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<h2> Chapter XLIV </h2>
<h3> Arthur's Return </h3>
<p>When Arthur Donnithorne landed at Liverpool and read the letter from his
Aunt Lydia, briefly announcing his grand-father's death, his first feeling
was, "Poor Grandfather! I wish I could have got to him to be with him when
he died. He might have felt or wished something at the last that I shall
never know now. It was a lonely death."</p>
<p>It is impossible to say that his grief was deeper than that. Pity and
softened memory took place of the old antagonism, and in his busy thoughts
about the future, as the chaise carried him rapidly along towards the home
where he was now to be master, there was a continually recurring effort to
remember anything by which he could show a regard for his grandfather's
wishes, without counteracting his own cherished aims for the good of the
tenants and the estate. But it is not in human nature—only in human
pretence—for a young man like Arthur, with a fine constitution and
fine spirits, thinking well of himself, believing that others think well
of him, and having a very ardent intention to give them more and more
reason for that good opinion—it is not possible for such a young
man, just coming into a splendid estate through the death of a very old
man whom he was not fond of, to feel anything very different from exultant
joy. Now his real life was beginning; now he would have room and
opportunity for action, and he would use them. He would show the Loamshire
people what a fine country gentleman was; he would not exchange that
career for any other under the sun. He felt himself riding over the hills
in the breezy autumn days, looking after favourite plans of drainage and
enclosure; then admired on sombre mornings as the best rider on the best
horse in the hunt; spoken well of on market-days as a first-rate landlord;
by and by making speeches at election dinners, and showing a wonderful
knowledge of agriculture; the patron of new ploughs and drills, the severe
upbraider of negligent landowners, and withal a jolly fellow that
everybody must like—happy faces greeting him everywhere on his own
estate, and the neighbouring families on the best terms with him. The
Irwines should dine with him every week, and have their own carriage to
come in, for in some very delicate way that Arthur would devise, the
lay-impropriator of the Hayslope tithes would insist on paying a couple of
hundreds more to the vicar; and his aunt should be as comfortable as
possible, and go on living at the Chase, if she liked, in spite of her
old-maidish ways—at least until he was married, and that event lay
in the indistinct background, for Arthur had not yet seen the woman who
would play the lady-wife to the first-rate country gentleman.</p>
<p>These were Arthur's chief thoughts, so far as a man's thoughts through
hours of travelling can be compressed into a few sentences, which are only
like the list of names telling you what are the scenes in a long long
panorama full of colour, of detail, and of life. The happy faces Arthur
saw greeting him were not pale abstractions, but real ruddy faces, long
familiar to him: Martin Poyser was there—the whole Poyser family.</p>
<p>What—Hetty?</p>
<p>Yes; for Arthur was at ease about Hetty—not quite at ease about the
past, for a certain burning of the ears would come whenever he thought of
the scenes with Adam last August, but at ease about her present lot. Mr.
Irwine, who had been a regular correspondent, telling him all the news
about the old places and people, had sent him word nearly three months ago
that Adam Bede was not to marry Mary Burge, as he had thought, but pretty
Hetty Sorrel. Martin Poyser and Adam himself had both told Mr. Irwine all
about it—that Adam had been deeply in love with Hetty these two
years, and that now it was agreed they were to be married in March. That
stalwart rogue Adam was more susceptible than the rector had thought; it
was really quite an idyllic love affair; and if it had not been too long
to tell in a letter, he would have liked to describe to Arthur the
blushing looks and the simple strong words with which the fine honest
fellow told his secret. He knew Arthur would like to hear that Adam had
this sort of happiness in prospect.</p>
<p>Yes, indeed! Arthur felt there was not air enough in the room to satisfy
his renovated life, when he had read that passage in the letter. He threw
up the windows, he rushed out of doors into the December air, and greeted
every one who spoke to him with an eager gaiety, as if there had been news
of a fresh Nelson victory. For the first time that day since he had come
to Windsor, he was in true boyish spirits. The load that had been pressing
upon him was gone, the haunting fear had vanished. He thought he could
conquer his bitterness towards Adam now—could offer him his hand,
and ask to be his friend again, in spite of that painful memory which
would still make his ears burn. He had been knocked down, and he had been
forced to tell a lie: such things make a scar, do what we will. But if
Adam were the same again as in the old days, Arthur wished to be the same
too, and to have Adam mixed up with his business and his future, as he had
always desired before the accursed meeting in August. Nay, he would do a
great deal more for Adam than he should otherwise have done, when he came
into the estate; Hetty's husband had a special claim on him—Hetty
herself should feel that any pain she had suffered through Arthur in the
past was compensated to her a hundredfold. For really she could not have
felt much, since she had so soon made up her mind to marry Adam.</p>
<p>You perceive clearly what sort of picture Adam and Hetty made in the
panorama of Arthur's thoughts on his journey homeward. It was March now;
they were soon to be married: perhaps they were already married. And now
it was actually in his power to do a great deal for them. Sweet—sweet
little Hetty! The little puss hadn't cared for him half as much as he
cared for her; for he was a great fool about her still—was almost
afraid of seeing her—indeed, had not cared much to look at any other
woman since he parted from her. That little figure coming towards him in
the Grove, those dark-fringed childish eyes, the lovely lips put up to
kiss him—that picture had got no fainter with the lapse of months.
