<SPAN name="chap29"></SPAN>
<h3> CHAPTER XXIX </h3>
<p>"When you receive this letter, you will have already seen the result. I
knew how it would be, but tried to hope because you were hoping. My
poll is better than that of the last Liberal candidate, but Hollingford
remains a Tory stronghold. Shall I come to see you? I am worn out,
utterly exhausted, and can scarcely hold the pen. Perhaps a few days at
the sea-side would do me good, but what right have I to idle? If you
would like me to come, please wire to Alverholme Rectory. Possibly you
would rather I didn't bring my gloom, now you have Len with you and are
enjoying yourself. Above all, be quite frank. If you are too
disappointed to care to see me, in heaven's name, say so! You needn't
fear its effect upon me. I should be glad to have done with the world,
but I have duties to discharge. I wish you could have heard my last
speech, there were good things in it. You shall see my address of
thanks to those who voted for me; I must try to get it widely
circulated, for, as you know, it has more than local importance.
Breakspeare, good fellow, says that I have a great career before me; I
grin, and can't tell him the squalid truth. There are many things I
should like to speak about; my brain is feverishly active. I must try
to rest; another twenty-four hours of this strain, and the results
would be serious. In any case, wire to me—yes or no. If it is <i>no</i>, I
shall say 'so be it,' and begin at once to look out for some way of
earning bread and cheese. We shall be friends all the same."</p>
<p>Mrs. Woolstan was at Eastbourne. Having read Lashmar's letter, she
brooded for a few minutes, then betook herself to the post-office, and
telegraphed "Come at once." A few hours later she received a telegram
informing her that Lashmar would reach Eastbourne at eleven o'clock on
the next morning. At that hour, she waited in her lodgings on the
sea-front. A cab drove up; Lashmar was shown into the room.</p>
<p>He looked, indeed, much the worse for his agitations. His hand was hot;
he moved languidly, and seemed to be too tired to utter more than a few
words.</p>
<p>"Are you alone?"</p>
<p>"Quite. Len is down on the shore, and won't be back till half-past one."</p>
<p>"Would you—mind—if I lay down—on the sofa?"</p>
<p>"Of course not," replied Iris, regarding him anxiously. "You're not
ill, I hope?"</p>
<p>He took her hand, and pressed it against his forehead, with the most
melancholy of smiles. Having dropped onto the couch, he beckoned Iris
to take a chair beside him.</p>
<p>"What can I get for you?" she asked. "You must have some refreshment—"</p>
<p>"Sleep, sleep!" he moaned musically. "If I could but sleep a
little!—But I have so much to say. Don't fuss; you know how I hate
fuss. No, no, I don't want anything, I assure you. But I haven't slept
for a week Give me your hand. How glad I am to see you again! So you
still have faith in me? You don't despise me?"</p>
<p>"What nonsense!" said Iris, allowing him to hold her hand against his
breast as he lay motionless, his eyes turned to the ceiling. "You must
try again, that's all. At Hollingford, it was evidently hopeless."</p>
<p>"Yes. I made a mistake. If I could have stood as a Conservative, I
should have carried all before me. It was Lady Ogram's quarrel with
Robb which committed me to the other side."</p>
<p>Iris was silent, panting a little as if she suppressed words which had
risen to her lips. He turned his head to look at her.</p>
<p>"Of course you understand that party names haven't the least meaning
for me. By necessity, I wear a ticket, but it's a matter of total
indifference to me what name it bears. My object has nothing to do with
party politics. But for Lady Ogram's squabbles, I should at this moment
be Member for Hollingford."</p>
<p>"But would it be possible?" asked Iris, with a flutter, "to call
yourself a Conservative next time?"</p>
<p>"I have been thinking about that." He spoke absently, his eyes still
upwards. "It is pretty certain that the Conservative side gives me more
chance. It enrages me to think how I should have triumphed at
Hollingford! I could have roused the place to such enthusiasm as it
never knew! The great mistake of my life—but what choice had I? Lady
Ogram was fatal to me."</p>
<p>He groaned, and let his eyelids droop.</p>
<p>"It is possible that, at the general election, a Liberal constituency
may invite me. In that case, of course—" He broke off with a weary
wave of the hand. "But what's the use of thinking about it? I must look
for work. Do you know, I have thoughts of going to New Zealand."</p>
<p>"Oh! That's nonsense!"</p>
<p>"Try to realise my position." He raised himself on his elbow. "After my
life of the last few months, will it be very enjoyable to become a
subordinate, to work for wages, to sink into obscurity? Does it seem to
you natural? Do you think I shall be able to bear it?"</p>
<p>He had begun to quiver with excitement. As Iris kept silence, he rose
to a sitting position, and continued more vehemently.</p>
<p>"Don't you understand that death would be preferable, a thousand times?
