Rhymes of a Red Cross Man

<p><SPAN name="link2H_4_0043" id="link2H_4_0043"></SPAN></p> <br/> <h2> The Coward </h2> <p>'Ave you seen Bill's mug in the Noos to-day?<br/> 'E's gyned the Victoriar Cross, they say;<br/> Little Bill wot would grizzle and run away,<br/> If you 'it 'im a swipe on the jawr.<br/> 'E's slaughtered the Kaiser's men in tons;<br/> 'E's captured one of their quick-fire guns,<br/> And 'e 'adn't no practice in killin' 'Uns<br/> Afore 'e went off to the war.<br/> <br/> Little Bill wot I nussed in 'is by-by clothes;<br/> Little Bill wot told me 'is childish woes;<br/> 'Ow often I've tidied 'is pore little nose<br/> Wiv the 'em of me pinnyfore.<br/> And now all the papers 'is praises ring,<br/> And 'e's been and 'e's shaken the 'and of the King<br/> And I sawr 'im to-day in the ward, pore thing,<br/> Where they're patchin' 'im up once more.<br/> <br/> And 'e says: "Wot d'ye think of it, Lizer Ann?"<br/> And I says: "Well, I can't make it out, old man;<br/> You'd 'ook it as soon as a scrap began,<br/> When you was a bit of a kid."<br/> And 'e whispers: "'Ere, on the quiet, Liz,<br/> They're makin' too much of the 'ole damn biz,<br/> And the papers is printin' me ugly phiz,<br/> But . . . I'm 'anged if I know wot I did.<br/> <br/> "Oh, the Captain comes and 'e says: 'Look 'ere!<br/> They're far too quiet out there: it's queer.<br/> They're up to somethin'&mdash;'oo'll volunteer<br/> To crawl in the dark and see?'<br/> Then I felt me 'eart like a 'ammer go,<br/> And up jumps a chap and 'e says: 'Right O!'<br/> But I chips in straight, and I says 'Oh no!<br/> 'E's a missis and kids&mdash;take me.'<br/> <br/> "And the next I knew I was sneakin' out,<br/> And the oozy corpses was all about,<br/> And I felt so scared I wanted to shout,<br/> And me skin fair prickled wiv fear;<br/> And I sez: 'You coward! You 'ad no right<br/> To take on the job of a man this night,'<br/> Yet still I kept creepin' till ('orrid sight!)<br/> The trench of the 'Uns was near.<br/> <br/> "It was all so dark, it was all so still;<br/> Yet somethin' pushed me against me will;<br/> 'Ow I wanted to turn! Yet I crawled until<br/> I was seein' a dim light shine.<br/> Then thinks I: 'I'll just go a little bit,<br/> And see wot the doose I can make of it,'<br/> And it seemed to come from the mouth of a pit:<br/> 'Christmas!' sez I, 'a <i>MINE.'</i><br/> <br/> "Then 'ere's the part wot I can't explain:<br/> I wanted to make for 'ome again,<br/> But somethin' was blazin' inside me brain,<br/> So I crawled to the trench instead;<br/> Then I saw the bullet 'ead of a 'Un,<br/> And 'e stood by a rapid-firer gun,<br/> And I lifted a rock and I 'it 'im one,<br/> And 'e dropped like a chunk o' lead.<br/> <br/> "Then all the 'Uns that was underground,<br/> Comes up with a rush and on with a bound,<br/> And I swings that giddy old Maxim round<br/> And belts 'em solid and square.<br/> You see I was off me chump wiv fear:<br/> 'If I'm sellin' me life,' sez I, 'it's dear.'<br/> And the trench was narrow and they was near,<br/> So I peppered the brutes for fair.<br/> <br/> "So I 'eld 'em back and I yelled wiv fright,<br/> And the boys attacked and we 'ad a fight,<br/> And we 'captured a section o' trench' that night<br/> Which we didn't expect to get;<br/> And they found me there with me Maxim gun,<br/> And I'd laid out a score if I'd laid out one,<br/> And I fainted away when the thing was done,<br/> And I 'aven't got over it yet."<br/> <br/> So that's the 'istory Bill told me.<br/> Of course it's all on the strict Q. T.;<br/> It wouldn't do to get out, you see,<br/> As 'e hacted against 'is will.<br/> But 'e's convalescin' wiv all 'is might,<br/> And 'e 'opes to be fit for another fight&mdash;<br/> Say! Ain't 'e a bit of the real all right?<br/> Wot's the matter with Bill!<br/></p> <div style="break-after:column;"></div><br />