<h2>VI. OLD MR. DERRIMAN OF OXWELL HALL</h2>
<p>At this time in the history of Overcombe one solitary
newspaper occasionally found its way into the village. It
was lent by the postmaster at Budmouth (who, in some mysterious
way, got it for nothing through his connexion with the mail) to
Mr. Derriman at the Hall, by whom it was handed on to Mrs.
Garland when it was not more than a fortnight old. Whoever
remembers anything about the old farmer-squire will, of course,
know well enough that this delightful privilege of reading
history in long columns was not accorded to the Widow Garland for
nothing. It was by such ingenuous means that he paid her
for her daughter’s occasional services in reading aloud to
him and making out his accounts, in which matters the farmer,
whose guineas were reported to touch five figures—some said
more—was not expert.</p>
<p>Mrs. Martha Garland, as a respectable widow, occupied a
twilight rank between the benighted villagers and the
well-informed gentry, and kindly made herself useful to the
former as letter-writer and reader, and general translator from
the printing tongue. It was not without satisfaction that
she stood at her door of an evening, newspaper in hand, with
three or four cottagers standing round, and poured down their
open throats any paragraph that she might choose to select from
the stirring ones of the period. When she had done with the
sheet Mrs. Garland passed it on to the miller, the miller to the
grinder, and the grinder to the grinder’s boy, in whose
hands it became subdivided into half pages, quarter pages, and
irregular triangles, and ended its career as a paper cap, a
flagon bung, or a wrapper for his bread and cheese.</p>
<p>Notwithstanding his compact with Mrs. Garland, old Mr.
Derriman kept the paper so long, and was so chary of wasting his
man’s time on a merely intellectual errand, that unless she
sent for the journal it seldom reached her hands. Anne was
always her messenger. The arrival of the soldiers led Mrs.
Garland to despatch her daughter for it the day after the party;
and away she went in her hat and pelisse, in a direction at right
angles to that of the encampment on the hill.</p>
<p>Walking across the fields for the distance of a mile or two,
she came out upon the high-road by a wicket-gate. On the
other side of the way was the entrance to what at first sight
looked like a neglected meadow, the gate being a rotten one,
without a bottom rail, and broken-down palings lying on each
side. The dry hard mud of the opening was marked with
several horse and cow tracks, that had been half obliterated by
fifty score sheep tracks, surcharged with the tracks of a man and
a dog. Beyond this geological record appeared a
carriage-road, nearly grown over with grass, which Anne
followed. It descended by a gentle slope, dived under
dark-rinded elm and chestnut trees, and conducted her on till the
hiss of a waterfall and the sound of the sea became audible, when
it took a bend round a swamp of fresh watercress and brooklime
that had once been a fish pond. Here the grey, weather-worn
front of a building edged from behind the trees. It was
Oxwell Hall, once the seat of a family now extinct, and of late
years used as a farmhouse.</p>
<p>Benjamin Derriman, who owned the crumbling place, had
originally been only the occupier and tenant-farmer of the fields
around. His wife had brought him a small fortune, and
during the growth of their only son there had been a partition of
the Oxwell estate, giving the farmer, now a widower, the
opportunity of acquiring the building and a small portion of the
land attached on exceptionally low terms. But two years
after the purchase the boy died, and Derriman’s existence
was paralyzed forthwith. It was said that since that event
he had devised the house and fields to a distant female relative,
to keep them out of the hands of his detested nephew; but this
was not certainly known.</p>
<p>The hall was as interesting as mansions in a state of
declension usually are, as the excellent county history
showed. That popular work in folio contained an old plate
dedicated to the last scion of the original owners, from which
drawing it appeared that in 1750, the date of publication, the
windows were covered with little scratches like black flashes of
lightning; that a horn of hard smoke came out of each of the
twelve chimneys; that a lady and a lap-dog stood on the lawn in a
strenuously walking position; and a substantial cloud and nine
flying birds of no known species hung over the trees to the
north-east.</p>
<p>The rambling and neglected dwelling had all the romantic
excellencies and practical drawbacks which such mildewed places
share in common with caves, mountains, wildernesses, glens, and
other homes of poesy that people of taste wish to live and die
in. Mustard and cress could have been raised on the inner
plaster of the dewy walls at any height not exceeding three feet
from the floor; and mushrooms of the most refined and
thin-stemmed kinds grew up through the chinks of the larder
paving. As for the outside, Nature, in the ample time that
had been given her, had so mingled her filings and effacements
with the marks of human wear and tear upon the house, that it was
often hard to say in which of the two or if in both, any
particular obliteration had its origin. The keenness was
gone from the mouldings of the doorways, but whether worn out by
the rubbing past of innumerable people’s shoulders, and the
moving of their heavy furniture, or by Time in a grander and more
abstract form, did not appear. The iron stanchions inside
the window-panes were eaten away to the size of wires at the
bottom where they entered the stone, the condensed breathings of
generations having settled there in pools and rusted them.
