<SPAN name="link2H_4_0003" id="link2H_4_0003"></SPAN>
<h2> AUTHOR'S PREFACE </h2>
<p>I will begin with this confession: whatever I have done in the course of
my life, whether it be good or evil, has been done freely; I am a free
agent.</p>
<p>The doctrine of the Stoics or of any other sect as to the force of Destiny
is a bubble engendered by the imagination of man, and is near akin to
Atheism. I not only believe in one God, but my faith as a Christian is
also grafted upon that tree of philosophy which has never spoiled
anything.</p>
<p>I believe in the existence of an immaterial God, the Author and Master of
all beings and all things, and I feel that I never had any doubt of His
existence, from the fact that I have always relied upon His providence,
prayed to Him in my distress, and that He has always granted my prayers.
Despair brings death, but prayer does away with despair; and when a man
has prayed he feels himself supported by new confidence and endowed with
power to act. As to the means employed by the Sovereign Master of human
beings to avert impending dangers from those who beseech His assistance, I
confess that the knowledge of them is above the intelligence of man, who
can but wonder and adore. Our ignorance becomes our only resource, and
happy, truly happy; are those who cherish their ignorance! Therefore must
we pray to God, and believe that He has granted the favour we have been
praying for, even when in appearance it seems the reverse. As to the
position which our body ought to assume when we address ourselves to the
Creator, a line of Petrarch settles it:</p>
<p>'Con le ginocchia della mente inchine.'<br/></p>
<p>Man is free, but his freedom ceases when he has no faith in it; and the
greater power he ascribes to faith, the more he deprives himself of that
power which God has given to him when He endowed him with the gift of
reason. Reason is a particle of the Creator's divinity. When we use it
with a spirit of humility and justice we are certain to please the Giver
of that precious gift. God ceases to be God only for those who can admit
the possibility of His non-existence, and that conception is in itself the
most severe punishment they can suffer.</p>
<p>Man is free; yet we must not suppose that he is at liberty to do
everything he pleases, for he becomes a slave the moment he allows his
actions to be ruled by passion. The man who has sufficient power over
himself to wait until his nature has recovered its even balance is the
truly wise man, but such beings are seldom met with.</p>
<p>The reader of these Memoirs will discover that I never had any fixed aim
before my eyes, and that my system, if it can be called a system, has been
to glide away unconcernedly on the stream of life, trusting to the wind
wherever it led. How many changes arise from such an independent mode of
life! My success and my misfortunes, the bright and the dark days I have
gone through, everything has proved to me that in this world, either
physical or moral, good comes out of evil just as well as evil comes out
of good. My errors will point to thinking men the various roads, and will
teach them the great art of treading on the brink of the precipice without
falling into it. It is only necessary to have courage, for strength
without self-confidence is useless. I have often met with happiness after
some imprudent step which ought to have brought ruin upon me, and although
passing a vote of censure upon myself I would thank God for his mercy.
But, by way of compensation, dire misfortune has befallen me in
consequence of actions prompted by the most cautious wisdom. This would
humble me; yet conscious that I had acted rightly I would easily derive
comfort from that conviction.</p>
<p>In spite of a good foundation of sound morals, the natural offspring of
the Divine principles which had been early rooted in my heart, I have been
throughout my life the victim of my senses; I have found delight in losing
the right path, I have constantly lived in the midst of error, with no
consolation but the consciousness of my being mistaken. Therefore, dear
reader, I trust that, far from attaching to my history the character of
impudent boasting, you will find in my Memoirs only the characteristic
proper to a general confession, and that my narratory style will be the
manner neither of a repenting sinner, nor of a man ashamed to acknowledge
his frolics. They are the follies inherent to youth; I make sport of them,
and, if you are kind, you will not yourself refuse them a good-natured
smile. You will be amused when you see that I have more than once deceived
without the slightest qualm of conscience, both knaves and fools. As to
the deceit perpetrated upon women, let it pass, for, when love is in the
way, men and women as a general rule dupe each other. But on the score of
fools it is a very different matter. I always feel the greatest bliss when
I recollect those I have caught in my snares, for they generally are
insolent, and so self-conceited that they challenge wit. We avenge
intellect when we dupe a fool, and it is a victory not to be despised for
a fool is covered with steel and it is often very hard to find his
vulnerable part. In fact, to gull a fool seems to me an exploit worthy of
a witty man. I have felt in my very blood, ever since I was born, a most
unconquerable hatred towards the whole tribe of fools, and it arises from
the fact that I feel myself a blockhead whenever I am in their company. I
am very far from placing them in the same class with those men whom we
call stupid, for the latter are stupid only from deficient education, and
I rather like them. I have met with some of them—very honest
fellows, who, with all their stupidity, had a kind of intelligence and an
upright good sense, which cannot be the characteristics of fools. They are
like eyes veiled with the cataract, which, if the disease could be
removed, would be very beautiful.</p>
<p>Dear reader, examine the spirit of this preface, and you will at once
guess at my purpose. I have written a preface because I wish you to know
me thoroughly before you begin the reading of my Memoirs. It is only in a
coffee-room or at a table d'hote that we like to converse with strangers.</p>
<p>I have written the history of my life, and I have a perfect right to do
so; but am I wise in throwing it before a public of which I know nothing
but evil? No, I am aware it is sheer folly, but I want to be busy, I want
to laugh, and why should I deny myself this gratification?</p>
<p>'Expulit elleboro morbum bilemque mero.'<br/></p>
<p>An ancient author tells us somewhere, with the tone of a pedagogue, if you
have not done anything worthy of being recorded, at least write something
worthy of being read. It is a precept as beautiful as a diamond of the
first water cut in England, but it cannot be applied to me, because I have
not written either a novel, or the life of an illustrious character.
