<h2><SPAN name="CHAPTER_XXX" id="CHAPTER_XXX"></SPAN>CHAPTER XXX</h2>
<p>Karen was waked next morning by the familiar sound of the
<i>Wohltemperirtes Clavier</i>.</p>
<p>Tante was at work in the music-room and was playing the prelude in D
flat, a special favourite of Karen's.</p>
<p>She lay and listened with a curious, cautious pleasure, like that with
which, half awake, one may guide a charming dream, knowing it to be a
dream. There was so much waiting to be remembered; so much waiting to be
thought. Tante's beautiful notes, rising to her like the bubbles of a
spring through clear water, seemed to encircle her, ringing her in from
the wider consciousness.</p>
<p>While she listened she looked out at the branches of young leaves,
softly stirring against the morning sky. There was her wall-paper, with
the little pink flower creeping up it. She was in her own little bed.
Tante was practising. How sweet, how safe, it was. A drowsy peace filled
her. It was slowly that memory, lapping in, like the sinister, dark
waters of a flood under doors and through crevices, made its way into
her mind, obliterating peace, at first, rather than revealing pain.
There was a fear formless and featureless; and there was loss, dreadful
loss. And as the sense of loss grew upon her, consciousness grew more
vivid, bringing its visions.</p>
<p>This hour of awakening. Gregory's eyes smiling at her, not cold, not
hard eyes then. His hand stretched out to hers; their morning kiss.
Tears suddenly streamed down her face.</p>
<p>It was impossible to hide them from Mrs. Talcott, who came in carrying a
breakfast tray; but Karen checked them, and dried her eyes.</p>
<p>Mrs. Talcott set the tray down on the little table near the bed.</p>
<p>"Is it late, Mrs. Talcott?" Karen asked.</p>
<p>"It's just nine; Mercedes is up early so as to get some work in before
she goes out motoring."</p>
<p>"She is going motoring?"</p>
<p>"Yes, she and Mr. Drew are going off for the day." Mrs. Talcott adjusted
Karen's pillow.</p>
<p>"But I shall see Tante before she goes?" It was the formless,
featureless fear that came closer.</p>
<p>"My, yes! You'll see her all right," said Mrs. Talcott. "She was asking
after you the first thing and hoped you'd stay in bed till lunch. Now
you eat your breakfast right away like a good girl."</p>
<p>Karen tried to eat her breakfast like a good girl and the sound of the
<i>Wohltemperirtes Clavier</i> seemed again to encircle and sustain her.</p>
<p>"How'd you sleep, honey?" Mrs. Talcott inquired. The term hardly
expressed endearment, yet it was such an unusual one from Mrs. Talcott
that Karen could only surmise that her tears had touched the old woman.</p>
<p>"Very, very well," she said.</p>
<p>"How'd you like me to bring up some mending I've got to do and sit by
you till Mercedes comes?" Mrs. Talcott pursued.</p>
<p>"Oh, please do, Mrs. Talcott," said Karen. She felt that she would like
to have Mrs. Talcott there with her very much. She would probably cry
unless Mrs. Talcott stayed with her, and she did not want Tante to find
her crying.</p>
<p>So Mrs. Talcott brought her basket of mending and sat by the window,
sewing in silence for the most part, but exchanging with Karen now and
then a quiet remark about the state of the garden and how the plants
were doing.</p>
<p>At eleven the sound of the piano ceased and soon after the stately tread
of Madame von Marwitz was heard outside. Mrs. Talcott, saying that she
would come back later on, gathered up her mending as she appeared. She
was dressed for motoring, with a long white cloak lined with white fur
and her head bound in nun-like fashion with a white coif and veil.