The panes themselves had either lost their shine altogether or
become iridescent as a peacock’s tail. In the middle
of the porch was a vertical sun-dial, whose gnomon swayed loosely
about when the wind blew, and cast its shadow hither and thither,
as much as to say, ‘Here’s your fine model dial;
here’s any time for any man; I am an old dial; and
shiftiness is the best policy.’</p>
<p>Anne passed under the arched gateway which screened the main
front; over it was the porter’s lodge, reached by a spiral
staircase. Across the archway was fixed a row of wooden
hurdles, one of which Anne opened and closed behind her.
Their necessity was apparent as soon as she got inside. The
quadrangle of the ancient pile was a bed of mud and manure,
inhabited by calves, geese, ducks, and sow pigs surprisingly
large, with young ones surprisingly small. In the groined
porch some heifers were amusing themselves by stretching up their
necks and licking the carved stone capitals that supported the
vaulting. Anne went on to a second and open door, across
which was another hurdle to keep the live stock from absolute
community with the inmates. There being no knocker, she
knocked by means of a short stick which was laid against the post
for that purpose; but nobody attending, she entered the passage,
and tried an inner door.</p>
<p>A slight noise was heard inside, the door opened about an
inch, and a strip of decayed face, including the eye and some
forehead wrinkles, appeared within the crevice.</p>
<p>‘Please I have come for the paper,’ said Anne.</p>
<p>‘O, is it you, dear Anne?’ whined the inmate,
opening the door a little further. ‘I could hardly
get to the door to open it, I am so weak.’</p>
<p>The speaker was a wizened old gentleman, in a coat the colour
of his farmyard, breeches of the same hue, unbuttoned at the
knees, revealing a bit of leg above his stocking and a dazzlingly
white shirt-frill to compensate for this untidiness below.
The edge of his skull round his eye-sockets was visible through
the skin, and he had a mouth whose corners made towards the back
of his head on the slightest provocation. He walked with
great apparent difficulty back into the room, Anne following
him.</p>
<p>‘Well, you can have the paper if you want it; but you
never give me much time to see what’s in en!
Here’s the paper.’ He held it out, but before
she could take it he drew it back again, saying, ‘I have
not had my share o’ the paper by a good deal, what with my
weak sight, and people coming so soon for en. I am a poor
put-upon soul; but my “Duty of Man” will be left to
me when the newspaper is gone.’ And he sank into his
chair with an air of exhaustion.</p>
<p>Anne said that she did not wish to take the paper if he had
not done with it, and that she was really later in the week than
usual, owing to the soldiers.</p>
<p>‘Soldiers, yes—rot the soldiers! And now
hedges will be broke, and hens’ nests robbed, and
sucking-pigs stole, and I don’t know what all.