Imagine me—<i>me</i> at the beck and call of paltry every-day people! Does
it seem to you fitting that I should pay by such degradation for one or
two trivial errors? How I shall bear it, I don't know; but bear it I
must. I keep reminding myself that I am not a free man. If once I could
pay my debt—"</p>
<p>"Oh, <i>don't</i> talk about that!" exclaimed Iris, on a note of distress.
"What do I care about the money?"</p>
<p>"No, but <i>I</i> care about my honour!" cried Lashmar. "If I had won the
election, all would have been different; my career would have begun. Do
you know what I should have done in that case? I should have come to
you, and have said: 'I am a Member of Parliament. It is to you that I
owe this, more than to anyone else. Will you do yet more for me? Will
you be my companion in the life upon which I am entering—share all my
hopes—help me to conquer?'—<i>That</i> is what I meant to do. But I am
beaten, and I can only ask you to have patience with your miserable
debtor."</p>
<p>He let his face fall onto the head of the sofa, and shook with emotion.
There was a short silence, then Iris, her cheeks flushing, lightly
touched his hair. At once he looked up, gazed into her face.</p>
<p>"What! You still believe in me? Enough for <i>that</i>?"</p>
<p>"Yes," replied Iris, her eyes down, and her bosom fluttering. "Enough
for that."</p>
<p>"Ah! But be careful—think!" He looked at her with impressive sadness.
"Your friends will tell you that you are marrying a penniless
adventurer. Have you the courage to face all that kind of thing?"</p>
<p>"I know you better than my friends do," replied Iris, taking in both
her own the hand he held to her. "My fear," she added, again dropping
her eyes and fluttering, "is that you will some day repent."</p>
<p>"Never! Never! It would be the blackest ingratitude!"</p>
<p>He spoke so fervently that the freckled face became rosy with joy. It
was so near to his, that the man in him claimed warmer tribute, and
Iris grew rosier still.</p>
<p>"Haven't you always loved me a little?" she whispered.</p>
<p>"If I had only known it!" answered Lashmar, the victor's smile softened
with self-reproach. "My ambition has much to answer for. Forgive me,
Iris."</p>
<p>"There's something else I must say, dear," she murmured. "After all, I
have so little—and there is Len, you know—"</p>
<p>"Why, of course. Do you imagine I should wish to rob him?"</p>
<p>"No, no, no!" she panted. "But it is such a small income, after all.
I'm afraid we ought to—to be careful, at first—"</p>
<p>"Of course we must. We shall live as simply as possible. And then, you
mustn't suppose that I shall never earn money. It's only waiting for
one's opportunity."</p>
<p>A silence fell between them. Lashmar's amorous countenance had an
under-note of thoughtfulness; Iris, smiling blissfully, none the less
reflected.</p>
<p>"What are you thinking of?" he asked, gently.</p>
<p>"Only how happy I am. I haven't the slightest fear. I know you have
great things before you. Of course we must make use of our friends. May
I write to Mrs. Toplady, and tell her?"</p>
<p>She spoke without looking at him, and so was spared the interpretation
of muscular twitches.</p>
<p>"Certainly. Do you know whether she is still in London?"</p>
<p>"I don't know, but probably not. Don't you think she may be very useful
to us? I have always found her very nice and kind, and she knows such
hosts of people."</p>
<p>Lashmar had his own thoughts about Mrs. Toplady, but the advantage of
her friendship was undeniable. Happily, he had put it out of her power
to injure him by any revelations she might make concerning May Tomalin;
his avowal to Iris that May had been undisguisedly in love with him
would suffice to explain anything she might hear about the tragi-comedy
at Rivenoak. Whether the lady of Pont Street could be depended upon for
genuine good will, was a question that must remain unsettled until he
had seen her again. She had bidden him to call upon her, at all events,
and plainly it would be advisable to do so as soon as possible.</p>
<p>"Yes," he answered, reflectively. "She is a person to be reckoned with.