Beautiful she looked, and sad, and gentle; a succouring Madonna; and
Karen's heart rose up to her. It clung to her and prayed; and the
realisation of her own need, her own dependence, was a new thing. She
had never before felt dependence on Tante as anything but proud and
glad. To pray to her now that she should never belie her loveliness, to
cling to that faith in her without which all her life would be a thing
distorted and unrecognisable, was not pride or gladness and seemed to be
the other side of fear. Yet so gentle were the eyes, so tender the smile
and the firm clasp of the hands taking hers, while Tante murmured,
stooping to kiss her: "Good morning to my child," that the prayer seemed
answered, the faith approved.</p>
<p>If Madame von Marwitz had been taken by surprise the night before, if
she had had to give herself time to think, she had now, it was evident,
done her thinking. The result was this warmly cherishing tenderness.</p>
<p>"Ah," she said, still stooping over Karen, while she put back her hair,
"it is good to have my child back again, mine—quite mine—once more."</p>
<p>"I have slept so well, Tante," said Karen. She was able to smile up at
her.</p>
<p>Madame von Marwitz looked about the room. "And now it is to gather the
dear old life closely about her again. Gardening, and reading; and quiet
times with Tante and Tallie. Though, for the moment, I must be much with
my guest; I am helping him with his work. He has talent, yes; it is a
strange and complicated nature. You did not expect to find him here?"</p>
<p>Karen held Tante's hand and her gaze was innocent of surmise. Mr. Drew
had never entered her thoughts. "No. Yes. No, Tante. He came with you?"</p>
<p>"Yes, he came with me," said Madame von Marwitz. "I had promised him
that he should see Les Solitudes one day. I was glad to find an
occupation for my thoughts in helping him. I told him that if he were
free he might join me. It is good, in great sorrow, to think of others.
Now it is, for the young man and for me, our work. Work, work; we must
all work, <i>ma chérie</i>. It is our only clue in the darkness of life; our
only nourishment in the desert places." Again she looked about the room.
"You came without boxes?"</p>
<p>"Yes, Mrs. Barker is to send them to me."</p>
<p>"Ah, yes. When," said Madame von Marwitz, in a lower voice, "did you
leave? Yesterday morning?"</p>
<p>"No, Tante. The night before."</p>
<p>"The night before? So? And where did you spend the night? With Mrs.
Forrester? With Scrotton? I have not yet written to Scrotton."</p>
<p>"No. I went to the Lippheims."</p>
<p>"The Lippheims? So?"</p>
<p>"The others, Tante, would have talked to me; and questioned me. I could
not have borne that. The Lippheims were so kind."</p>
<p>"I can believe it. They have hearts of gold, those Lippheims. They would
cut themselves in four to help one. And the good Lise? How is she? I am
sorry to have missed Lise."</p>
<p>"And she was, oh, so sorry to have missed you, Tante. She is well, I
think, though tired; she is always tired, you remember. She has too much
to do."</p>
<p>"Indeed, yes; poor Lise. She might have been an artist of the first rank
if she had not given herself over to the making of children. Why did she
not stop at Franz and Lotta and Minna? That would have given her the
quartette,"—Madame von Marwitz smiled—she was in a mildly merry mood.
"But on they go—four, five, six, seven, eight—how many are there—<i>bon
Dieu!</i> of how many am I the god-mother? One grows bewildered. It is
almost a rat's family. Lise is not unlike a white mother-rat, with the
small round eye and the fat body."</p>
<p>"Oh—not a rat, Tante," Karen protested, a little pained.</p>
<p>"A rabbit, you think? And a rabbit, too, is prolific. No; for the rabbit
has not the sharpness, not the pointed nose, the anxious, eager look—is
not so the mother, indeed. Rat it is, my Karen; and rat with a golden
heart. How do you find Tallie? She has been with you all the morning?
You have not talked with Tallie of our calamities?"</p>
<p>"Oh, no, Tante."</p>
<p>"She is a wise person, Tallie; wise, silent, discreet. And I find her
looking well; but very, very well; this air preserves her. And how old
is Tallie now?" she mused.</p>
<p>Though she talked so sweetly there was, Karen felt it now, a
perfunctoriness in Tante's remarks. She was, for all the play of her
nimble fancy, preoccupied, and the sound of the motor-horn below seemed
a signal for release. "Tallie is, <i>mon Dieu</i>," she computed,
rising—"she was twenty-three when I was born—and I am nearly
fifty"—Madame von Marwitz was as far above cowardly reticences about
her age as a timeless goddess—"Tallie is actually seventy-two. Well, I
must be off, <i>ma chérie</i>. We have a long trip to make to-day. We go to
Fowey. He wishes to see Fowey. I pray the weather may continue fine. You
will be with us this evening? You will get up? You will come to dinner?"</p>
<p>She paused at the mantelpiece to adjust her veil, and Karen, in the
glass, saw that her eyes were fixed on hers with a certain intentness.</p>
<p>"Yes, I will get up this morning, Tante," she said. "I will help Mrs.