Who’s to pay for’t, sure? I reckon that because
the soldiers be come you don’t mean to be kind enough to
read to me what I hadn’t time to read myself.’</p>
<p>She would read if he wished, she said; she was in no
hurry. And sitting herself down she unfolded the paper.</p>
<p>‘“Dinner at Carlton House”?’</p>
<p>‘No, faith. ’Tis nothing to I.’</p>
<p>‘“Defence of the country”?’</p>
<p>‘Ye may read that if ye will. I hope there will be
no billeting in this parish, or any wild work of that sort; for
what would a poor old lamiger like myself do with soldiers in his
house, and nothing to feed ’em with?’</p>
<p>Anne began reading, and continued at her task nearly ten
minutes, when she was interrupted by the appearance in the
quadrangular slough without of a large figure in the uniform of
the yeomanry cavalry.</p>
<p>‘What do you see out there?’ said the farmer with
a start, as she paused and slowly blushed.</p>
<p>‘A soldier—one of the yeomanry,’ said Anne,
not quite at her ease.</p>
<p>‘Scrounch it all—’tis my nephew!’
exclaimed the old man, his face turning to a phosphoric pallor,
and his body twitching with innumerable alarms as he formed upon
his face a gasping smile of joy, with which to welcome the
new-coming relative. ‘Read on, prithee, Miss
Garland.’</p>
<p>Before she had read far the visitor straddled over the
door-hurdle into the passage and entered the room.</p>
<p>‘Well, nunc, how do you feel?’ said the giant,
shaking hands with the farmer in the manner of one violently
ringing a hand-bell. ‘Glad to see you.’</p>
<p>‘Bad and weakish, Festus,’ replied the other, his
person responding passively to the rapid vibrations
imparted. ‘O, be tender, please—a little
softer, there’s a dear nephew! My arm is no more than
a cobweb.’</p>
<p>‘Ah, poor soul!’</p>
<p>‘Yes, I am not much more than a skeleton, and
can’t bear rough usage.’</p>
<p>‘Sorry to hear that; but I’ll bear your affliction
in mind. Why, you are all in a tremble, Uncle
Benjy!’</p>
<p>‘’Tis because I am so gratified,’ said the
old man. ‘I always get all in a tremble when I am
taken by surprise by a beloved relation.’</p>
<p>‘Ah, that’s it!’ said the yeoman, bringing
his hand down on the back of his uncle’s chair with a loud
smack, at which Uncle Benjy nervously sprang three inches from
his seat and dropped into it again. ‘Ask your pardon
for frightening ye, uncle. ’Tis how we do in the
army, and I forgot your nerves. You have scarcely expected
to see me, I dare say, but here I am.’</p>
<p>‘I am glad to see ye. You are not going to stay
long, perhaps?’</p>
<p>‘Quite the contrary. I am going to stay ever so
long!’</p>
<p>‘O I see! I am so glad, dear Festus. Ever so
long, did ye say?’</p>
<p>‘Yes, <i>ever</i> so long,’ said the young
gentleman, sitting on the slope of the bureau and stretching out
his legs as props. ‘I am going to make this quite my
own home whenever I am off duty, as long as we stay out.
And after that, when the campaign is over in the autumn, I shall
come here, and live with you like your own son, and help manage
your land and your farm, you know, and make you a comfortable old
man.’</p>
<p>‘Ah! How you do please me!’ said the farmer,
with a horrified smile, and grasping the arms of his chair to
sustain himself.</p>
<p>‘Yes; I have been meaning to come a long time, as I knew
you’d like to have me, Uncle Benjy; and ’tisn’t
in my heart to refuse you.’</p>
<p>‘You always was kind that way!’</p>
<p>‘Yes; I always was. But I ought to tell you at
once, not to disappoint you, that I shan’t be here
always—all day, that is, because of my military duties as a
cavalry man.’</p>
<p>‘O, not always? That’s a pity!’