And she would look just the same. It was impossible to think how he could
meet her: he should certainly tremble. Strange, how long this sort of
influence lasts, for he was certainly not in love with Hetty now. He had
been earnestly desiring, for months, that she should marry Adam, and there
was nothing that contributed more to his happiness in these moments than
the thought of their marriage. It was the exaggerating effect of
imagination that made his heart still beat a little more quickly at the
thought of her. When he saw the little thing again as she really was, as
Adam's wife, at work quite prosaically in her new home, he should perhaps
wonder at the possibility of his past feelings. Thank heaven it had turned
out so well! He should have plenty of affairs and interests to fill his
life now, and not be in danger of playing the fool again.</p>
<p>Pleasant the crack of the post-boy's whip! Pleasant the sense of being
hurried along in swift ease through English scenes, so like those round
his own home, only not quite so charming. Here was a market-town—very
much like Treddleston—where the arms of the neighbouring lord of the
manor were borne on the sign of the principal inn; then mere fields and
hedges, their vicinity to a market-town carrying an agreeable suggestion
of high rent, till the land began to assume a trimmer look, the woods were
more frequent, and at length a white or red mansion looked down from a
moderate eminence, or allowed him to be aware of its parapet and chimneys
among the dense-looking masses of oaks and elms—masses reddened now
with early buds. And close at hand came the village: the small church,
with its red-tiled roof, looking humble even among the faded half-timbered
houses; the old green gravestones with nettles round them; nothing fresh
and bright but the children, opening round eyes at the swift post-chaise;
nothing noisy and busy but the gaping curs of mysterious pedigree. What a
much prettier village Hayslope was! And it should not be neglected like
this place: vigorous repairs should go on everywhere among farm-buildings
and cottages, and travellers in post-chaises, coming along the Rosseter
road, should do nothing but admire as they went. And Adam Bede should
superintend all the repairs, for he had a share in Burge's business now,
and, if he liked, Arthur would put some money into the concern and buy the
old man out in another year or two. That was an ugly fault in Arthur's
life, that affair last summer, but the future should make amends. Many men
would have retained a feeling of vindictiveness towards Adam, but he would
not—he would resolutely overcome all littleness of that kind, for he
had certainly been very much in the wrong; and though Adam had been harsh
and violent, and had thrust on him a painful dilemma, the poor fellow was
in love, and had real provocation. No, Arthur had not an evil feeling in
his mind towards any human being: he was happy, and would make every one
else happy that came within his reach.</p>
<p>And here was dear old Hayslope at last, sleeping, on the hill, like a
quiet old place as it was, in the late afternoon sunlight, and opposite to
it the great shoulders of the Binton Hills, below them the purplish
blackness of the hanging woods, and at last the pale front of the Abbey,
looking out from among the oaks of the Chase, as if anxious for the heir's
return. "Poor Grandfather! And he lies dead there. He was a young fellow
once, coming into the estate and making his plans. So the world goes
round! Aunt Lydia must feel very desolate, poor thing; but she shall be
indulged as much as she indulges her fat Fido."</p>
<p>The wheels of Arthur's chaise had been anxiously listened for at the
Chase, for to-day was Friday, and the funeral had already been deferred
two days. Before it drew up on the gravel of the courtyard, all the
servants in the house were assembled to receive him with a grave, decent
welcome, befitting a house of death. A month ago, perhaps, it would have
been difficult for them to have maintained a suitable sadness in their
faces, when Mr. Arthur was come to take possession; but the hearts of the
head-servants were heavy that day for another cause than the death of the
old squire, and more than one of them was longing to be twenty miles away,
as Mr. Craig was, knowing what was to become of Hetty Sorrel—pretty
Hetty Sorrel—whom they used to see every week. They had the
partisanship of household servants who like their places, and were not
inclined to go the full length of the severe indignation felt against him
by the farming tenants, but rather to make excuses for him; nevertheless,
the upper servants, who had been on terms of neighbourly intercourse with
the Poysers for many years, could not help feeling that the longed-for
event of the young squire's coming into the estate had been robbed of all
its pleasantness.</p>
<p>To Arthur it was nothing surprising that the servants looked grave and
sad: he himself was very much touched on seeing them all again, and
feeling that he was in a new relation to them. It was that sort of