It's possible her advice might be worth something in the difficulty
about Liberal or Conservative. She is intelligent enough, I think, to
understand me on that point. Yes, you might write to her at once. If I
were you, I would speak quite frankly. You know her well enough for
that, don't you?"</p>
<p>"Frankly? How?"</p>
<p>"Oh, I mean that you might say we have really been fond of each other
for a long time—and that—well, that fate has brought us together in
spite of everything that kind of thing, you know."</p>
<p>"Yes, yes!" exclaimed Iris. "That's just what I should like to say."</p>
<p>Their talk grew calmly practical; the last half hour of it was
concerned with pecuniary detail. Her eye on the clock—for Leonard was
sure to enter very soon—Mrs. Woolstan gave a full account of her
income, enumerating the securities which were in the hands of her
trustee, Mr. Wrybolt, and those which she had under her own control. In
the event of her re-marriage, Mr. Wrybolt's responsibility came to an
end, a circumstance very pleasing to Lashmar. When the schoolboy
interrupted them, their conversation was by no means finished. After a
cheerful lunch, they resumed it on the sea-shore, Leonard being sent
off to amuse himself as he would. By tea-time, it had been agreed that
Lashmar should at once give up his expensive London rooms, and come
down to Eastbourne, to recruit his health and enjoy Iris's society,
until Leonard went back to school. The house at West Hampstead should
be their home for the first twelvemonth; by that time they would see
how things were going, and be able to make plans. Early in the evening,
Lashmar took a train for town.</p>
<p>At his lodgings he found several letters; two of them were important.
Constance Bride's handwriting indicated the envelope to be first torn
open. She wrote concisely and with her usual clearness. The ill news
from Hollingford had been a grief to her, but it was very satisfactory
to see that Lashmar had reduced the Conservative majority. "You have
gained some very useful experience, which I hope you may before long
have an opportunity of using. Please send me a statement of the
election expenses as soon as you can; you remember the understanding
between us in that matter. I am soon leaving England for a few weeks,
but a letter directed as above will always reach me." The address
referred to was that of a well-known Society for Social Reform in the
west of London.</p>
<p>His hand tremulous with the anger which this curt epistle had excited,
Lashmar broke an envelope on the flap of which was printed in red
letters the Pont Street address so familiar to him. Mrs. Toplady wrote
more at length; she took the trouble to express her disappointment at
the result of the Hollingford election in courteously rounded
terms—"Our dear old friend of Rivenoak would have found some apt
phrase to describe such a man as Butterworth. Wasn't she good at that
kind of thing! How I have laughed to hear her talk of the late lamented
Robb! You have the satisfaction of knowing that you got more votes than
any Liberal has done at Hollingford for many years—so the papers tell
me. In fact, you have made a very good start indeed, and I am sure the
eye of the party will be on you."</p>
<p>Lashmar glowed. He had not expected such words from Mrs. Toplady. After
all, Iris had given him good advice. Who knew but this woman might be
more useful to him than Lady Ogram had been?</p>
<p>"Do you care for news of Miss Tomalin?" the latter continued. "After
spending two or three days with me, she grew restless, and took rooms
for herself. I am afraid, to tell you the truth, that she is a little
disappointing; it is perhaps quite as well that a certain romantic
affair which was confided to me came to nothing. A week after she left
my house, I received a very stiff (not to say impertinent) letter, in
which the young lady informed me that she was about to marry a Mr.
Yabsley of Northampton, a man (to quote her words) 'of the highest
powers and with a brilliant future already assured to him.' This seemed
to me, I confess, a little sudden, but at least it had the merit of
being amusing. Perhaps I may venture to hope that you are already quite
consoled? Remember me, I beg, to Miss Bride. Are you likely to be in
this part of the world during the holidays? If anywhere near, do come
and see me, and we will talk about that striking philosophical theory
of yours."</p>
<p>Lashmar bit his lip. All at once he saw Mrs. Toplady's smile, and it
troubled him. None the less did he ponder her letter, re-reading it
several times. Presently he mused with uneasiness on the fact that Iris
might even now be writing to Mrs. Toplady. Would her interest in
him—she seemed indeed to be genuinely interested—survive the
announcement that, after all, he was not going to marry Constance
Bride, but had declined upon an insignificant little widow with a few
hundreds a year? Was not this upshot of his adventures too beggarly?
Had Mrs. Toplady been within easy reach, he would have gone to see her;
but she wrote from the north of Scotland. He could only await the
result of Iris's letter.</p>
<p>To the news concerning May Tomalin, he gave scarcely a thought. Mr.
Yabsley, of Northampton!</p>
<p>Exceeding weariness sank him for a few hours in sleep; but before dawn
he was tossing again on the waves of miserable doubt. Why had he not
waited a little before going to see Iris? If only he had received this
letter of Mrs. Toplady in time, it would have checked him—or so he
thought. Was it the malice of fate which had ordained that, on his way
to Eastbourne, he should not have troubled to look in at his lodgings?