exclaimed the farmer with a cheerful eye.</p>
<p>‘I knew you’d say so. And I shan’t be
able to sleep here at night sometimes, for the same
reason.’</p>
<p>‘Not sleep here o’ nights?’ said the old
gentleman, still more relieved. ‘You ought to sleep
here—you certainly ought; in short, you must. But you
can’t!’</p>
<p>‘Not while we are with the colours. But directly
that’s over—the very next day—I’ll stay
here all day, and all night too, to oblige you, since you ask me
so very kindly.’</p>
<p>‘Th-thank ye, that will be very nice!’ said Uncle
Benjy.</p>
<p>‘Yes, I knew ’twould relieve ye.’ And
he kindly stroked his uncle’s head, the old man expressing
his enjoyment at the affectionate token by a death’s-head
grimace. ‘I should have called to see you the other
night when I passed through here,’ Festus continued;
‘but it was so late that I couldn’t come so far out
of my way. You won’t think it unkind?’</p>
<p>‘Not at all, if you <i>couldn’t</i>. I never
shall think it unkind if you really <i>can’t</i> come, you
know, Festy.’ There was a few minutes’ pause,
and as the nephew said nothing Uncle Benjy went on: ‘I wish
I had a little present for ye. But as ill-luck would have
it we have lost a deal of stock this year, and I have had to pay
away so much.’</p>
<p>‘Poor old man—I know you have. Shall I lend
you a seven-shilling piece, Uncle Benjy?’</p>
<p>‘Ha, ha!—you must have your joke; well, I’ll
think o’ that. And so they expect Buonaparty to
choose this very part of the coast for his landing, hey?
And that the yeomanry be to stand in front as the forlorn
hope?’</p>
<p>‘Who says so?’ asked the florid son of Mars,
losing a little redness.</p>
<p>‘The newspaper-man.’</p>
<p>‘O, there’s nothing in that,’ said Festus
bravely. ‘The gover’ment thought it possible at
one time; but they don’t know.’</p>
<p>Festus turned himself as he talked, and now said abruptly:
‘Ah, who’s this? Why, ’tis our little
Anne!’ He had not noticed her till this moment, the
young woman having at his entry kept her face over the newspaper,
and then got away to the back part of the room. ‘And
are you and your mother always going to stay down there in the
mill-house watching the little fishes, Miss Anne?’</p>
<p>She said that it was uncertain, in a tone of truthful
precision which the question was hardly worth, looking forcedly
at him as she spoke. But she blushed fitfully, in her arms
and hands as much as in her face. Not that she was
overpowered by the great boots, formidable spurs, and other
fierce appliances of his person, as he imagined; simply she had
not been prepared to meet him there.</p>
<p>‘I hope you will, I am sure, for my own good,’
said he, letting his eyes linger on the round of her cheek.</p>
<p>Anne became a little more dignified, and her look showed
reserve. But the yeoman on perceiving this went on talking
to her in so civil a way that he irresistibly amused her, though
she tried to conceal all feeling. At a brighter remark of
his than usual her mouth moved, her upper lip playing uncertainly
over her white teeth; it would stay still—no, it would
withdraw a little way in a smile; then it would flutter down
again; and so it wavered like a butterfly in a tender desire to
be pleased and smiling, and yet to be also sedate and composed;
to show him that she did not want compliments, and yet that she
was not so cold as to wish to repress any genuine feeling he
might be anxious to utter.</p>
<p>‘Shall you want any more reading, Mr. Derriman?’
said she, interrupting the younger man in his remarks.
‘If not, I’ll go homeward.’</p>
<p>‘Don’t let me hinder you longer,’ said
Festus. ‘I’m off in a minute or two, when your
man has cleaned my boots.’</p>
<p>‘Ye don’t hinder us, nephew. She must have
the paper: ’tis the day for her to have ’n. She
might read a little more, as I have had so little profit out
o’ en hitherto. Well, why don’t ye speak?
Will ye, or won’t ye, my dear?’</p>
<p>‘Not to two,’ she said.</p>
<p>‘Ho, ho! damn it, I must go then, I suppose,’ said
Festus, laughing; and unable to get a further glance from her he
left the room and clanked into the back yard, where he saw a man;
holding up his hand he cried, ‘Anthony
Cripplestraw!’</p>
<p>Cripplestraw came up in a trot, moved a lock of his hair and
replaced it, and said, ‘Yes, Maister Derriman.’