pathetic emotion which has more pleasure than pain in it—which is
perhaps one of the most delicious of all states to a good-natured man,
conscious of the power to satisfy his good nature. His heart swelled
agreeably as he said, "Well, Mills, how is my aunt?"</p>
<p>But now Mr. Bygate, the lawyer, who had been in the house ever since the
death, came forward to give deferential greetings and answer all
questions, and Arthur walked with him towards the library, where his Aunt
Lydia was expecting him. Aunt Lydia was the only person in the house who
knew nothing about Hetty. Her sorrow as a maiden daughter was unmixed with
any other thoughts than those of anxiety about funeral arrangements and
her own future lot; and, after the manner of women, she mourned for the
father who had made her life important, all the more because she had a
secret sense that there was little mourning for him in other hearts.</p>
<p>But Arthur kissed her tearful face more tenderly than he had ever done in
his life before.</p>
<p>"Dear Aunt," he said affectionately, as he held her hand, "YOUR loss is
the greatest of all, but you must tell me how to try and make it up to you
all the rest of your life."</p>
<p>"It was so sudden and so dreadful, Arthur," poor Miss Lydia began, pouring
out her little plaints, and Arthur sat down to listen with impatient
patience. When a pause came, he said:</p>
<p>"Now, Aunt, I'll leave you for a quarter of an hour just to go to my own
room, and then I shall come and give full attention to everything."</p>
<p>"My room is all ready for me, I suppose, Mills?" he said to the butler,
who seemed to be lingering uneasily about the entrance-hall.</p>
<p>"Yes, sir, and there are letters for you; they are all laid on the
writing-table in your dressing-room."</p>
<p>On entering the small anteroom which was called a dressing-room, but which
Arthur really used only to lounge and write in, he just cast his eyes on
the writing-table, and saw that there were several letters and packets
lying there; but he was in the uncomfortable dusty condition of a man who
has had a long hurried journey, and he must really refresh himself by
attending to his toilette a little, before he read his letters. Pym was
there, making everything ready for him, and soon, with a delightful
freshness about him, as if he were prepared to begin a new day, he went
back into his dressing-room to open his letters. The level rays of the low
afternoon sun entered directly at the window, and as Arthur seated himself
in his velvet chair with their pleasant warmth upon him, he was conscious
of that quiet well-being which perhaps you and I have felt on a sunny
afternoon when, in our brightest youth and health, life has opened a new
vista for us, and long to-morrows of activity have stretched before us
like a lovely plain which there was no need for hurrying to look at,
because it was all our own.</p>
<p>The top letter was placed with its address upwards: it was in Mr. Irwine's
handwriting, Arthur saw at once; and below the address was written, "To be
delivered as soon as he arrives." Nothing could have been less surprising
to him than a letter from Mr. Irwine at that moment: of course, there was
something he wished Arthur to know earlier than it was possible for them
to see each other. At such a time as that it was quite natural that Irwine
should have something pressing to say. Arthur broke the seal with an
agreeable anticipation of soon seeing the writer.</p>
<p>"I send this letter to meet you on your arrival, Arthur, because I may
then be at Stoniton, whither I am called by the most painful duty it has
ever been given me to perform, and it is right that you should know what I
have to tell you without delay.</p>
<p>"I will not attempt to add by one word of reproach to the retribution that
is now falling on you: any other words that I could write at this moment
must be weak and unmeaning by the side of those in which I must tell you
the simple fact.</p>
<p>"Hetty Sorrel is in prison, and will be tried on Friday for the crime of
child-murder."...</p>
<p>Arthur read no more. He started up from his chair and stood for a single
minute with a sense of violent convulsion in his whole frame, as if the
life were going out of him with horrible throbs; but the next minute he
had rushed out of the room, still clutching the letter—he was
hurrying along the corridor, and down the stairs into the hall. Mills was
still there, but Arthur did not see him, as he passed like a hunted man
across the hall and out along the gravel. The butler hurried out after him
as fast as his elderly limbs could run: he guessed, he knew, where the
young squire was going.</p>
<p>When Mills got to the stables, a horse was being saddled, and Arthur was
forcing himself to read the remaining words of the letter. He thrust it
into his pocket as the horse was led up to him, and at that moment caught
sight of Mills' anxious face in front of him.</p>
<p>"Tell them I'm gone—gone to Stoniton," he said in a muffled tone of
agitation—sprang into the saddle, and set off at a gallop.</p>
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