<h2>XVII. TWO FAINTING FITS AND A BEWILDERMENT</h2>
<p>Meanwhile Miller Loveday was expecting the pair with interest;
and about five o’clock, after repeated outlooks, he saw two
specks the size of caraway seeds on the far line of ridge where
the sunlit white of the road met the blue of the sky. Then
the remainder parts of Bob and his lady became visible, and then
the whole vehicle, end on, and he heard the dry rattle of the
wheels on the dusty road. Miller Loveday’s plan, as
far as he had formed any, was that Robert and his wife should
live with him in the millhouse until Mrs. Garland made up her
mind to join him there; in which event her present house would be
made over to the young couple. Upon all grounds, he wished
to welcome becomingly the woman of his son’s choice, and
came forward promptly as they drew up at the door.</p>
<p>‘What a lovely place you’ve got here!’ said
Miss Johnson, when the miller had received her from the
captain. ‘A real stream of water, a real mill-wheel,
and real fowls, and everything!’</p>
<p>‘Yes, ’tis real enough,’ said Loveday,
looking at the river with balanced sentiments; ‘and so you
will say when you’ve lived here a bit as mis’ess, and
had the trouble of claning the furniture.’</p>
<p>At this Miss Johnson looked modest, and continued to do so
till Anne, not knowing they were there, came round the corner of
the house, with her prayer-book in her hand, having just arrived
from church. Bob turned and smiled to her, at which Miss
Johnson looked glum. How long she would have remained in
that phase is unknown, for just then her ears were assailed by a
loud bass note from the other side, causing her to jump
round.</p>
<p>‘O la! what dreadful thing is it?’ she exclaimed,
and beheld a cow of Loveday’s, of the name of Crumpler,
standing close to her shoulder. It being about
milking-time, she had come to look up David and hasten on the
operation.</p>
<p>‘O, what a horrid bull!—it did frighten me
so. I hope I shan’t faint,’ said Matilda.</p>
<p>The miller immediately used the formula which has been uttered
by the proprietors of live stock ever since Noah’s
time. ‘She won’t hurt ye. Hoosh,
Crumpler! She’s as timid as a mouse,
ma’am.’</p>
<p>But as Crumpler persisted in making another terrific inquiry
for David, Matilda could not help closing her eyes and saying,
‘O, I shall be gored to death!’ her head falling back
upon Bob’s shoulder, which—seeing the urgent
circumstances, and knowing her delicate nature—he had
providentially placed in a position to catch her. Anne
Garland, who had been standing at the corner of the house, not
knowing whether to go back or come on, at this felt her womanly
sympathies aroused. She ran and dipped her handkerchief
into the splashing mill-tail, and with it damped Matilda’s
face. But as her eyes still remained closed, Bob, to
increase the effect, took the handkerchief from Anne and wrung it
out on the bridge of Matilda’s nose, whence it ran over the
rest of her face in a stream.</p>
<p>‘O, Captain Loveday!’ said Anne, ‘the water
is running over her green silk handkerchief, and into her pretty
reticule!’</p>
<p>‘There—if I didn’t think so!’
exclaimed Matilda, opening her eyes, starting up, and promptly
pulling out her own handkerchief, with which she wiped away the
drops, and an unimportant trifle of her complexion, assisted by
Anne, who, in spite of her background of antagonistic emotions,
could not help being interested.</p>
<p>‘That’s right!’ said the miller, his spirits
reviving with the revival of Matilda. ‘The lady is
not used to country life; are you, ma’am?’</p>
<p>‘I am not,’ replied the sufferer. ‘All
is so strange about here!’</p>
<p>Suddenly there spread into the firmament, from the direction
of the down:—</p>
<blockquote><p>‘Ra, ta, ta! Ta-ta-ta-ta-ta! Ra,
ta, ta!’</p>
</blockquote>
<p>‘O dear, dear! more hideous country sounds, I
suppose?’ she inquired, with another start.</p>
<p>‘O no,’ said the miller cheerfully.