He was old Mr. Derriman’s odd hand in the yard and garden,
and like his employer had no great pretensions to manly beauty,
owing to a limpness of backbone and speciality of mouth, which
opened on one side only, giving him a triangular smile.</p>
<p>‘Well, Cripplestraw, how is it to-day?’ said
Festus, with socially-superior heartiness.</p>
<p>‘Middlin’, considering, Maister Derriman.
And how’s yerself?’</p>
<p>‘Fairish. Well, now, see and clean these military
boots of mine. I’ll cock my foot up on this
bench. This pigsty of my uncle’s is not fit for a
soldier to come into.’</p>
<p>‘Yes, Maister Derriman, I will. No, ’tis not
fit, Maister Derriman.’</p>
<p>‘What stock has uncle lost this year,
Cripplestraw?’</p>
<p>‘Well, let’s see, sir. I can call to mind
that we’ve lost three chickens, a tom-pigeon, and a weakly
sucking-pig, one of a fare of ten. I can’t think of
no more, Maister Derriman.’</p>
<p>‘H’m, not a large quantity of cattle. The
old rascal!’</p>
<p>‘No, ’tis not a large quantity. Old what did
you say, sir?’</p>
<p>‘O nothing. He’s within there.’
Festus flung his forehead in the direction of a right line
towards the inner apartment. ‘He’s a regular
sniche one.’</p>
<p>‘Hee, hee; fie, fie, Master Derriman!’ said
Cripplestraw, shaking his head in delighted censure.
‘Gentlefolks shouldn’t talk so. And an officer,
Mr. Derriman! ’Tis the duty of all cavalry gentlemen
to bear in mind that their blood is a knowed thing in the
country, and not to speak ill o’t.’</p>
<p>‘He’s close-fisted.’</p>
<p>‘Well, maister, he is—I own he is a little.
’Tis the nater of some old venerable gentlemen to be
so. We’ll hope he’ll treat ye well in yer
fortune, sir.’</p>
<p>‘Hope he will. Do people talk about me here,
Cripplestraw?’ asked the yeoman, as the other continued
busy with his boots.</p>
<p>‘Well, yes, sir; they do off and on, you know.
They says you be as fine a piece of calvery flesh and bones as
was ever growed on fallow-ground; in short, all owns that you be
a fine fellow, sir. I wish I wasn’t no more afraid of
the French than you be; but being in the Locals, Maister
Derriman, I assure ye I dream of having to defend my country
every night; and I don’t like the dream at all.’</p>
<p>‘You should take it careless, Cripplestraw, as I do; and
’twould soon come natural to you not to mind it at
all. Well, a fine fellow is not everything, you know.
O no. There’s as good as I in the army, and even
better.’</p>
<p>‘And they say that when you fall this summer,
you’ll die like a man.’</p>
<p>‘When I fall?’</p>
<p>‘Yes, sure, Maister Derriman. Poor soul o’
thee! I shan’t forget ’ee as you lie mouldering
in yer soldier’s grave.’</p>
<p>‘Hey?’ said the warrior uneasily.
‘What makes ’em think I am going to fall?’</p>
<p>‘Well, sir, by all accounts the yeomanry will be put in
front.’</p>
<p>‘Front! That’s what my uncle has been
saying.’</p>
<p>‘Yes, and by all accounts ’tis true. And
naterelly they’ll be mowed down like grass; and you among
’em, poor young galliant officer!’</p>
<p>‘Look here, Cripplestraw. This is a reg’lar
foolish report. How can yeomanry be put in front?
