<h2><SPAN name="CHAPTER_FOUR" id="CHAPTER_FOUR">CHAPTER FOUR</SPAN><br/> <small>Trapped!</small></h2>
<p>Afterward, when I had found my way back to the Crimson Tower, I
searched for hours for something that might give a clue to Adric's
mystifying past. I was puzzled about this Adric who came and went as he
pleased in the chambers of my memory. But I found nothing; whoever had
stolen Adric's memory, had made sure that nothing in his surroundings
should clear up the puzzle in his mind. I knew only one thing. Adric
was feared, disliked, distrusted by all the Narabedlans, and all except
Gamine had something to gain by feigning friendship. I could not decide
whether Karamy's attitude was love that pretended contempt to mold
Adric, or me, to her will, or contempt that pretended love for the same
reason. And although habit found affection for Evarin, I could not
trust him long. Trust a cyclone sooner than that half-mad effeminate!
The name, <b>Narayan</b>, stuck burr-like in my mind. Friend, or enemy?
I sat at the barred window of Adric's high room, trying to force memory
from the alien mind in which I was prisoner. And whether it was sheer
effort of will, or the result of the fragmentary look in Evarin's
mirror, or whether, as Gamine insisted, I was really Adric and Mike
Kenscott was a mere superficial illusion of my conscious mind, memory
did begin to pulse back.</p>
<p>In the early days....</p>
<p>In the early days, before the vagueness came on my mind, I, Adric of
the Crimson Tower, had been a power in the Rainbow City. The memories
of that time were not the kind Mike Kenscott would have cared to own,
but I, as Adric, found them vastly pleasing. Unlike Gamine, who loved
only knowledge, or Evarin, who toyed with pleasure and trickery, I had
wanted power. I had it, unlimited, from a Dreamer who stirred only
vaguely in sleep. Half the known portions of this world had known the
Crimson Tower as lord. And Karamy—</p>
<p>Some memories were triumphant. Some were humorous in Adric's cynical
mind. Some were terrible beyond guessing—for Adric had not counted
cost, and even he shuddered from the price the Dreamer had exacted.</p>
<p>Then, to this wilful and wild man, something had happened. I had no
idea what; Karamy had reached that far back and blurred, though not
entirely erased, my memory. It had something to do with a blond boy's
face, lifted in incredulous terror—or joy; and a fleeing form, veiled,
that retreated down the long corridor of my mind, averting its face
as I followed. Whatever had happened, it had come when Adric was sick
with blood and horror, when he was surfeited, even if momentarily, with
conquest, and sickened at the price the Dreamer extorted. The power,
forced through the mind of the Dreamer, called for energy; kinetic
energy, available from one source and one only. Adric had fed the
Dreamer with that power. For a while.</p>
<p>One day, as a whim, I had redeemed a young woman slave—then the
vagueness came and choked me. I might think; I might burst my brain,
but so far and no farther my memories would carry me. I <b>could
not</b> force memory of that chain of events. But after that, Adric's
reign had collapsed like the unstable arch it had been. His armies
scattered, and he had shut himself up or been imprisoned in his Tower;
his memories had been stolen and he had gone, or been sent, spinning
along a time line forward, or perhaps back, until somewhere in the
abyss of time he touched Mike Kenscott.</p>
<p>It had been then, perhaps, that Adric had escaped. He had reached,
drawn Mike Kenscott back—and switched the two. It was a perfect escape
from a life Adric had come to hate.</p>
<p>But I <b>was</b> Adric. There was an explanation for that, too. The
physical body could not make the transit in time. I had Adric's body;
the convolutions of his brain, the synaptic links of habit. His memory
banks. Only the Ego, the super-imposed pattern of the conscious
identity, insisted I was Mike Kenscott. In Adric's body, the old
patterns ruled, and to all intents and purposes, I <b>was</b> Adric.
