<SPAN name="startofbook"></SPAN>
<h2>THE BOOK OF THIS AND THAT</h2>
<hr style="width: 65%;" />
<h1>THE BOOK<br/> OF THIS AND THAT</h1>
<h3>BY</h3>
<h2>ROBERT LYND</h2>
<h5>MILLS & BOON, LIMITED<br/>
49 RUPERT STREET<br/>
LONDON, W.</h5>
<hr style="width: 65%;" />
<h4><i>Published 1915</i></h4>
<hr style="width: 65%;" />
<h4>IN MEMORIAM<br/>
WILLIAM BARKLEY<br/>
</h4>
<hr style="width: 65%;" />
<h2>CONTENTS</h2>
<table border="0" cellpadding="5" cellspacing="0" summary="Table of Contents" width="90%">
<tr>
<td> </td>
<td> </td>
<td align="right"><small>PAGE</small></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#I"><b>I.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">Suspicion</span></td>
<td align="right">1</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#II"><b>II.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">On Good Resolutions</span></td>
<td align="right"> 9</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#III"><b>III.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">The Sin of Dancing</span></td>
<td align="right"> 17</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#IV"><b>IV.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">Thoughts at a Tango Tea</span></td>
<td align="right"> 25</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#V"><b>V.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">The Humours of Murder</span></td>
<td align="right"> 34</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#VI"><b>VI.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">The Decline and Fall of Hell</span></td>
<td align="right"> 43</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#VII"><b>VII.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">On Cheerful Readers</span></td>
<td align="right"> 51</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#VIII"><b>VIII.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">St G. B. S. and the Bishop</span></td>
<td align="right"> 59</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#IX"><b>IX.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">Stupidity</span></td>
<td align="right"> 68</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#X"><b>X.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">Waste</span></td>
<td align="right"> 77</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XI"><b>XI.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">On Christmas</span></td>
<td align="right"> 85</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XII"><b>XII.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">On Demagogues</span></td>
<td align="right"> 94</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XIII"><b>XIII.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">On Coincidences</span></td>
<td align="right"> 102</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XIV"><b>XIV.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">On Indignation</span></td>
<td align="right"> 111</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XV"><b>XV.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">The Heart of Mr Galsworthy</span></td>
<td align="right"> 120</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XVI"><b>XVI.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">Spring Fashions</span></td>
<td align="right"> 129</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XVII"><b>XVII.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">On Black Cats</span></td>
<td align="right"> 137</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XVIII"><b>XVIII.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">On Being Shocked</span></td>
<td align="right"> 145</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XIX"><b>XIX.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">Confessions</span></td>
<td align="right"> 154</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XX"><b>XX.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">The Terrors of Politics</span></td>
<td align="right"> 162</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XXI"><b>XXI.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">On Disasters</span></td>
<td align="right"> 170</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XXII"><b>XXII.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">The Rights of Murder</span></td>
<td align="right"> 180</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XXIII"><b>XXIII.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">The Humour of Hoaxes</span></td>
<td align="right"> 188</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XXIV"><b>XXIV.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">Anatole France</span></td>
<td align="right"> 197</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XXV"><b>XXV.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">The Sea</span></td>
<td align="right"> 205</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XXVI"><b>XXVI.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">The Futurists</span></td>
<td align="right"> 215</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XXVII"><b>XXVII.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">A Defence of Critics</span></td>
<td align="right"> 224</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td align="right"><SPAN href="#XXVIII"><b>XXVIII.</b></SPAN></td>
<td><span class="smcap">On the Beauty of Statistics</span></td>
<td align="right"> 232</td>
</tr>
</table>
<hr style="width: 45%;" />