Nobody’s put in front. We yeomanry have nothing to do
with Buonaparte’s landing. We shall be away in a safe
place, guarding the possessions and jewels. Now, can you
see, Cripplestraw, any way at all that the yeomanry can be put in
front? Do you think they really can?’</p>
<p>‘Well, maister, I am afraid I do,’ said the
cheering Cripplestraw. ‘And I know a great warrior
like you is only too glad o’ the chance. ’Twill
be a great thing for ye, death and glory! In short, I hope
from my heart you will be, and I say so very often to
folk—in fact, I pray at night for’t.’</p>
<p>‘O! cuss you! you needn’t pray about
it.’</p>
<p>‘No, Maister Derriman, I won’t.’</p>
<p>‘Of course my sword will do its duty. That’s
enough. And now be off with ye.’</p>
<p>Festus gloomily returned to his uncle’s room and found
that Anne was just leaving. He was inclined to follow her
at once, but as she gave him no opportunity for doing this he
went to the window, and remained tapping his fingers against the
shutter while she crossed the yard.</p>
<p>‘Well, nephy, you are not gone yet?’ said the
farmer, looking dubiously at Festus from under one eyelid.
‘You see how I am. Not by any means better, you see;
so I can’t entertain ’ee as well as I
would.’</p>
<p>‘You can’t, nunc, you can’t. I
don’t think you are worse—if I do, dash my wig.
But you’ll have plenty of opportunities to make me welcome
when you are better. If you are not so brisk inwardly as
you was, why not try change of air? This is a dull, damp
hole.’</p>
<p>‘’Tis, Festus; and I am thinking of
moving.’</p>
<p>‘Ah, where to?’ said Festus, with surprise and
interest.</p>
<p>‘Up into the garret in the north corner. There is
no fireplace in the room; but I shan’t want that, poor soul
o’ me.’</p>
<p>‘’Tis not moving far.’</p>
<p>‘’Tis not. But I have not a soul belonging
to me within ten mile; and you know very well that I
couldn’t afford to go to lodgings that I had to pay
for.’</p>
<p>‘I know it—I know it, Uncle Benjy! Well,
don’t be disturbed. I’ll come and manage for
you as soon as ever this Boney alarm is over; but when a
man’s country calls he must obey, if he is a
man.’</p>
<p>‘A splendid spirit!’ said Uncle Benjy, with much
admiration on the surface of his countenance. ‘I
never had it. How could it have got into the
boy?’</p>
<p>‘From my mother’s side, perhaps.’</p>
<p>‘Perhaps so. Well, take care of yourself,
nephy,’ said the farmer, waving his hand
impressively. ‘Take care! In these warlike
times your spirit may carry ye into the arms of the enemy; and
you are the last of the family. You should think of this,
and not let your bravery carry ye away.’</p>
<p>‘Don’t be disturbed, uncle; I’ll control
myself,’ said Festus, betrayed into self-complacency
against his will. ‘At least I’ll do what I can,
but nature will out sometimes. Well, I’m
off.’ He began humming ‘Brighton Camp,’
and, promising to come again soon, retired with assurance, each
yard of his retreat adding private joyousness to his
uncle’s form.</p>
<p>When the bulky young man had disappeared through the
porter’s lodge, Uncle Benjy showed preternatural activity
for one in his invalid state, jumping up quickly without his
stick, at the same time opening and shutting his mouth quite
silently like a thirsty frog, which was his way of expressing
mirth. He ran upstairs as quick as an old squirrel, and
went to a dormer window which commanded a view of the grounds
beyond the gate, and the footpath that stretched across them to
the village.</p>
<p>‘Yes, yes!’ he said in a suppressed scream,
dancing up and down, ‘he’s after her: she’ve
hit en!’ For there appeared upon the path the figure
of Anne Garland, and, hastening on at some little distance behind
her, the swaggering shape of Festus. She became conscious
of his approach, and moved more quickly. He moved more
quickly still, and overtook her. She turned as if in answer
to a call from him, and he walked on beside her, till they were
out of sight. The old man then played upon an imaginary
fiddle for about half a minute; and, suddenly discontinuing these
signs of pleasure, went downstairs again.</p>
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