And back in my own time, I thought, Adric was living in my body—living
Mike Kenscott's life, going through the motions, with only the same
queer lapses I was making here. And after a while, even these would
stop. I was wholly trapped. Here, living Adric's life, the part of me
that was Adric would grow stronger and stronger till—he?—unseated the
other identity wholly. And he, in my body? Andy, I thought with a wild
swift fear, <b>what will he do to Andy</b>?</p>
<p>Nothing. He could not hurt Andy—not in my pattern—any more than I
could hate Evarin. Or could he?</p>
<p>I had to get back! God, I <b>had</b> to get back!</p>
<p>When the white sun had set and the red sun glowed a darkening ember
across the Sierra, a summons came, brought by one of Karamy's
toy-soldier cohorts. I dressed—in crimson again, for there was no
other clothing anywhere—and followed the voiceless sentry down through
a labyrinth of elevators, finally emerging into a long corridor. I
strode down it, hearing my own steps echo; a second rhythm joined them
imperceptibly, and Gamine stole out of the darkness, swathed in the
luminous veiling, creeping noiselessly as a ghost behind me. Later I
became conscious of Evarin's padding cat-steps behind Gamine, trailing
us, single-file. And other figures came from darkened recesses to
stretch the silent parade; a slim girl in a winged cloak, flame color;
a dwarfed man who walked beneath the amethyst huddle of purple cap and
furs. Memory fitted names to them, but I did not speak to them, or they
to me.</p>
<p>After a long time, the immense corridor began to tilt upward, climbing
toward a glimmer of light at the end. Without realizing it I had swung
into an arrogant, loping stride; now I brushed away the slave-soldier
who headed the column and took the lead myself. Behind me the others
fell into place as if I had bidden them; the flame-clothed girl in the
winged cloak, the cat-footed Evarin, the dwarf bent in his jester's
cap, Gamine in the blue shroud. Without warning, we came out into a
vast court; an enclosed space, yet wide as the outdoors, a yard, a
plaza, a place of imposing grandeur. A place of memory.</p>
<p>The red sun above us glowed like a lurid coal. There were tall pillars
on three sides of the courtyard, and at the far end, a vaulted archway
led into a treelined drive that stretched away for miles into the
twilight. Between two pillars, Karamy waited; slim, shimmering golden
from head to foot. A hungry impatience sparked in her cat's eyes.
"You're late."</p>
<p>"I'm ready," I said. What I was ready for, I was not sure.</p>
<p>Karamy waved an impatient signal to the Narabedlans who were coming up.
"Adric is with us again," she said in her curious lazy voice, "Your
allegiance to Adric—children of the Rainbow!"</p>
<p>I stood at her side, mute, waiting; a guard of silent men behind us.
"Lord Idris;" Karamy summoned. The hunchback came to bow jerkily before
us. "Welcome home—Lord!"</p>
<p>The girl in flame-color darted to where we stood and her dipping curtsy
was like the waver of a moth toward a flame. "Adric—" she murmured.
The wings of her cloak lifted and fluttered across her shoulders as if
they would fly of themselves. She was a shy thing, and her dark hair
waved softly as if it too were winged. I touched her fingers lightly,
but under the smolder of Karamy's gaze I let her go. She watched me,
shyly, with averted face.</p>
<p>Evarin's face was slyly malicious, but his voice was pure silk. "It
is—pleasure to follow you again, my brother," he almost purred, and I
scowled at the mockery at his face and refused his offered hand. Only
Gamine said nothing, coming forward on gliding feet to bow briefly
and retire; but the silver-sweet, sexless voice of the spell-singer
murmured in a singing, almost wordless, croon.</p>
<p>"Save your spells, Gamine," said Karamy savagely, and Evarin jerked
round at the shrouded form, but Gamine heeded neither of them, and the
sweet contralto chanting went on.</p>
<p>From somewhere the silent men brought horses. Horses—here, in this
nightmare world? I had never been on a horse in my life. I found myself
vaulting, with a nice co-ordination of movement, into the saddle. The
courtyard, for all the bustle of department, seemed to hold the silence
of a grave. Karamy kept me close to her. When we were all mounted, she
threw the amber rod upward, and the last rays of the red sun caught
its rays and sent a pure shaft of light down the darkened alleyway
lined with trees. At the sight of that gleam, a curiously familiar
emotion stole through me. I threw up one arm over my head, mimicking
Karamy's gesture. "Ride!" I shouted.</p>
<p>And the flying steeds kept pace with mine.</p>
<p>The driveway under the arch of trees led for miles under the thick
boughs. Through the easy drumming of hooves, I could still hear the
sweet distant sound of Gamine's singing, which floated on the wind,
keeping pace with the rise and fall of the rolling road, in a quick
cadence. The wind whipped Karamy's golden hair like a halo about
her head. I glanced over my shoulder to where the rainbow towers
stood, now black, silhouetted against the greater darkness of the
mountains. Overhead in the pink sky, the crescent of the tiny moon was
brightening, and lower in the sky I saw another, wider disc, nearly at
full. Cold air was stinging my cheeks and nipping my bones with frost,
and I felt the sparks struck from hooves beating on the frozen ground.</p>
<p><b>Cold!</b> Yet in Karamy's garden flowers had glowed in a tropical
glory—</p>
<p>And for a moment, it was entirely Mike Kenscott—sick, bewildered and
panicky—who glanced about him with horror, feeling the swirling cold
and a colder chill from the golden sorceress at my side. It was Mike
Kenscott's will that jerked at the reins of the big gelding to end this
farce now—</p>
<p>"What is it?" Karamy cried, over the noise of the hooves.</p>
<p>And I heard my own voice, raised above the galloping rhythm, cry back
"Nothing!" and call out a command to the horse.</p>
<p>Good God! I was Mike Kenscott—but prisoner in a body that would
not obey me—a mind that persisted in thoughts and habits I could
not share, a—soul?—that would carry me to destruction! I was Mike
Kenscott—trapped on a nightmare ride through hell!</p>
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