Worthy or not, my life is my subject, and my subject is my life. I have
lived without dreaming that I should ever take a fancy to write the
history of my life, and, for that very reason, my Memoirs may claim from
the reader an interest and a sympathy which they would not have obtained,
had I always entertained the design to write them in my old age, and,
still more, to publish them.</p>
<p>I have reached, in 1797, the age of three-score years and twelve; I can
not say, Vixi, and I could not procure a more agreeable pastime than to
relate my own adventures, and to cause pleasant laughter amongst the good
company listening to me, from which I have received so many tokens of
friendship, and in the midst of which I have ever lived. To enable me to
write well, I have only to think that my readers will belong to that
polite society:</p>
<p>'Quoecunque dixi, si placuerint, dictavit auditor.'<br/></p>
<p>Should there be a few intruders whom I can not prevent from perusing my
Memoirs, I must find comfort in the idea that my history was not written
for them.</p>
<p>By recollecting the pleasures I have had formerly, I renew them, I enjoy
them a second time, while I laugh at the remembrance of troubles now past,
and which I no longer feel. A member of this great universe, I speak to
the air, and I fancy myself rendering an account of my administration, as
a steward is wont to do before leaving his situation. For my future I have
no concern, and as a true philosopher, I never would have any, for I know
not what it may be: as a Christian, on the other hand, faith must believe
without discussion, and the stronger it is, the more it keeps silent. I
know that I have lived because I have felt, and, feeling giving me the
knowledge of my existence, I know likewise that I shall exist no more when
I shall have ceased to feel.</p>
<p>Should I perchance still feel after my death, I would no longer have any
doubt, but I would most certainly give the lie to anyone asserting before
me that I was dead.</p>
<p>The history of my life must begin by the earliest circumstance which my
memory can evoke; it will therefore commence when I had attained the age
of eight years and four months. Before that time, if to think is to live
be a true axiom, I did not live, I could only lay claim to a state of
vegetation. The mind of a human being is formed only of comparisons made
in order to examine analogies, and therefore cannot precede the existence
of memory. The mnemonic organ was developed in my head only eight years
and four months after my birth; it is then that my soul began to be
susceptible of receiving impressions. How is it possible for an immaterial
substance, which can neither touch nor be touched to receive impressions?
It is a mystery which man cannot unravel.</p>
<p>A certain philosophy, full of consolation, and in perfect accord with
religion, pretends that the state of dependence in which the soul stands
in relation to the senses and to the organs, is only incidental and
transient, and that it will reach a condition of freedom and happiness
when the death of the body shall have delivered it from that state of
tyrannic subjection. This is very fine, but, apart from religion, where is
the proof of it all? Therefore, as I cannot, from my own information, have
a perfect certainty of my being immortal until the dissolution of my body
has actually taken place, people must kindly bear with me, if I am in no
hurry to obtain that certain knowledge, for, in my estimation, a knowledge
to be gained at the cost of life is a rather expensive piece of
information. In the mean time I worship God, laying every wrong action
under an interdict which I endeavour to respect, and I loathe the wicked
without doing them any injury. I only abstain from doing them any good, in
the full belief that we ought not to cherish serpents.</p>
<p>As I must likewise say a few words respecting my nature and my
temperament, I premise that the most indulgent of my readers is not likely
to be the most dishonest or the least gifted with intelligence.</p>
<p>I have had in turn every temperament; phlegmatic in my infancy; sanguine
in my youth; later on, bilious; and now I have a disposition which
engenders melancholy, and most likely will never change. I always made my
food congenial to my constitution, and my health was always excellent. I
learned very early that our health is always impaired by some excess
either of food or abstinence, and I never had any physician except myself.