Talcott with the garden. But dinner? Mrs. Talcott says that she has
supper now. Shall I not have my supper with her? Perhaps she would like
that?"</p>
<p>"That would perhaps be well," said Madame von Marwitz. "That is perhaps
well thought." Still she paused and still, in the glass, she fixed
cogitating eyes on Karen. She turned, then, abruptly. "But no; I do not
think so. On second thoughts I do not think so. You will dine with us.
Tallie is quite happy alone. She is pleased with the early supper. I
shall see you, then, this evening."</p>
<p>A slight irritation lay on her brows; but she leaned with all her
tenderness to kiss Karen, murmuring, "<i>Adieu, mon enfant</i>."</p>
<p>When the sound of the motor had died away Karen got up, dressed and went
downstairs.</p>
<p>The music-room, its windows open to the sea, was full of the signs of
occupancy.</p>
<p>The great piano stood open. Karen went to it and, standing over it,
played softly the dearly loved notes of the prelude in D flat.</p>
<p>She practised, always, on the upright piano in the morning-room; but
when Tante was at home and left the grand piano open she often played on
that. It was a privilege rarely to be resisted and to-day she sat down
and played the fugue through, still very softly. Then, covering the
keys, she shut the lid and looked more carefully about the room.</p>
<p>Flowers and books were everywhere. Mrs. Talcott arranged flowers
beautifully; Karen recognized her skilful hand in the tall branches of
budding green standing high in a corner, the glasses of violets, the
bowls of anemones and the flat dishes of Italian earthenware filled with
primroses.</p>
<p>On a table lay a pile of manuscript; she knew Mr. Drew's small, thick
handwriting. A square silver box for cigarettes stood near by; it was
marked with Mr. Drew's initials in Tante's hand. How kind she was to
that young man; but Tante had always been lavish with those of whom she
was fond.</p>
<p>Out on the verandah the vine-tendrils were already green against the
sky, and on a lower terrace she saw Mrs. Talcott at work, as usual,
among the borders. Mrs. Talcott then, had not yet gone to Helston and
she would not be alone and she was glad of that. In the little cupboard
near the pantry she found a pair of old gardening gloves and her own old
gardening hat. The day was peaceful and balmy; all was as it had always
been, except herself.</p>
<p>She worked all the morning in the garden and walked in the afternoon on
the cliffs with Victor. Victor had come down with Tante.</p>
<p>Mrs. Talcott had adjourned the trip to Helston; so they had tea
together. Her boxes had not yet come and when it was time to dress for
dinner she had nothing to change to but the little white silk with the
flat blue bows upon it, the dress in which Gregory had first seen her.
She had left it behind her when she married and found it now hanging in
a cupboard in her room.</p>
<p>The horn of the returning motor did not sound until she was dressed and
on going down she had the music-room to herself for nearly half an hour.
Then Mr. Drew appeared.</p>
<p>The tall white lamps with their white shades had been brought in, but
the light from the windows mingled a pale azure with the gold. Mr. Drew,
Karen reflected, looked in the dual illumination like a portrait by
Besnard. He had, certainly, an unusual and an interesting face, and it
pleased her to verify and emphasize this fact; for, accustomed as she
was to watching Tante's preoccupations with interesting people, she
could not quite accustom herself to her preoccupation with Mr. Drew. To
account for it he must be so very interesting.</p>
<p>She was not embarrassed by conjectures as to what, after her entry of
last night, Mr. Drew might be thinking about her. It occurred to her no
more than in the past to imagine that anybody attached to Tante could
spare thought to her. And as in the past, despite all the inner
desolation, it was easy to assume to this guest of Tante's the attitude
so habitual to her of the attendant in the temple, the attendant who,
rising from his seat at the door, comes forward tranquilly to greet the
worshipper and entertain him with quiet comment until the goddess shall
descend.</p>
<p>"Did you have a nice drive?" she inquired. "The weather has been
beautiful."</p>
<p>Mr. Drew, coming up to her as she stood in the open window, looked at
her with his impenetrable, melancholy eyes, smiling at her a little.</p>
<p>There was no tastelessness in his gaze, nothing that suggested a
recollection of what he had heard or seen last night; yet Karen was made
