</p>
<p>"And it <i>was</i> really so?" she said, looking into his
face, "really—really—no little shadow of a wish for—a
little provocation, a little talk, a little fun if you
like, Edward? Oh, no, I have no prejudice. I
should know it was quite natural. And you mean
that there was nothing at all, nothing of this—a
mere accident, nothing more?"</p>
<p>He kissed her cheek, and he laughed at her in
a filial way.</p>
<p>"Didn't I tell you, Aunt Catherine? You believe
me—oh, yes; but then you ask me if really—really
I am saying what is true? Really—really as often
as you like; it was accident, and nothing more."</p>
<p>This was how all the eloquent things which
Catherine had prepared to say were never said.
She went up to bed pleased and happy, yet not so
pleased as if he had confessed her version of the story
to be the true one. She did not doubt his word—oh
no, no—but yet—the other version looked more
true to nature. She could have understood it
better that way.</p>
<hr class="chap" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_108" id="Page_108">[Pg 108]</SPAN></span></p>
<div style="break-after:column;"></div><br />