‘’Tis only my son John’s trumpeter chaps at the
camp of dragoons just above us, a-blowing Mess, or Feed, or
Picket, or some other of their vagaries. John will be much
pleased to tell you the meaning on’t when he comes
down. He’s trumpet-major, as you may know,
ma’am.’</p>
<p>‘O yes; you mean Captain Loveday’s brother.
Dear Bob has mentioned him.’</p>
<p>‘If you come round to Widow Garland’s side of the
house, you can see the camp,’ said the miller.</p>
<p>‘Don’t force her; she’s tired with her long
journey,’ said Mrs. Garland humanely, the widow having come
out in the general wish to see Captain Bob’s choice.
Indeed, they all behaved towards her as if she were a tender
exotic, which their crude country manners might seriously
injure.</p>
<p>She went into the house, accompanied by Mrs. Garland and her
daughter; though before leaving Bob she managed to whisper in his
ear, ‘Don’t tell them I came by waggon, will you,
dear?’—a request which was quite needless, for Bob
had long ago determined to keep that a dead secret; not because
it was an uncommon mode of travel, but simply that it was hardly
the usual conveyance for a gorgeous lady to her bridal.</p>
<p>As the men had a feeling that they would be superfluous
indoors just at present, the miller assisted David in taking the
horse round to the stables, Bob following, and leaving Matilda to
the women. Indoors, Miss Johnson admired everything: the
new parrots and marmosets, the black beams of the ceiling, the
double-corner cupboard with the glass doors, through which
gleamed the remainders of sundry china sets acquired by
Bob’s mother in her housekeeping—two-handled
sugar-basins, no-handled tea-cups, a tea-pot like a pagoda, and a
cream-jug in the form of a spotted cow. This sociability in
their visitor was returned by Mrs. Garland and Anne; and Miss
Johnson’s pleasing habit of partly dying whenever she heard
any unusual bark or bellow added to her piquancy in their
eyes. But conversation, as such, was naturally at first of
a nervous, tentative kind, in which, as in the works of some
minor poets, the sense was considerably led by the sound.</p>
<p>‘You get the sea-breezes here, no doubt?’</p>
<p>‘O yes, dear; when the wind is that way.’</p>
<p>‘Do you like windy weather?’</p>
<p>‘Yes; though not now, for it blows down the young
apples.’</p>
<p>‘Apples are plentiful, it seems. You country-folk
call St. Swithin’s their christening day, if it
rains?’</p>
<p>‘Yes, dear. Ah me! I have not been to a
christening for these many years; the baby’s name was
George, I remember—after the King.’</p>
<p>‘I hear that King George is still staying at the town
here. I <i>hope</i> he’ll stay till I have seen
him!’</p>
<p>‘He’ll wait till the corn turns yellow; he always
does.’</p>
<p>‘How <i>very</i> fashionable yellow is getting for
gloves just now!’</p>
<p>‘Yes. Some persons wear them to the elbow, I
hear.’</p>
<p>‘Do they? I was not aware of that. I struck
my elbow last week so hard against the door of my aunt’s
mansion that I feel the ache now.’</p>
<p>Before they were quite overwhelmed by the interest of this
discourse, the miller and Bob came in. In truth, Mrs.