vaguely aware from his look that she had acquired some sort of
significance for him.</p>
<p>"Yes, it's been nice," he said. "I'm very fond of motoring. I'd like to
spend my days in a motor—always going faster and faster; and then drop
down in a blissful torpor at night. Madame von Marwitz was so kind and
made the chauffeur go very fast."</p>
<p>Karen was somewhat disturbed by this suggestion. "I am sure that she,
too, would like going very fast. I hope you will not tempt her."</p>
<p>"Oh, but I'm afraid I do," Mr. Drew confessed. "What is the good of a
motor unless you go too fast in it? A motor has no meaning unless it's a
method of intoxication."</p>
<p>Karen received the remark with inattention. She looked out over the sea,
preoccupied with the thought of Tante's recklessness. "I do not think
that going so fast can be good for her music," she said.</p>
<p>"Oh, but yes," Mr. Drew assured her, "nothing is so good for art as
intoxication. Art is rooted in intoxication. It's all a question of how
to get it."</p>
<p>"But with motoring you only get torpor, you say," Karen remarked. And,
going on with her own train of thoughts, "So much shaking will be bad,
perhaps, for the muscles. And there is always the danger to consider. I
hope she will not go too fast. She is too important a person to take
risks." There was no suggestion that Mr. Drew should not take them.</p>
<p>"Don't you like going fast? Don't you like taking risks? Don't you like
intoxication?" Mr. Drew inquired, and his eyes travelled from the blue
bows on her breast to the blue bows on her elbow-sleeves.</p>
<p>"I have never been intoxicated," said Karen calmly—she was quite
accustomed to all manner of fantastic visitors in the temple—"I do not
think that I should like it. And I prefer walking to any kind of
driving. No, I do not like risks."</p>
<p>"Ah yes, I can see that. Yes, that's altogether in character," said Mr.
Drew. He turned, then, as Madame von Marwitz came in, but remained
standing in the window while Karen went forward to greet her guardian.
Madame von Marwitz, as she took her hands and kissed her, looked over
Karen's shoulder at Mr. Drew.</p>
<p>"Why did you not come to my room, <i>chérie</i>?" she asked. "I had hoped to
see you alone before I came down."</p>
<p>"I thought you might be tired and perhaps resting, Tante," said Karen,
who had, indeed, paused before her guardian's door on her way down, and
then passed on with a certain sense of shyness; she did not want in any
way to force herself on Tante.</p>
<p>"But you know that I like to have you with me when I am tired," Madame
von Marwitz returned. "And I am not tired: no: it has been a day of
wings."</p>
<p>She walked down the long room, her arm around Karen, with a buoyancy of
tread and demeanour in which, however, Karen, so deep an adept in her
moods discovered excitement rather than gaiety. "Has it been a good day
for my child?" she questioned; "a happy, peaceful day? Yes? You have
been much with Tallie? I told Tallie that she must postpone the trip to
Helston so that she might stay with you." Tante on the sofa encircled
her and looked brightly at her; yet her eye swerved to the window where
Mr. Drew remained looking at a paper.</p>
<p>Karen said that she had been gardening and walking.</p>
<p>"Good; bravo!" said Tante, and then, in a lower voice: "No news, I
suppose?"</p>
<p>"No; oh no. That could not be, Tante," said Karen, with a startled look,
and Tante went on quickly: "But no; I see. It could not be. And it has,
then, been a happy day for my Karen. What is it you read, Claude?"</p>
<p>Karen's sense of slight perplexity in regard to Tante's interest in Mr.
Drew was deepened when she called him Claude, and her tone now, half
vexed, half light, was perplexing.</p>
<p>"Some silly things that are being said in the House," Mr. Drew returned,
going on reading.</p>
<p>"What things?" said Tante sharply.</p>
<p>"Oh, you wouldn't expect me to read a stupid debate to you," said Mr.
Drew, lifting his eyes with a smile.</p>
<p>Dinner was announced and they went in, Tante keeping her arm around
Karen's shoulders and sweeping ahead with an effect of unawareness as to
her other guest. She had, perhaps, a little lost her temper with him;
and his manner was, Karen reflected, by no means assiduous. At the
table, however, Tante showed herself suave and sweet.</p>
<p>One reason why things seemed a little strange, Karen further reflected,
was that Mrs. Talcott came no longer to dinner; and she was vaguely
sorry for this.</p>
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