<div class="blockquot">
<p><i>These essays have appeared from week to week in</i> The New Statesman, <i>to
the Editor and Proprietors of which I make grateful acknowledgment.</i></p>
<p style='text-align:right'>R. L.</p>
</div>
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<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_1" id="Page_1">[Pg 1]</SPAN></span></p>
<h1>THE<br/> BOOK OF THIS AND THAT</h1>
<hr style="width: 65%;" />
<h2><SPAN name="I" id="I"></SPAN>I</h2>
<h3>SUSPICION</h3>
<p>Suspicion is a beast with a thousand eyes, but
most of them are blind, or colour-blind, or askew,
or rolling, or yellow. It is a beast with a thousand
ears, but most of them are like the ears of the deaf
man in the comic recitation who, when you say
"whiskers" hears "solicitors," and when you are
talking about the weather thinks you are threatening
to murder him. It is a beast with a thousand
tongues, and they are all slanderous. On the
whole, it is the most loathsome monster outside
the pages of <i>The Faërie Queene</i>. Just as the ugliest
ape that ever was born is all the more repellent
for being so like a man, so suspicion is all the more
hideous because it is so close a caricature of the
passion for truth. It is a leering perversion of
that passion which sent Columbus looking for a
lost continent and urged Galileo to turn his telescope
<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_2" id="Page_2">[Pg 2]</SPAN></span>on the heavens. Columbus may, in a sense,
be said to have suspected that America was there,
and Galileo suspected more than was good for his
comfort about the conduct of the stars. But these
were noble suspicions—leaps into the light. They
are no more comparable to the suspicions which
are becoming a feature of public life than the
energies of an explorer of the South Pole are comparable
to the energies of one of those private
detectives who are paid to grub after evidence in
divorce cases. One might put it a good deal more
strongly, indeed, for the private detective may in
his own way be an officer of truth and humanity,
while the suspicious politician is the prophet only
of party disreputableness. He is like the average
suspicious husband, in the case of whom, even
when his suspicions are true, one is inclined to
sympathise with the wife for being married to so
green-eyed a fool. Suspicion, take it all in all, is
the most tedious and scrannel of the sins.</p>
<p>It would be folly, of course, to suggest that there
is no such thing as justifiable suspicion. If you
see a man in a Tube lift with his hand on some old
gentleman's watch-chain, you are justified in suspecting
that his object is something less innocent
than to persuade the old gentleman to become a
Plymouth Brother. But the man of suspicious<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_3" id="Page_3">[Pg 3]</SPAN></span>
temperament is not content with cases of this sort.
He is the sort of man who, if it were not for the law
of libel, would suspect the Rev. F. B. Meyer of
having stolen La Gioconda from the Louvre.</p>
<p>His suspicions are like those of a man who
would accost you in the street with the assertion
that you had just murdered the President of the
United States or that you were hiding a stolen
Dreadnought in your pocket. Obviously there
would be no reply to a man like this, except that
he was mad. He has got an idea into his head,
and it is his idea, and not the proof or disproof that
the idea has any justification, which seems to him
to be the most important thing in the world.
Suspicion, indeed, is a well-known form of mania.
Husbands suspect their wives of trying to poison
their beer; friends suspect friends of planning the
most extraordinary series of losses and humiliations
for them. Nothing can happen but the suspicious
man believes that somebody did it on purpose.
He is like the savage who cannot believe that his
great-grandmother died without somebody having
plotted it. Obviously, to believe things like
this is to put poison in the air, and it is not
surprising to learn that the savage goes out and
murders the first man he meets for being his
great-grandmother's murderer. In this matter<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_4" id="Page_4">[Pg 4]</SPAN></span>
civilised man is little better than the savage. He
knows a little more about natural laws, and so he
is not suspicious of quite the same things; but his
suspicions, as soon as he begins to harbour them,
swiftly strip off his civilisation as a drunken man
strips off his coat in order to fight in the street.
He becomes Othello while the clock is striking.
Straightway, all the world's his bolster; there is
no creature on earth so innocent or so beautiful
that he will not smother it in the insanity of his
passion. Literature is to a great extent an indictment
of suspicion. <i>The Ring and the Book</i> is an
epic of suspicion, and the <i>Blot on the 'Scutcheon</i> is
its tragedy. In the story of Paolo and Francesca,
again, we are made feel that the hideous thing was
not the love of Paolo and Francesca, but the
murderous suspicion of Malatesta. In this case
it may be admitted, there was justice in the suspicion;
but suspicion is so very loathsome a thing
that, even when it is just, we like it as little as we
like spying. All we can say in its favour is that
it is more pitiable. Men do not go spying because
there is a fury in their bosoms, but the suspicious
man is one who is being eaten alive at the heart.