Garland found the office in which he had placed her—that of
introducing a strange woman to a house which was not the
widow’s own—a rather awkward one, and yet almost a
necessity. There was no woman belonging to the house except
that wondrous compendium of usefulness, the intermittent
maid-servant, whom Loveday had, for appearances, borrowed from
Mrs. Garland, and Mrs. Garland was in the habit of borrowing from
the girl’s mother. And as for the demi-woman David,
he had been informed as peremptorily as Pharaoh’s baker
that the office of housemaid and bedmaker was taken from him, and
would be given to this girl till the wedding was over, and
Bob’s wife took the management into her own hands.</p>
<p>They all sat down to high tea, Anne and her mother included,
and the captain sitting next to Miss Johnson. Anne had put
a brave face upon the matter—outwardly, at least—and
seemed in a fair way of subduing any lingering sentiment which
Bob’s return had revived. During the evening, and
while they still sat over the meal, John came down on a hurried
visit, as he had promised, ostensibly on purpose to be introduced
to his intended sister-in-law, but much more to get a word and a
smile from his beloved Anne. Before they saw him, they
heard the trumpet-major’s smart step coming round the
corner of the house, and in a moment his form darkened the
door. As it was Sunday, he appeared in his full-dress laced
coat, white waistcoat and breeches, and towering plume, the
latter of which he instantly lowered, as much from necessity as
good manners, the beam in the mill-house ceiling having a
tendency to smash and ruin all such head-gear without
warning.</p>
<p>‘John, we’ve been hoping you would come
down,’ said the miller, ‘and so we have kept the tay
about on purpose. Draw up, and speak to Mrs. Matilda
Johnson. . . . Ma’am, this is Robert’s
brother.’</p>
<p>‘Your humble servant, ma’am,’ said the
trumpet-major gallantly.</p>
<p>As it was getting dusk in the low, small-paned room, he
instinctively moved towards Miss Johnson as he spoke, who sat
with her back to the window. He had no sooner noticed her
features than his helmet nearly fell from his hand; his face
became suddenly fixed, and his natural complexion took itself
off, leaving a greenish yellow in its stead. The young
person, on her part, had no sooner looked closely at him than she
said weakly, ‘Robert’s brother!’ and changed
colour yet more rapidly than the soldier had done. The
faintness, previously half counterfeit, seized on her now in real
earnest.</p>
<p>‘I don’t feel well,’ she said, suddenly
rising by an effort. ‘This warm day has quite upset
me!’</p>
<p>There was a regular collapse of the tea-party, like that of
the Hamlet play scene. Bob seized his sweetheart and
carried her upstairs, the miller exclaiming, ‘Ah,
she’s terribly worn by the journey! I thought she was
when I saw her nearly go off at the blare of the cow. No
woman would have been frightened at that if she’d been up
to her natural strength.’</p>
<p>‘That, and being so very shy of men, too, must have made
John’s handsome regimentals quite overpowering to her, poor
thing,’ added Mrs. Garland, following the catastrophic
young lady upstairs, whose indisposition was this time beyond
question. And yet, by some perversity of the heart, she was
as eager now to make light of her faintness as she had been to
make much of it two or three hours ago.</p>
<p>The miller and John stood like straight sticks in the room the
others had quitted, John’s face being hastily turned
towards a caricature of Buonaparte on the wall that he had not
seen more than a hundred and fifty times before.</p>
<p>‘Come, sit down and have a dish of tea, anyhow,’
said his father at last. ‘She’ll soon be right
again, no doubt.’</p>
<p>‘Thanks; I don’t want any tea,’ said John
quickly. And, indeed, he did not, for he was in one
gigantic ache from head to foot.</p>
<p>The light had been too dim for anybody to notice his
amazement; and not knowing where to vent it, the trumpet-major
said he was going out for a minute. He hastened to the
bakehouse; but David being there, he went to the pantry; but the
maid being there, he went to the cart-shed; but a couple of
tramps being there, he went behind a row of French beans in the
garden, where he let off an ejaculation the most pious that he
had uttered that Sabbath day: ‘Heaven! what’s to be
done!’</p>
<p>And then he walked wildly about the paths of the dusky garden,
where the trickling of the brooks seemed loud by comparison with
the stillness around; treading recklessly on the cracking snails
that had come forth to feed, and entangling his spurs in the long
grass till the rowels were choked with its blades.
Presently he heard another person approaching, and his
brother’s shape appeared between the stubbard tree and the
hedge.</p>
<p>‘O, is it you?’ said the mate.</p>
<p>‘Yes. I am—taking a little air.’</p>
<p>‘She is getting round nicely again; and as I am not
wanted indoors just now, I am going into the village to call upon
a friend or two I have not been able to speak to as
yet.’</p>
<p>John took his brother Bob’s hand. Bob rather
wondered why.</p>
<p>‘All right, old boy,’ he said. ‘Going
into the village? You’ll be back again, I suppose,
before it gets very late?’</p>
<p>‘O yes,’ said Captain Bob cheerfully, and passed
out of the garden.</p>
<p>John allowed his eyes to follow his brother till his shape
could not be seen, and then he turned and again walked up and
down.</p>
<div style="break-after:column;"></div><br />