I am bound to add that the excess in too little has ever proved in me more
dangerous than the excess in too much; the last may cause indigestion, but
the first causes death.</p>
<p>Now, old as I am, and although enjoying good digestive organs, I must have
only one meal every day; but I find a set-off to that privation in my
delightful sleep, and in the ease which I experience in writing down my
thoughts without having recourse to paradox or sophism, which would be
calculated to deceive myself even more than my readers, for I never could
make up my mind to palm counterfeit coin upon them if I knew it to be
such.</p>
<p>The sanguine temperament rendered me very sensible to the attractions of
voluptuousness: I was always cheerful and ever ready to pass from one
enjoyment to another, and I was at the same time very skillful in
inventing new pleasures. Thence, I suppose, my natural disposition to make
fresh acquaintances, and to break with them so readily, although always
for a good reason, and never through mere fickleness. The errors caused by
temperament are not to be corrected, because our temperament is perfectly
independent of our strength: it is not the case with our character. Heart
and head are the constituent parts of character; temperament has almost
nothing to do with it, and, therefore, character is dependent upon
education, and is susceptible of being corrected and improved.</p>
<p>I leave to others the decision as to the good or evil tendencies of my
character, but such as it is it shines upon my countenance, and there it
can easily be detected by any physiognomist. It is only on the fact that
character can be read; there it lies exposed to the view. It is worthy of
remark that men who have no peculiar cast of countenance, and there are a
great many such men, are likewise totally deficient in peculiar
characteristics, and we may establish the rule that the varieties in
physiognomy are equal to the differences in character. I am aware that
throughout my life my actions have received their impulse more from the
force of feeling than from the wisdom of reason, and this has led me to
acknowledge that my conduct has been dependent upon my nature more than
upon my mind; both are generally at war, and in the midst of their
continual collisions I have never found in me sufficient mind to balance
my nature, or enough strength in my nature to counteract the power of my
mind. But enough of this, for there is truth in the old saying: 'Si brevis
esse volo, obscurus fio', and I believe that, without offending against
modesty, I can apply to myself the following words of my dear Virgil:</p>
<p>'Nec sum adeo informis: nuper me in littore vidi<br/>
Cum placidum ventis staret mare.'<br/></p>
<p>The chief business of my life has always been to indulge my senses; I
never knew anything of greater importance. I felt myself born for the fair
sex, I have ever loved it dearly, and I have been loved by it as often and
as much as I could. I have likewise always had a great weakness for good
living, and I ever felt passionately fond of every object which excited my
curiosity.</p>
<p>I have had friends who have acted kindly towards me, and it has been my
good fortune to have it in my power to give them substantial proofs of my
gratitude. I have had also bitter enemies who have persecuted me, and whom
I have not crushed simply because I could not do it. I never would have
forgiven them, had I not lost the memory of all the injuries they had
heaped upon me. The man who forgets does not forgive, he only loses the
remembrance of the harm inflicted on him; forgiveness is the offspring of
a feeling of heroism, of a noble heart, of a generous mind, whilst
forgetfulness is only the result of a weak memory, or of an easy
carelessness, and still oftener of a natural desire for calm and
quietness. Hatred, in the course of time, kills the unhappy wretch who
delights in nursing it in his bosom.</p>
<p>Should anyone bring against me an accusation of sensuality he would be
wrong, for all the fierceness of my senses never caused me to neglect any
of my duties. For the same excellent reason, the accusation of drunkenness
ought not to have been brought against Homer:</p>
<p>'Laudibus arguitur vini vinosus Homerus.'<br/></p>
<p>I have always been fond of highly-seasoned, rich dishes, such as macaroni
prepared by a skilful Neapolitan cook, the olla-podrida of the Spaniards,
the glutinous codfish from Newfoundland, game with a strong flavour, and
cheese the perfect state of which is attained when the tiny animaculae
formed from its very essence begin to shew signs of life. As for women, I
have always found the odour of my beloved ones exceeding pleasant.</p>
<p>What depraved tastes! some people will exclaim. Are you not ashamed to
confess such inclinations without blushing! Dear critics, you make me
laugh heartily. Thanks to my coarse tastes, I believe myself happier than
other men, because I am convinced that they enhance my enjoyment. Happy
are those who know how to obtain pleasures without injury to anyone;
insane are those who fancy that the Almighty can enjoy the sufferings, the
pains, the fasts and abstinences which they offer to Him as a sacrifice,
