<h2><SPAN name="Chapter_XVIII" id="Chapter_XVIII" /><i>Chapter XVIII</i></h2>
<h2>I</h2>
<p>The cocks were crowing from the yards behind the village when Maggie
opened her eyes, clear shrill music, answered from the hill as by
their echoes, and the yews outside were alive with the dawn-chirping
of the sparrows.</p>
<p>She lay there quite quietly, watching under her tired eyelids, through
the still unshuttered windows, the splendid glow, seen behind the
twisted stems in front and the slender fairy forest of birches on the
further side of the garden. Immediately outside the window lay the
path, deep in yew-needles, the ground-ivy beyond, and the wet lawn
glistening in the strange mystical light of morning.</p>
<p>She had no need to remember or consider. She knew every step and
process of the night. That was Laurie who lay opposite in a deep
sleep, his head on his arm, breathing deeply and regularly; and this
was the little smoking-room where she had seen the cigarettes laid
ready against his coming, last night.</p>
<p>There was still a log just alight on the hearth, she noticed. She got
out of her chair, softly and stiffly, for she felt intolerably languid
and tired. Besides, she must not disturb the boy. So she went down on
her knees, and, with infinite craft, picked out a coal or two from the
fender and dropped them neatly into the core of red-heat that still
smoldered. But a fragment of wood detached itself and fell with a
sharp sound; and she knew, even without turning her head, that the boy
had awakened. There was a faint inarticulate murmur, a rustle and a
long sigh.</p>
<p>Then she turned round.</p>
<p>Laurie was lying on his back, his arms clasped behind his head,
looking at her with a quiet meditative air. He appeared no more
astonished or perplexed than herself. He was a little white-looking
and tired in the light of dawn, but his eyes were bright and sure.</p>
<p>She rose from her knees again, still silent, and stood looking down on
him, and he looked back at her. There was no need of speech. It was
one of those moments in which one does not even say that there are no
words to use; one just regards the thing, like a stretch of open
country. It is contemplation, not comment, that is needed.</p>
<p>Her eyes wandered away presently, with the same tranquility, to the
brightening garden outside; and her slowly awakening mind, expanding
within, sent up a little scrap of quotation to be answered.</p>
<p>"While it was yet early ... there came to the sepulcher." How did it
run? "Mary..." Then she spoke.</p>
<p>"It is Easter Day, Laurie."</p>
<p>The boy nodded gently; and she saw his eyes slowly closing once more;
he was not yet half awake. So she went past him on tiptoe to the
window, turned the handle, and opened the white tall framework-like
door. A gush of air, sweet as wine, laden with the smell of dew and
spring flowers and wet lawns, stole in to meet her; and a blackbird,
in the shrubbery across the garden, broke into song, interrupted
himself, chattered melodiously, and scurried out to vanish in a long
curve behind the yews. The very world itself of beast and bird was
still but half awake, and from the hamlet outside the fence, beyond
the trees, rose as yet no skein of smoke and no sound of feet upon the
cobbles.</p>
<p>For the time no future presented itself to her. The minutes that
passed were enough. She regarded indeed the fact of the old man asleep
in the inn, of the old lady upstairs, but she rehearsed nothing of
what should be said to them by and by. She did not even think of the
hour, or whether she should go to bed presently for a while. She
traced no sequence of thought; she scarcely gave a glance at what was
past; it was the present only that absorbed her; and even of the
present not more than a fraction lay before her attention—the wet
lawn, the brightening east, the cool air—those with the joy that had
come with the morning were enough.</p>
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<p>Again came the long sigh behind her; and a moment afterwards there was
a step upon the floor, and Laurie himself stood by her. She glanced at
him sideways, wondering for an instant whether his mood was as hers;
and his grave, tired, boyish face was answer enough. He met her eyes,
and then again let his own stray out to the garden.</p>
<p>He was the first to speak.</p>
<p>"Maggie," he said, "I think we had best never speak of this again to
one another." She nodded, but he went on—</p>
<p>"I understand very little. I wish to understand no more. I shall ask
no questions, and nothing need be said to anybody. You agree?"</p>
<p>"I agree perfectly," she said.</p>
<p>"And not a word to my mother, of course."</p>
<p>"Of course not."</p>
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<p>The two were silent again.</p>
<p>And now reality—or rather, the faculties of memory and consideration
by which reality is apprehended—were once more coming back to the
girl and beginning to stir in her mind. She began, gently now, and
without perturbation, to recall what had passed, the long crescendo of
the previous months, the gathering mutter of the spiritual storm that
had burst last night—even the roar and flare of the storm itself, and
the mad instinctive fight for the conscious life and identity of
herself through which she had struggled. And it seemed to her as if
the storm, like others in the material plane, had washed things clean
again, and discharged an oppression of which she had been but half
conscious. Neither was it herself alone who had emerged into this
"clear shining after rain"; but the boy that stood by her seemed to
her to share in her joy. They stood here together now in a spiritual
garden, of which this lovely morning was no more than a clumsy
translation into another tongue. There stirred an air about them which
was as wine to the soul, a coolness and clearness that was beyond
thought, in a radiance that shone through all that was bathed within
it, as sunlight that filtered through water. She perceived then that
the experience had been an initiation for them both, that here they
stood, one by the other, each transparent to the other, or, at least,
he transparent to her; and she wondered, not whether he would see it
as she did, for of that she was confident, but when. For this space of
silence she perceived him through and through, and understood that
perception was everything. She saw the flaws in him as plainly as in
herself, the cracks in the crystal; yet these did not matter, for the
crystal was crystal....</p>
<p>So she waited, confident, until he should understand it too.</p>
<p>"But that is only one fraction of what is in my mind—" He broke off.</p>
<p>Then for the first time since she had opened her eyes just now her
heart began to beat. That which had lain hidden for so long—that
which she had crushed down under stone and seal and bidden lie
still—yet that which had held her resolute, all unknown to herself,
through the night that was gone—once more asserted itself and waited
for liberation.</p>
<p>"Yet how dare I—" began Laurie.</p>
<p>Again she glanced at him, terrified lest that which was in her heart
should declare itself too plainly by eyes and lips; and she saw how he
still looked across the garden, yet seeing nothing but his own thought
written there against the glory of sky and leaf and grass. His face
caught the splendor from the east, and she saw in it the lines that
would tell always of the anguish through which he was come; and again
the terror in her heart leapt to the other side, in spite of her
confidence, and bade her fear lest through some mistake, some
conventional shame, he should say no more.</p>
<p>Then he turned his troubled eyes and looked her in the face, and as he
looked the trouble cleared.</p>
<p>"Why—Maggie!" he said.</p>
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