He wears the mark of doom on his sullen brows
as surely as Cain. For such a man the sun does
not shine and the stars are silver conspirators. He<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_5" id="Page_5">[Pg 5]</SPAN></span>
is a person who can suspect whole landscapes; he
sees a countryside, not as an exciting pattern of
meadow and river-bend and hills and smoke
among trees, but as an arrangement of a thousand
farms with fierce dogs eager for the calves of his
legs. He can concentrate his affections on nothing
beautiful. He can see only worms in buds. He
can ultimately follow nothing with enthusiasm
but will-o'-the-wisps. To go after these he will
leave wife and children and lands, and he will
dance into the perils of the marshes, into sure
drowning—a lost figure of derision or pity, according
to your gentleness.</p>
<p>Nor is it only in private life that suspicion is a
light that leads men into bog-holes. Suspicion in
public life is also a disaster among passions.
Englishmen who realise this must have noticed
with apprehension the growth of suspicion as a
principle in recent years.</p>
<p>Suspicion is the arch-calumniator. That is
why, of all weapons, it is most avoided by decent
fighters. Every honourable man would rather be
calumniated than a calumniator—every sensible
man, too, for calumny is the worst policy. It is
clear that while the public men of a country are
prepared to believe each other capable of anything
there can be no more national unity than in present<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_6" id="Page_6">[Pg 6]</SPAN></span>-day
Mexico or than in Poland before the partition.
It is the same with parties as with nations. The
reason why revolutionary parties are so rarely
successful is that the members suspect not only
everybody else but each other. The more revolutionary
the party is, the more the members are
inclined to regard each other, not as potential
Garibaldis, but potential traitors. For much the
same reasons criminal conspiracies seldom prosper.
Crime seems to create an atmosphere of suspicion,
and co-operation among men who doubt each other
is impossible. But it is the same with every conspiracy,
whether it is criminal or not. Secrecy
seems to awaken all the nerves of suspicion, even
when one is secret for the public good, and the
conspirators soon find themselves believing the
most ludicrous things. Who has not known committees
on which some man or woman will not sit
because of an idea that some other member is in
the pay of Scotland Yard? The amusing part
of the business is that this kind of thing goes on
even in committees about the proceedings of
which there is no need of secrecy at all and at which
reporters from the <i>Times</i> might be present for all
the harm to man or beast that is discussed. But
there is a tradition of suspicion in some movements
that serves the purpose of enabling many innocent<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_7" id="Page_7">[Pg 7]</SPAN></span>
people to lead exciting lives. I once knew a man
who spent half his time tying up his bootlaces
under lamp-posts. He had an invincible belief
that detectives followed him, and he was never
content till he had allowed whoever was behind
him to get past. Scotland Yard, I am confident,
knew as little of him as it does of Wordsworth.
But it was his folly to think otherwise, and for all
I know he may be going on with those slow but
sensational walks of his through the London
streets at the present day. This is the amusing
side of suspicion. Unfortunately, it has also its
base and mirthless side. Practically, every bloody
mistake—I use the word not as an oath—in the
French Revolution was the result of suspicion. It
began with suspicion of the Girondins; but
suspicion of Danton and Robespierre soon followed.
Suspicion is a monster that devours her own
children. Manifestly, no movement can succeed
in which men believe that their friends are viler
than their enemies. But in every movement,
there are men who make a trade of suspecting the
leaders in their own camp, and the Socialist movement
is as much exposed to the plague as any
other. Suspicion of this kind, I think, is a bitter
form of egoism. It is a trampling of the suspected
persons under one's own white feet.<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_8" id="Page_8">[Pg 8]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>Nor is it only in movements and in nations that
suspicion plays havoc. International suspicion is
a no less costly visitor. We live in a world in
which every cup of tea we drink and every pipe of
tobacco we smoke pays toll to this ancient and
gluttonous dragon. Every year each country
sets up huge altars of men and ships and guns to
the beast, but he is not satisfied. He demands
universal power, and insists that we shall give all
our goods to him except just enough to keep ourselves
alive and that we shall not shrink even from
offering up human sacrifices at a nod of his head.
Perhaps some day a new St George will arise and
release us from so shameful a subjection. Common
sense seems to have as little force against him as
an ordinary foot-soldier against Goliath. We feel
the need of some miraculous personage to put an
end to our distress. Meanwhile, one may hail as
prophetic the continual organisation of new knighthoods
for the Suppression of the Dragon.</p>
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<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_9" id="Page_9">[Pg 9]</SPAN></span></p>
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