How many such wretched accidents he could recall! Was he, instead of
being fortune's favourite, simply a poor devil hunted by ill luck,
doomed to lose every chance? Why not he as well as another? Such men
abound.</p>
<p>He had not yet taken the irretrievable step. Until he was actually
married, a hope remained to him. He might postpone the fatal day; his
purse was not yet empty. Why should he be too strict in the report of
his election expenses to Constance? Every pound in his pocket meant a
prolongation of liberty, a new horizon of the possible—</p>
<p>Two days later he was back again at Eastbourne. He had taken a cheap
little lodging, and yielded himself to sea-side indolence. A week
passed, then Iris heard from Mrs. Toplady. She did not at once show
Lashmar the letter; she awaited a moment when he was lulled by physical
comfort into a facile and sanguine humour.</p>
<p>"Mrs. Toplady must have been in a hurry when she wrote this," was her
remark, as, with seeming carelessness, she produced the letter. "Of
course she has an enormous correspondence. I shall hear again from her,
no doubt, before long."</p>
<p>One side only of the note-paper was covered. In formal phrase, the
writer said that she was glad to hear of her friend's engagement, and
wished her all happiness. Not a word about their future meeting; not an
allusion to Lashmar's prospects. If Iris had announced her coming
marriage with some poor clerk, Mrs. Toplady could not have written
less effusively.</p>
<p>"There's an end of her interest in <i>me</i>," Dyce remarked, with a nervous
shrug.</p>
<p>Iris protested, and did her best to put another aspect on the matter,
but without success. For twenty-four hours, Lashmar kept away from her;
she, offended, tried to disregard his absence, but at length sped to
make inquiries, fearful lest he should be driven to despair. At the
murky end of a wet evening, they paced the esplanade together.</p>
<p>"You don't love me," said Iris, on a sob.</p>
<p>"It is because I love you," he replied, glooming, "that I can't bear to
think of you married to such a luckless fellow as I am."</p>
<p>"Dearest!" she whispered. "Am I ruining you? Do you wish to be free
again? Tell me the truth; I think I can bear it."</p>
<p>The next day saw them rambling in sunshine, Lashmar amorous and
resigned, Iris flutteringly hopeful. And with such alternations did the
holiday go by. When Leonard returned to school, their marriage was
fixed for ten days later.</p>
<p>Shortly before leaving Eastbourne, Iris had written to Mr. Wrybolt.
Already they had corresponded on the subject of her marriage; this last
letter, concerning a point of business which required immediate
attention, remained without reply. Puzzled by her trustee's silence,
Iris, soon after she reached home, went to see him at his City Office.
She learnt that Mr. Wrybolt was out of town, but would certainly return
in a day or two.</p>
<p>Again she wrote. Again she waited in vain for a reply. On a dull
afternoon near the end of September, as she sat thinking of Lashmar and
resolutely seeing him in the glorified aspect dear to her heart and
mind, the servant announced Mr. Barker. This was the athletic young man
in whose company she had spent some time at Gorleston before Lashmar's
coming. His business lay in the City; he knew Mr. Wrybolt, and through
him had made Mrs. Woolstan's acquaintance. The face with which he
entered the drawing-room portended something more than a friendly chat.
Iris had at one time thought that this young man felt disposed to offer
her marriage; was that his purpose now, and did it account for his odd
look?</p>
<p>"I want to ask you," Mr. Barker began, abruptly, "whether you know
anything about Wrybolt? Have you heard from him lately?"</p>
<p>Iris replied that she herself wished to hear of that gentleman, who did
not answer her letters, and was said to be out of town.</p>
<p>"That's so, is it?" exclaimed the young man, with a yet stranger look
on his face. "You really have no idea where he is?"</p>
<p>"None whatever. And I particularly want to see him."</p>
<p>"So do I," said Mr. Barker, smiling grimly. "So do several people.
You'll excuse me, I hope, Mrs. Woolstan. I knew he was a friend of
yours, and thought you might perhaps know more about him than we did in
the City. I mustn't stay."</p>
<p>Iris stared at him as he rose. A vague alarm began to tremble in her
mind.</p>
<p>"You don't mean that anything's wrong?" she panted.</p>
<p>"We'll hope not, but it looks queer."</p>
<p>"Oh!" cried Iris. "He has money of mine. He is my trustee."</p>
<p>"I know that. Please excuse me; I really mustn't stay."</p>
<p>"Oh, but tell me, Mr. Barker!" She clutched at his coat sleeve. "Is my
money in danger?"</p>
<p>"I can't say, but you certainly ought to look after it. Get someone to
make inquiries at once; that's my advice. I really must go."</p>
<p>He disappeared, leaving Iris motionless in amazement and terror.</p>
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