and that His love is granted only to those who tax themselves so
foolishly. God can only demand from His creatures the practice of virtues
the seed of which He has sown in their soul, and all He has given unto us
has been intended for our happiness; self-love, thirst for praise,
emulation, strength, courage, and a power of which nothing can deprive us—the
power of self-destruction, if, after due calculation, whether false or
just, we unfortunately reckon death to be advantageous. This is the
strongest proof of our moral freedom so much attacked by sophists. Yet
this power of self-destruction is repugnant to nature, and has been
rightly opposed by every religion.</p>
<p>A so-called free-thinker told me at one time that I could not consider
myself a philosopher if I placed any faith in revelation. But when we
accept it readily in physics, why should we reject it in religious
matters? The form alone is the point in question. The spirit speaks to the
spirit, and not to the ears. The principles of everything we are
acquainted with must necessarily have been revealed to those from whom we
have received them by the great, supreme principle, which contains them
all. The bee erecting its hive, the swallow building its nest, the ant
constructing its cave, and the spider warping its web, would never have
done anything but for a previous and everlasting revelation. We must
either believe that it is so, or admit that matter is endowed with
thought. But as we dare not pay such a compliment to matter, let us stand
by revelation.</p>
<p>The great philosopher, who having deeply studied nature, thought he had
found the truth because he acknowledged nature as God, died too soon. Had
he lived a little while longer, he would have gone much farther, and yet
his journey would have been but a short one, for finding himself in his
Author, he could not have denied Him: In Him we move and have our being.
He would have found Him inscrutable, and thus would have ended his
journey.</p>
<p>God, great principle of all minor principles, God, who is Himself without
a principle, could not conceive Himself, if, in order to do it, He
required to know His own principle.</p>
<p>Oh, blissful ignorance! Spinosa, the virtuous Spinosa, died before he
could possess it. He would have died a learned man and with a right to the
reward his virtue deserved, if he had only supposed his soul to be
immortal!</p>
<p>It is not true that a wish for reward is unworthy of real virtue, and
throws a blemish upon its purity. Such a pretension, on the contrary,
helps to sustain virtue, man being himself too weak to consent to be
virtuous only for his own 'gratification. I hold as a myth that Amphiaraus
who preferred to be good than to seem good. In fact, I do not believe
there is an honest man alive without some pretension, and here is mine.</p>
<p>I pretend to the friendship, to the esteem, to the gratitude of my
readers. I claim their gratitude, if my Memoirs can give them instruction
and pleasure; I claim their esteem if, rendering me justice, they find
more good qualities in me than faults, and I claim their friendship as
soon as they deem me worthy of it by the candour and the good faith with
which I abandon myself to their judgment, without disguise and exactly as
I am in reality. They will find that I have always had such sincere love
for truth, that I have often begun by telling stories for the purpose of
getting truth to enter the heads of those who could not appreciate its
charms. They will not form a wrong opinion of me when they see one
emptying the purse of my friends to satisfy my fancies, for those friends
entertained idle schemes, and by giving them the hope of success I trusted
to disappointment to cure them. I would deceive them to make them wiser,
and I did not consider myself guilty, for I applied to my own enjoyment
sums of money which would have been lost in the vain pursuit of
possessions denied by nature; therefore I was not actuated by any
avaricious rapacity. I might think myself guilty if I were rich now, but I
have nothing. I have squandered everything; it is my comfort and my
justification. The money was intended for extravagant follies, and by
applying it to my own frolics I did not turn it into a very different,
channel.</p>
<p>If I were deceived in my hope to please, I candidly confess I would regret
it, but not sufficiently so to repent having written my Memoirs, for,
after all, writing them has given me pleasure. Oh, cruel ennui! It must be
by mistake that those who have invented the torments of hell have
forgotten to ascribe thee the first place among them. Yet I am bound to
own that I entertain a great fear of hisses; it is too natural a fear for
me to boast of being insensible to them, and I cannot find any solace in
the idea that, when these Memoirs are published, I shall be no more. I
cannot think without a shudder of contracting any obligation towards
death: I hate death; for, happy or miserable, life is the only blessing
which man possesses, and those who do not love it are unworthy of it. If
we prefer honour to life, it is because life is blighted by infamy; and
if, in the alternative, man sometimes throws away his life, philosophy
must remain silent.</p>
<p>Oh, death, cruel death! Fatal law which nature necessarily rejects because
thy very office is to destroy nature! Cicero says that death frees us from
all pains and sorrows, but this great philosopher books all the expense
without taking the receipts into account. I do not recollect if, when he
wrote his 'Tusculan Disputations', his own Tullia was dead. Death is a
monster which turns away from the great theatre an attentive hearer before
the end of the play which deeply interests him, and this is reason enough
to hate it.</p>
<p>All my adventures are not to be found in these Memoirs; I have left out
those which might have offended the persons who have played a sorry part
therein. In spite of this reserve, my readers will perhaps often think me
indiscreet, and I am sorry for it. Should I perchance become wiser before
I give up the ghost, I might burn every one of these sheets, but now I
have not courage enough to do it.</p>
<p>It may be that certain love scenes will be considered too explicit, but
let no one blame me, unless it be for lack of skill, for I ought not to be
scolded because, in my old age, I can find no other enjoyment but that
which recollections of the past afford to me. After all, virtuous and
prudish readers are at liberty to skip over any offensive pictures, and I
think it my duty to give them this piece of advice; so much the worse for
those who may not read my preface; it is no fault of mine if they do not,
for everyone ought to know that a preface is to a book what the play-bill
is to a comedy; both must be read.</p>
<p>My Memoirs are not written for young persons who, in order to avoid false
steps and slippery roads, ought to spend their youth in blissful
ignorance, but for those who, having thorough experience of life, are no
longer exposed to temptation, and who, having but too often gone through
the fire, are like salamanders, and can be scorched by it no more. True
virtue is but a habit, and I have no hesitation in saying that the really
virtuous are those persons who can practice virtue without the slightest
trouble; such persons are always full of toleration, and it is to them
that my Memoirs are addressed.</p>
<p>I have written in French, and not in Italian, because the French language
is more universal than mine, and the purists, who may criticise in my
style some Italian turns will be quite right, but only in case it should
prevent them from understanding me clearly. The Greeks admired
Theophrastus in spite of his Eresian style, and the Romans delighted in
their Livy in spite of his Patavinity. Provided I amuse my readers, it
seems to me that I can claim the same indulgence. After all, every Italian
reads Algarotti with pleasure, although his works are full of French
idioms.</p>
<p>There is one thing worthy of notice: of all the living languages belonging
to the republic of letters, the French tongue is the only one which has
been condemned by its masters never to borrow in order to become richer,
whilst all other languages, although richer in words than the French,
plunder from it words and constructions of sentences, whenever they find
that by such robbery they add something to their own beauty. Yet those who
borrow the most from the French, are the most forward in trumpeting the
poverty of that language, very likely thinking that such an accusation
justifies their depredations. It is said that the French language has
attained the apogee of its beauty, and that the smallest foreign loan
would spoil it, but I make bold to assert that this is prejudice, for,
although it certainly is the most clear, the most logical of all
languages, it would be great temerity to affirm that it can never go
farther or higher than it has gone. We all recollect that, in the days of
Lulli, there was but one opinion of his music, yet Rameau came and
everything was changed. The new impulse given to the French nation may
open new and unexpected horizons, and new beauties, fresh perfections, may
spring up from new combinations and from new wants.</p>
<p>The motto I have adopted justifies my digressions, and all the
commentaries, perhaps too numerous, in which I indulge upon my various
exploits: 'Nequidquam sapit qui sibi non sapit'. For the same reason I
have always felt a great desire to receive praise and applause from polite
society:</p>
<p>'Excitat auditor stadium, laudataque virtus<br/>
Crescit, et immensum gloria calcar habet.<br/></p>
<p>I would willingly have displayed here the proud axiom: 'Nemo laeditur nisi
a se ipso', had I not feared to offend the immense number of persons who,
whenever anything goes wrong with them, are wont to exclaim, "It is no
fault of mine!" I cannot deprive them of that small particle of comfort,
for, were it not for it, they would soon feel hatred for themselves, and
self-hatred often leads to the fatal idea of self-destruction.</p>
<p>As for myself I always willingly acknowledge my own self as the principal
cause of every good or of every evil which may befall me; therefore I have
always found myself capable of being my own pupil, and ready to love my
teacher.</p>
<div style="break-after:column;"></div><br />